diff --git a/homepage/blog b/homepage/blog index b029eed..77e3e4d 100755 --- a/homepage/blog +++ b/homepage/blog @@ -37,6 +37,130 @@ __NAVIGATION__ +2023-02-12 + +PREM X BELLA: AN UNLIKELY ROMANCE +Chapter One + Bella woke up before the sun to her alarm, threw it against the wall, +and went back to sleep. + The next time she woke up the sun was blinding in her window and she +realized she was either late for school or about to be. She threw her bedsheets +to the floor, put a piece of toast in her Hello Kitty x Evangelion toaster, +went to the bathroom and quickly brushed her teeth, put on her school uniform, +grabbed the toast as it popped out of the toaster, put it in her mouth, and ran +out the door. + The sun beat down on the Shibuya streets. The cicadas sang and the +birds tweeted, but it irritated Bella, who really needed to get to school. She +ran to the bus stop but saw the bus drive off and decided she could run the +distance, and broke into a sprint towards school. + Prem, a student at the same school, meanwhile was leisurely riding its +bike on a different street. It checked its Casio and knew it had enough time to +get there, so it wasn't worried. Prem had pulled an all nighter making speed in +its parents garage while they were out of town. Prem met an intersection, +waited for the traffic signal, and then crossed. + Meanwhile Bella was running as fast as she could towards her high +school. At the same intersection she figured she could make it and ran across. +Then she got to the corner past the street and ran straight into Prem on its +bicycle. They both fell over onto the ground. + "What the fuck?" Prem cried. + Bella's toast was knocked to the ground and she caught sight of it. +"Noo." + Prem's bicycle chain had come undone. It took its repair kit out from +under the seat and started to repair it. + "I'm so sorry. I'm late for school-" + "So am I, now!" + Bella sniffed and tried not to cry. Not only was she late for school +but in her rush had inflicted the same fate on another. "Is there anything I +can do to help?" + "No. Go away." Now Prem was the one that was irritated. + Bella started walking and then broke into a run and ended up at school +a couple minutes later. The teacher made her stand in the hall holding pails of +water as punishment. Some time after that Prem arrived late too and, to Bella's +surprise, ended up next to her. She whispered to Prem. "You go here too?" + Prem whispered back. "Same class, moron." + Bella had never noticed Prem. It had black hair pulled into a ponytail +and was usually silent in the back of the classroom, either sleeping or writing +down chemical formulas it had thought of. Meanwhile Bella was usually in the +front of the class participating with the current discussion. Bella realized +Prem was really handsome, too, but tried to ignore that. + Prem had always noticed Bella. Bella was the pretty person in the front +of the classroom with all the energy, occasionally interrupting Prem's thought +with pointless interjections regarding the weather or school sports. + They both were quiet for a beat or two before Bella whispered again. +"Can I make it up to you? I'll buy you matcha after school." + Prem replied. "I guess. But it better be good." + And it would be a date. + + You can request chapter 2 through my Patreon, two months' of requests +equals one chapter so if two people request in one month then I'll write it a +month from now or if one person requests twice I'll write it two months from +now. I need money. + +[10:17 AM] bella: the grindset lmfao. i respect it + + Theodore Castleberry woke up in bed next to his wife, Minerva. The sun +shone into the sparse room through the curtains. Minerva still lay sleeping so +before waking her Theodore silently slid out of bed and into the bathroom to +pee and wash his mouth out. The clock said it was seven AM. + After Minerva was awoken and the couple had breakfast that Theodore, +known to his friends as Ted, had cooked - two eggs, some bacon, and some toast +for each of them - and the newspaper had been read, and Minerva had showered, +and the makeup and the deodorant and the day's plan had been discussed, Ted +drove himself and his wife to their work, a small accounting firm that took +contracts from bigger businesses when they needed more resources than they had. +Minerva was filling out papers for a lawn mowing company that didn't expect an +audit from the tax man. Ted was balancing out performance and paychecks for +Johnson Corporate Networking, a computer company in the mid-21st century that +grew into a laboratory and then left the computer field when that dried up. It +wasn't interesting work but it paid the both of them enough to afford a house +together and work breaks too, so an observer might say the two were happy. + Ted, however, felt nothing. He stared at his books and penciled in +number after number, and felt nothing about it. He felt nothing for his wife. +He felt nothing for himself when he looked in the mirror. And he didn't +remember when this started. Nor when he started working for JCN. Nor when he +met Minerva or proposed or even the day before the current day. He knew how to +push a pencil and he remembered how to do his math and he was content, for now. +And when the bell rang and he went to lunch and he ate his soup in peace and +looked at his wife who looked back with a love he couldn't reciprocate he knew +he was lucky. And the bell rang again and he walked back to his desk. + Today something was wrong. Ted didn't know what was wrong. But he +didn't feel right. He felt really, really wrong. The lights, the paper, it was +all wrong. He jerked his legs just to feel his muscle flex and felt his shoe +hit a piece of plastic. + +Metatango + "I wanna learn the metatango." Olive and Shepherd were walking the +halls looking for something to do. + Shepherd observed Olive. "The metatango? Where did you see that?" + Olive pointed at a program she'd kept in her pocket. Learn the +Metatango, with Señora Discorda. + "I don't think that's such a good idea." + "Why not?" + " One + does not simply + do the meta + tango." said Shepherd. + "How did you do that?" + " You + must go now ponder + the very + tango." said Shepherd. + "Are you singing?" + " And + if you must know + the meta + tango," said Shepherd, " you + will have to discuss + the very meta + tango." + "I don't quite understand." + "I'll take you over to Discorda, but don't tell her you're with me, +okay?" + "But I figured the metatango would be, like, a dance. You just sang a +couple bars about the metatango and the weird structure made me think it had +something to do with what the metatango is. But I don't know what it is." + + 2023-02-11 Alliteration in news headlines is so corny. "Panic at the pump" is a