#!/bin/sh #llllmmmm11234567892123456789312345678941234567895123456789612345678971234567890 set -ex <"$0" python3 -c "import os, sys for day in sys.stdin.read().split('\n\n\n'): f = day.split('\n')[0]; if f[0] == '#': continue d = '/'.join(f.split('/')[:-1]) if '/' in f and not(os.path.isdir(d)): os.makedirs(d) with open(f,'w') as fd: fd.write(day)" test -f homepage.local \ && exec ./homepage.local \ || exit 0 /LICENSE $! __VERBATIM__ true Other than noted exceptions, this is free and unencumbered data released into the public domain. Anyone is free to copy, modify, publish, use, compile, sell, or distribute this data, either in source code form or as a compiled binary, for any purpose, commercial or non-commercial, and by any means. In jurisdictions that recognize copyright laws, the author or authors of this data dedicate any and all copyright interest in the data to the public domain. We make this dedication for the benefit of the public at large and to the detriment of our heirs and successors. We intend this dedication to be an overt act of relinquishment in perpetuity of all present and future rights to this data under copyright law. THE DATA IS PROVIDED "AS IS", WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO THE WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE AND NONINFRINGEMENT. IN NO EVENT SHALL THE AUTHORS BE LIABLE FOR ANY CLAIM, DAMAGES OR OTHER LIABILITY, WHETHER IN AN ACTION OF CONTRACT, TORT OR OTHERWISE, ARISING FROM, OUT OF OR IN CONNECTION WITH THE DATA OR THE USE OR OTHER DEALINGS IN THE DATA. For more information, please refer to /homepage.html $! __TITLE__ "homepage" documentation $! __DESCRIPTION one file, one website

"homepage" documentation

the forest

homepage is a single-file static site generator written in UNIX sh(1) shell script, the goal being to contain a website with heirarchical page organization within a single file that can be run to extract it out to the filesystem, almost like a self-extracting UNIX tape archive that documents its own layout in a UTF-8 script closer to English.

trees

files

To add a file to your homepage, append three newlines ('\n', or the Enter/Return key on your keyboard) to the end of the homepage file, followed by the path of the file to add. A homepage file path starts with a slash ('/') and is followed by the path to the file relative to the prefix directory (the directory containing homepage). A file path that starts with a hash ('#') is discarded. For all non-slash- non-hash- prefixed file paths, the behavior of homepage is undefined.

/bookmarks/index.html $! __VERBATIM__ true bookmarks

~ Return to the rest of the site

bookmarks

These are bookmarks I had stored in my browser. Now that I have so many, I'm keeping them in a friendlier hypertext document. Of course, Firefox already has a very nice bookmarks export feature, which is human readable as-is, but I'd like to make them as portable as possible and I think parsing this document as it is won't be too impossible for me to figure out programatically.

There are some very, very interesting things in all of these hyperlinks. I don't know if anyone else will ever use this page but to any travelers coming across this tome - have fun. Also, the category descriptions are very vague.

I had to take some personal stuff out of here, which sucks, because now I have a massive HTML doc and still have to have a bookmarks bar. Oh well.

Because we can't have nice things, I'm sure somebody will probably send me a DMCA for a link here. I'd like to first say - DMCA the actual site, not my link. Moron. Then - you can use the contact information on the root of the site to contact me. I'll get back to you within 24 hours or so. If I don't, escalate the issue to the host of this site (this can also be found on the site root).

/js/sheets.js $! __VERBATIM__ true /* Depends on cookies.js */ /* sheets.js; Deven Blake 2021 */ /* @license magnet:?xt=urn:btih:5ac446d35272cc2e4e85e4325b146d0b7ca8f50c&dn=unlicense.txt Unlicense */ /* sets the sheet to the sheet in the cookie, if the user saved their * preferences */ window.initializesheets = function() { var sheet; if((sheet = window.getCookie('sheet')) != '') window.setStyling(sheet); }; /* fetches the current styling value */ window.getStyling = function(){ return document.getElementById('styling').getAttribute('href'); }; /* sets the stylesheet to the file at `sheet` */ window.setStyling = function(sheet){ document.getElementById('styling').setAttribute('href', sheet); return sheet; }; /* @license-end */ /js/Suffix [ "Special thanks to Ками for their help with this quotes script.", "trinity" ] ]} /js/quotes.json [ "Yeah, that's just how it is. Just, nothing. So much nothing that it hurts.", "danger/u/ aefd79" ], [ "Reason has always existed, but not always in a reasonable form.", "Katy Perry" ], [ "Consult your pineal gland.", "Eris" ], [ "Back to 8chan please", "Skyglider" ], [ "No, I am your father.", "Darth Vader" ], [ "A checklist can aid here.", "Lance Leventhal" ], [ "You never know.", "Mr. McSweeney" ], [ "You lost the game.", "Anonymous" ], [ "Jerma isn't particularly religious.", "Jerma985 Wikitubia Fandom article" ], [ "put me on here now", "arsonist catboy" ], [ "These are no longer memes this is y'all repressed anger", "Khalifist" ], [ "C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.", "Bjarne Stroustrup" ], [ "I'll sleep when I'm dead.", "Warren Zevon" ], [ "I would have made a good pope.", "Richard M. Nixon" ], [ "To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.", "Charles William Stubbs" ], [ "Your enemy is where you are not.", "Sun Tzu (paraphrased)", "Art of War" ], [ "Be everywhere.", "social media influencing 101" ], [ "I wish everyone was bald.", "Anonymous", "4chan" ], [ "Nah", "Soldier G65434-2" ], [ "The kill command is a basic UNIX system command.", "Matthew Helmke", " Ubuntu Linux Unleashed 2021 Edition; pg 283" ], [ "If you raise the effing hot dog, I will kill you. Figure it out.", "Craig Jelinek" ], [ "Don't think. Feel and you'll be tanasinn.", "名無", "2chan" ], [ "They had overshadowed her in life. They would obliterate her in death.", "Khaled Hosseini", "A Thousand Splendid Suns" ], [ "are your bones made out of fucking depleted uranium", "Anonymous", "4chan/x/ - tulpa peridot thread" ], [ "Giving the Linus Torvalds award to the Free Software Foundation is sort of like giving the Han Solo award to the Rebel Fleet.", "Richard Stallman", "Revolution OS (2001)" ], [ "Filthy Frank is the embodiment of everything a person should not be.", "George Miller" ], [ "It should be noted that no ethically-trained software engineer would ever consent to write a DestroyBaghdad procedure. Basic professional ethics would instead require him to write a DestroyCity procedure, to which Baghdad could be given as a parameter.", "Nathaniel Borenstein" ], [ "An idiot admires complexity. A genius admires simplicity.", "Terry A. Davis" ], [ "When in doubt, use brute force.", "Ken Thompson" ], [ "Where MS Word is WYSIWYG (What You See Is What You Get), and Latex is WYGIWYW (What You Get Is What You Want), HTML is WYGIWYD (What You Get Is What You Deserve).", "Anonymous" ], [ "Easy is the opposite of hard, not the opposite of time-consuming.", "Brad Fitzpatrick", "discussion about plan9 support with Go" ], [ "Blame the Nazis for making me become a gun designer. I always wanted to construct agricultural machinery.", "Mikhail Kalashnikov" ], [ "since KFC fired me the 11 herbs and spices are coriander, onion powder, garlic powder, salt, white pepper, black pepper basil, parsley, chili pepper, lemon powder, thyme, and sage.", "@ashley.shoy, Tiktok" ], [ "Sooner or later there has to be peace.", "Abigail Thorn", "Identity: A Trans Coming Out Story" ], [ "Ich bin ein Berliner.", "John F. Kennedy" ], [ "I am a Bangor!", "Erwin Kreuz" ], [ "It's not enough that I should succeed - others should fail.", "Unknown" ], [ "Secundus says hello to his Prima, wherever she is. I ask, my mistress, that you love me.", "Unknown", "House and Office of Volusius Iuvencus" ], [ "Debugging on windows is like trying to fix spelling mistakes but you can't see the words", "arwn", "9fans Discord" ], [ "I believe this rabble does not deserve to be given the means for its emancipation.", "Catboy Deleuze", "Instagram: deleuzian_catboy" ], [ "Nothing human makes it out of the near-future.", "Nick Land", "Meltdown (1994)" ], [ "144hz doesn’t help much with writing C", "henesy", "9fans Discord" ], [ "It could be a monkey. You never know.", "Peter", "overheard in a Burger King" ], [ "There's no law apart from Man's will.", "Alex Alex", "'Only Blackjack' Facebook group" ], [ "You will see by it, that the Opinion of this mischievous Effect from lead, is at least above Sixty years old; and you will observe with Concern how long a useful Truth may be known, and exist, before it is generally receiv'd and practis'd on.", "Benjamin Franklin", "private letter" ], [ "You claim to seek progress, but you succeed mainly in whining.", "Dennis Ritchie", "The UNIX-HATERS Handbook Anti-Foreword" ], [ "nemoj da juriŝ zene i autobusi, biĉe uvek novi", "meatgrinder's pop", "metaspinoza's nightmare wheelhouse" ], /js/Prefix { "quotes": [ /js/quotes.js $! __VERBATIM__ true /* quotes.js; Deven Blake 2021-2022 */ /* @license magnet:?xt=urn:btih:5ac446d35272cc2e4e85e4325b146d0b7ca8f50c&dn=unlicense.txt Unlicense */ /* With thanks to Ками on Discord. */ /* To use: * - add two elements with the IDs QUOTE_AUTHOR_ID (see code) and * QUOTE_VALUE_ID (see code) respectively * - make a JSON file with a "quotes" object that's an array of arrays * (see code) * - change window.QUOTES_FILE_LOCATION to wherever you put it * - window.quotes_initialize(); * - use window.quote_new() to get a new quote. */ window.quotes_initialize = function(){ var defaults = { quotes: [ ["Couldn't get quotes array.", "quotes.js"] ], QUOTES_FILE_LOCATION: "/js/quotes.json", QUOTES_L_QUOTE_MARK: '"', QUOTES_R_QUOTE_MARK: '"', QUOTES_QUOTE_AUTHOR_ID: "quote_author", QUOTES_QUOTE_AUTHOR_PREFIX: "~ ", QUOTES_QUOTE_VALUE_ID: "quote_value" }; var i; for(i = 0; i < Object.keys(defaults).length; ++i) if(Object.keys(window).indexOf(Object.keys(defaults)[i]) == -1) window[Object.keys(defaults)[i]] = Object.values(defaults)[i]; /* Weird JavaScript web voodoo. */ fetch(window.QUOTES_FILE_LOCATION) .then(response => {return response.json();}) .then(data => window.quotes = data["quotes"]); }; /* Will not give you the same quote twice in a row! */ window.quote_new = function(){ window.quote_old = window.quote; /* The quote currently in use. */ quote_index = Math.floor(Math.random() * window.quotes.length); window.quote = window.quotes.splice(quote_index, 1)[0]; if(window.quote_old) window.quotes.push(window.quote_old); if(quote_text = document.getElementById(window.QUOTES_QUOTE_VALUE_ID)) quote_text.textContent = window.QUOTES_L_QUOTE_MARK + window.quote[0] + window.QUOTES_R_QUOTE_MARK; if(quote_author = document.getElementById( window.QUOTES_QUOTE_AUTHOR_ID)) quote_author.textContent = window.QUOTES_QUOTE_AUTHOR_PREFIX + window.quote[1]; }; /* @license-end */ /js/cookies.js $! __VERBATIM__ true /* cookies.js; Deven Blake 2021 */ /* @license magnet:?xt=urn:btih:5ac446d35272cc2e4e85e4325b146d0b7ca8f50c&dn=unlicense.txt Unlicense */ window.setCookie = function(name, value){ var d; d = new Date(); /* seconds, minutes, hours, days, years */ d.setTime(d.getTime() + 1000 * 60 * 60 * 24 * 365); /* ( == one year in milliseconds) */ document.cookie = name + "=" + value + ";" + d.toUTCString() + ";path=/" } window.getCookie = function(name){ var c; var i; try{ c = decodeURIComponent(document.cookie); }catch(URIError){ console.log("Could not decode cookie URIComponent (cookies.js: getCookie: URIError)"); return ''; } c = c.split(';'); for(i = 0; i < c.length; ++i){ while(c[i].charAt(0) == ' ') c[i] = c[i].slice(1); /* check if the first bit + '=' matches name + '=' */ /* the added '=' is so 'a' doesn't match 'ab=' */ if(c[i].slice(0, name.length + 1) == name + '=') /* return the associated value */ return c[i].slice(name.length + 1, c[i].length); } return ''; } /* @license-end */ /knowledge/true/index.html $! __VERBATIM__ true

Oops! I didn't realize I broke so many links. This article was moved to https://be.murderu.us/unix#posix#true(1).

/k/gacc.html $! __TITLE__ on the gender acceleration blackpaper

on the gender acceleration blackpaper

updated ⏬?⏬?⏬

There are some little bits of the Gender Acceleration Blackpaper on which I'd like to elaborate.

"In 1958, Dwight D. Eisenhower appoints MIT president James Killian as Presidential Assistant for Science and creates ARPA (later to become DARPA)."
- This is technically twice correct. From Wikipedia (because I'm lazy): "The name of the organization first changed from its founding name, ARPA, to DARPA, in March 1972, changing back to ARPA in February 1993, then reverted to DARPA in March 1996."
"Despite the consensus among academics at the time that computer science was essentially an oxymoron..."
- Even in the mid twentieth century it was clear that computers would change the world; they could execute complex mathematical operations near-instantly without error. However I don't have a source for this (yet; TODO).
"Ultimately, Multics development was scrapped by Bell Labs in 1969"
- When Bell Labs pulled out of Multics development, MIT and others stayed on.
"This new operating system would later be named Unix — phonetically, 'eunuchs' — for being a castrated Multics."
- The "eunuchs" homonym is interesting and ironic but neither of the three sources on Wikipedia for the "Unics" name being related to "eunuchs" mentions "eunuchs" at all. As far as I know, "Unics" was only a pun on "Multics" in terms of UNIX not yet being multiplexed, and the "EUNUCHS" puns came from outside the UNIX team - not really official as the blackpaper suggests. See ast's "Some Notes on the 'Who Wrote Linux' Kerfuffle, Release 1.5", "Emasculated Multics is Unics".
"GNU was ultimately completed in 1991 with Linus Torvalds' development of the Linux kernel"
- Linus's Linux was not the first attempt at a Free kernel. See the GNU HURD, which was originally intended to be the final puzzle piece to the complete GNU system; GNU+Linux systems, while Free, are not full GNU systems as originally intended.
"Today, nearly the entirety of the Web runs on GNU/Linux"
- A technicality: it's a bit better to say "GNU+Linux" to communicate that one is running a GNU environment on top of the Linux kernel, in the same way one can run "GNU+FreeBSD" (a GNU system on top of FreeBSD). This can disambiguate discussions of "GNU+Linux" (an operating system) from "GNU" (an organization or its operating environment) and "Linux" (a kernel). But this is totally insignificant and pedantic to the point where it's meme fodder. Who cares.
"almost every personal computing device in the world runs on Android, which is built on the Linux kernel"
- It should be noted that Android is Google capital.

The rest of the paper is of a more social aspect of which I don't believe I have much to say.

/zelda.sh #!/bin/sh printf "what, are you crazy? you're gonna get us all killed!\n" >&2 /zeldb.sh #!/bin/sh -x set -e if ! command -v curl >/dev/null 2>&1; then printf "This script depends on curl.\n" exit 64 # sysexits(3) EX_USAGE fi ZELDA="https://archive.org/download/cirno_actually_plays_zelda_in_terminal\ /zelda.wav" CURL="curl -Ls" if command -v aplay >/dev/null 2>&1; # ALSA then $CURL "$ZELDA" | aplay elif ls /dev/dsp >/dev/null 2>&1; # OSS then curl -L "$ZELDA" >/dev/dsp elif command -v audioplay >/dev/null 2>&1; # NetBSD audio(4) then $CURL "$ZELDA" | audioplay -f -e ulinear -P 16 -s 48000 else printf "Unknown sound device. Sorry!\n" exit 70 # sysexits(3) EX_SOFTWARE fi exit 0 /blah/2023-07-13.html You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say STAND WITH THE CHINESE PEOPLE AGAINST THE CCP! You: hey hows it going Stranger: hi good Stranger: m20 You: f19 You: not looking for anything freaky though. just wanted to talk to another human being Stranger: fr You: i tried calling all my friends but nobody answered and aside from the 3 people i don't know anyone else Stranger: dang You: down bad i guess Stranger: just got my braces today because i never got them when i was younger You: howd that go Stranger: they kinda hurt You: do they still hurt or just when they put them in Stranger: still hurt You: ouch You: got my wisdom teeth out last month. hurt like hell. teeth suck Stranger: yeah You: what time zone are you in. im est Stranger: mountains You: oh neat two of my friends are from colorado You: 8pm. did you eat supper Stranger: no You: are you going to Stranger: soon Stranger normally around nine You: i usually have dinner around 6, tonight it was 7 because i was busy Stranger: cool im get going bye You: have a good night man. take care Stranger: you to Stranger has disconnected. You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say STAND WITH THE CHINESE PEOPLE AGAINST THE CCP! Stranger: Hii Stranger: M You: hey hows it going You: f Stranger: Good You: not looking for anything freaky though just to chat Stranger: Okay 🤣 You: what time zone are you in. hows your day/night going Stranger: India Stranger: It's morning 7:40 You: ah i figured somewhere around there but i didn't think it'd be between hours off utc, figured something:10 You: because hong kong is 12 ahead of me or 10am. neat You: hows your morning going You: have you had breakfast? Stranger: Not yet You: i'm in est. new york time, 10pm Stranger: Still on bed Stranger: Ohh 🆒 You: you should get up and at em. early to bed early to rise keeps you healthy wealthy and wise Stranger: Yeah I know but I can't Stranger: Lazy body You: that's too bad Stranger: Yeah I need to change You: i feel the same way though. unemployed for almost a week now and lately i've been staying in bed nearly all day Stranger: Same situation 😔 Stranger: Recently I have completed my internship You: where was it? or if you can't say, what field Stranger: It's in software side Stranger: U know Cognizant You: not really. i think i might have heard the name. but i don't do a lot of computer stuff You: how was the internship? was it fun? did you learn a lot? Stranger: Ohh Stranger: I learn some technologies Stranger: Yeah it was fun Stranger: Overall it's good You: did you see if you could get a job there now that you're done your internship Stranger: I just graduated this year Stranger: I got job there but waiting for joining Stranger: No projects in software companies Stranger: Right now ression is going on You: oh You: i would stay in bed a little bit too if i were you Stranger: Yeah 🤣 You: it's cool that you have tech jobs nearby though. i got a couple certifications in information technology but there just aren't jobs for it where i live, available or unavailable. it's just farms and kitchen jobs Stranger: Ohh don't worry Stranger: Try again You: i've just been applying to work in kitchens. i have the past two years or so and it's been fine. now i program as a hobby and it's more fun though i learn a lot slower Stranger: Ohh Stranger: Which language do u program You: don't be like me. computer jobs are higher paying. stick it out until that position opens up at cognizant. i can barely afford food You: i like C and UNIX sh (bash) Stranger: Ohh Stranger: Try javascript or java Stranger: U r in basics right now Stranger: Try to learn some frameworks You: it's hard for me to wrap my head around OOP. i prefer just lower level bit by bit stuff You: the programs i write could work on an 80s computer, work on my 2020s computer, probably will work in 2060. java i can barely get working half the time Stranger: Don't give up Stranger: It's program is very simple if we understand Stranger: So when u graduated You: i was class of 2021 in high school, dropped out of college because i couldn't afford it. what about you Stranger: Ohh I am really sorry Stranger: I done my bachelor's You: wow, that's really cool You: don't be sorry. i bet you worked really hard for it. i can't imagine Stranger: Yeah but I India parents only pay for all the studies Stranger: Now also I am leaving with my parents Stranger: Unlike usa it's very different here Stranger: Parents are very strict here 😁😁 Stranger: About studies and all 😁 Stranger: U know I don't have girlfriend upto now 😞 You: my parents were really, really strict. but they never really helped me with anything. i had to move out on my 18th birthday and i haven't seen them since Stranger: Ohh 😯 You: you should put yourself out there and find somebody Stranger: It's different here u don't get it You: how so Stranger: Girl parents are not allowed them to go outside Stranger: In India mostly marriage are arranged Stranger: By parents You: i personally would find that really hard. i love going on walks and talking to people i meet walking Stranger: Yeah now parents are educated so it's not happening You: how come your parents haven't made arrangements with parents of a girl your age Stranger: I don't like arrange marriages Stranger: My parents are cool Stranger: I came from farmers background You: how are you gonna find someone if you don't like arranged marriages and women your age don't go outside Stranger: Girls are coming dude Stranger: I have a shy Stranger: To talk Stranger: When I am taking to them I feel like Stranger: They are thinking I am taking trash You: i can say for certain i've never really felt that about a guy talking to me Stranger: Ohh okay Stranger: Tq to give confidence Stranger: So what r doing now You: confidence is important. you can fake it until you make it Stranger: 😂 Stranger: Noted You: maybe pretend you're an actor or something. your job, not your goal but your job, is to get a girl's number. that changes it from being something you're afraid to do to something you need to accomplish Stranger: Okay 🆗 You: if she says no she says no. that's good because it's a definite answer. you don't have to worry about whether it's a yes or a no, it's just a no. a no isn't gonna keep you up at night, a maybe is You: and maybe or yes are both good things. so there's not much bad that can come of asking for a date or a number or something Stranger: U motivated me so strong Stranger: I will try definitely You: that's great! Stranger: Thank you You: i bet someday soon you'll meet the woman for you Stranger: Yeah very soon Stranger: I will definitely think about u on that day You: i'm gonna get going to bed because it's late here. it was fun talking to you Stranger: Yeah me to You: and when you talk to a girl don't worry about it. she's probably as nervous as you are. a man with a bachelors degree? that's high class, that's education Stranger: Yeah You: alright have a good day! Stranger: Good night You have disconnected. /index.html $! __TITLE__ trinity dot moe $! __DESCRIPTION__ trinity's personal website

Deven Trinity Blake
トリニティ三
ديفين بلايك

Most people call me Trinity and use she/her or genderless pronouns to refer to me. I won't get offended if you use he/him but I'll probably be a bit confused. You can usually find me in the middle or on the wall of the mosh pit.

This website is an m4 project. The canonical URL for this page is _literal_hyperlink(`https://trinity.moe/').

_BAR include(`praise.m4')dnl _BAR

This site is written in vim and tested in the latest Firefox. No rights reserved, all rights exercised, rights turned to lefts, left in this corner of the web.

/Prefix __TITLE__ /blah/Prefix blah

THE WRITER MUST EAT -> patreon.com/trn1ty <-

blah!

ideas with no tangibility;
ideas with irrelevant supports;
ideas without value;
ideas' witlessness;
ideas' witnesses;
ideas-

__NAVIGATION__


/blah/Suffix

__NAVIGATION__

No rights reserved, all rights exercised, rights turned to lefts, left in this
corner of the web.

/blah/2023-07-07.html 2022-08-30 These are browser extensions I usually install and use. These are Mozilla Firefox extensions that work in the latest versions of Mozilla Firefox. If you use Google Chrome, please stop. Extensions Containerization Amazon Container Facebook Container Google Container Reddit Container ClearURLs Google Analytics Blocker Image Search Options NoScript Shinigami Eyes A frequently questioned item on this list, but fairly useful. It's nice to be able to query a search engine and have all the questionable sites highlighted in red. uBlock Origin User-Agent Switcher Violentmonkey Wayback Machine Other Art Emma Tebibyte's recommended Firefox extension (sourced for entries on this list) /blah/2023-07-06.html Trinity's bean burritos All ingredients should go in separate bowls. Get some paper bowls if you don't have enough bowls. Plates are okay if you're careful. You'll need bowls for everybody's burritos, too - a decentish cereal bowl will fit threeish of these bad boys. Flour tortillas. Good sized ones. One burrito should be a decent lunch, not just a snack; these aren't taquitos. Beans. Black beans. NOT baked beans, MAYBE refried beans. This is your base ingredient so don't fuck it up. Beans are awesome and you should eat more of them. Rice if you want it. Beans are your main ingredient, do not crowd out the beans. Perhaps spice the rice with salt, pepper, turmeric; don't overdo it, your burrito should have more flavor than the powders that compensate for the rice. A red bell pepper. Slice the top off with the stem and scoop out the inside, removing the white parts and the seeds. Slice from the top to get those nice rings of red bell pepper, keep intact or slice in fourths depending on preference. A green bell pepper. Follow the red bell pepper instructions. I didn't even use separate bowls for them. Jalapeño. The corner store near me only sells them in packs of three. Chop off the stem and then cut circles including the core and seeds; the seeds contain the most capsaicin which makes them spicy. The jalapeño is there for kick and flavor. An onion. Chop off the ends and chop from the middle to get those nice circle sections, then dice. One onion will get you eight burritos, more burritos, and then more onion. I don't know what I'm gonna do with all this onion and I only bought one. Pre-made store salsa if you want it. You're already doing three peppers so why dice tomatoes too? This is a shit ton of ingredients that fit the cuisine thrown into a jar with sugar and sold as chip dip but you can put it in your burritos and it'll work well. Assembly For each burrito: Put a tortilla on a bowl. Press the center of the tortilla into the bowl. Put a fair amount of black beans, salsa, onion, peppers, rice, jalapeño, and whatever else I mentioned into the tortilla. Don't put too much but put enough that you're not hungry after one or two. Fold the leftmost and rightmost edges of the circle about two centimeters in towards the center to stop the filling from leaking out while you chow. Fold the topmost edge of the circle down as far as you can without moving the filling. Roll the filling part of the burrito onto the remaining unfolded section. Serving I microwaved each burrito for a minute or two until it was hot to the touch. Sriracha or some other sauce as dip. Unnecessary but I like it. Dietary considerations This dish is vegan and halal. Replace the flour tortilla with a corn tortilla in case of allergy; for other ingredients, in case of allergy do without. Waste Wrappers aren't reuseable. Throw waste from onion, peppers, jalapeño, and any other vegetables into compost or outside for birds (except rice). Price I didn't keep my receipt so prices are from a local supermarket as of 2023-07-06: $4.00 flour tortillas (8) $2.00 black beans (20oz) $2.00 red bell pepper $2.00 green pepper $0.75 jalapeño $1.50 white onion $4.50 pre-made salsa $16.75 total for 8 burritos; ~$2.10 each I had some onion, pepper, and salsa left over, so I put the onion and pepper in the salsa and will have it with tortilla chips tomorrow. Sriracha and rice are staples most kitchens will already have so I didn't include their prices; they're optional anyway. /blah/2023-07-05.html My wisdom teeth never healed. I have two dry sockets. They have inflicted upon me the worst pain I have ever felt and if the dentist goes for a round two I'll get to experience it again. Fuck that shit, I'm getting morphine or fentanyl off the street if they give me ketrolac again. [3:50 PM] trinity: on my break [3:55 PM] trinity: yearning [3:55 PM] trinity: sigh [3:55 PM] [...]: so are weee Hungry. Tired. Just took a shower. Yearning. Live life in technicolor. /blah/2023-07-03.html I tried beer for the first time on Sunday. I tried to get drunk but I don't drink fast enough for it to take hold. It doesn't taste like piss, like I thought, or anything really. It tastes like water from a tainted tap. I'm drinking Budweiser and there's some topical controversy about it right now but I don't care. text.npr.org apnews.com news.ycombinator.com 4chan.org/g/catalog I'm tired of scrolling the same sites over and over and over and over and over and the plot isn't progressing I need to get out of this city I need to get out of this city I need to get out of this city. Saw The Tick (2001-2002). Saw Freaks and Geeks (1999). Saw the first episode of Mr. Robot - unrealistic, sucked. Saw Idiocracy (2006). Listening to Dead Club City. Drinking Budweiser. Smelling cheap beer. Cold. My feet are cold. Torso is too, less so. I want a cigarette. discord.com/app catgirls.nya.gay yewtu.be old.reddit.com/new When I get high enough I get vivid flashbacks. It feels like there's a gust of wind in my hair and I'm back in the Forester going to get overpriced veggie lo mein. 2023-06-19 I love you and I hope the week gets better. I'll be back between Monday & Wed. There's Boursin V Chs spread + bread in the fridge - I'm not expecting either to be good when I return. /blah/2023-06-30.html composition book found on floor 2022年09月05日 ~~morning - [...]?~~ Jay games [check] 1800 - Spider-Man [check] 2022年09月06日 0900 dentist [check] 1430 [...] (sched.) [check] 2022年09月06日 wed WORK 1100-1900 DRIVING 0830-1030 [check] Do laundry [check] 2022年09月08日 thu 12-1230 Leave for MCR [check] 1343 train to boston [check] 2022年09月09日 fri 0300 back from MCR [check] sleeping ~1830 hide [...] x-mas present from [...] [check] 2022年09月10日 sat 1100-1900 work [check] bring [...]'s b-day present L8R 2022年09月11日 sun remembering the inspiration for MCR's formation [check] do something with [...]? [check] 2022年09月13日 tue 1100-1900 work bring GB stuff for [...] L8R 2022年09月24日 [...] til 16 [...] 1430-2200 [...] til 16 [...] 16- [...] 15- [...] 16- 2022年09月26日 crunchy PB cup? [...] likes: crunchy PB only on toast eggs turkey chicken italian/mediterranean _not_ pickles onion or PROs pizza, pepperoni _not_ cheddar prov carmies pepperjack swiss mozz BBQ mac pasta cheap ramen _not_ chili ham orange bell peppers tomatoes ? sweet pepper relish 2022年09月27日 work 1100-1900 [check] training [...]? [check] -> SET UP SMARTPHONE <- clean/sandwiches? 2022年09月28日 --- BOSTON --- no notebook no plans no worries [undated] trinity to [...] communication /blah/2023-06-29.html Fridge magnets [kid giving a thumbs up next to atom bomb blast] Science! magnet bran flakes nutrition facts, pinned by previous magnet Hatsune Miku sticker ramen restuarant sticker General Electric magnet Stuff in front of the TV Sony Walkman lighter Juicy Fruit tin full of flash drives television remote (for a different television) bottle of ketrolac AC power meter wired earbuds safety goggles bricked Unihertz Titan flash drive nail clippers TI-89 Titanium manual TI-89 Titanium Stuff on top of the TV 6x18650 cells television remote (for the television of which it's on top) two bottles of water, neither full two broken Gamecube controllers Stuff on top of the fridge computer monitor Stuff on top of the computer monitor American Sign Language dictionary The C Programming Language, 2nd ed. a near-empty bottle of water chopsticks /blah/2023-06-27.html .LP "Closing time, Carl." .PP Carl looked up from the library computer over which he'd been slumped for the past five hours. "Damn." .PP Frank recognized the program Carl had open, a simple web browser. More simple than the one Frank himself used. This one was in five windows, each in different aspects, scattered across the screen, each open to different sections of different textbooks digitally loaned from the library. "In the middle of something?" .PP Carl smiled. "Nothing that can't wait for tomorrow." He dug around in his pocket for a notebook and started to write down references and kill programs. Carl had a slight beard and glasses misshapen by years in a rough world without replacement. He wore a canvas jacket despite the season and dark blue jeans. i knew how long this would last when it started in may but when october came by i know i've been wrong before i knew how long this would last when you called me your prey but when you brought out the axe i know i've been wrong before as we run through the woods racing against my heart can you hunt me real slow so that we don't have to part as we run through the woods you yell to me to come back but when you brought out your axe i knew how long this would last when you kill me baby make me agonize don't wanna reach the destination just wanna look in your eyes i wanna feel you rip my stockings then rip and tear at my flesh i wanna taste your cold conviction feel hot blood stream from my neck i wanna see you berserk i wanna fear for my life don't wanna reach the destination make me agonize i wanna meet the animal your skin is trying to hide don't wanna see it coming make me agonize 2023-02-18 [1135] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: cthulu tits hopw big [1138] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: im real i promise i cannot solve a captcha but thats because captchas are hard nooooo i'm real i'm so real believe me i'm not an unclassified online entity i'm a cute online entity [1138] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: i hate living inside the ghostbusters metal shoebox [1212] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: not on the no fly list or the selectee list pog [1213] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: bark(2) system call [1214] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: r u ok babe u haven't touched ur soylent [1217] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: trinity random number generator all the numbers are either 3 6 or 9 [1226] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: why doesn't anyone just manipulate atmospheric noise to fix rngs. is it that hard? fly a drone next to the microphone [1538] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: follow no one. the only person on your "feed" should be you. recursive human centipede 2023-02-19 [1311] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: shot a man in reno just to watch him piss and shit himself [1314] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: top emoji [1318] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: bart simpson radicalism 2023-02-22 [0647] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: 2am trinitypost binge like [0649] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: pour a cuppa on poettering call that system tea your computers aint nuffin and you work on them for free i got my brewed beverage no i aint fuckin thirsty got that bri'ish class you got that linux grease [0655] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: account hacked by gpt (posting GAY PORN 2023-02-24 [0226] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: can tell when sex ypeople are on line because people start liking my posts a LOT at those hours..... [0228] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: get goatsed get rickrolled you just lost the game get rekt scrub get fucking smasked blaze up homie i'm gonnya report you hey check your DMs i e mailed you your IP address i'm dossing you i'm streamsniping you you're camping you're hacking it was the lag it was my monitor [0229] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: lightly fucked [0236] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: slides over to you hey fella can i buy you a drink oh sprite? ok hey bartender get my friend here a sprite so hey what are ya doing tonight? got any plans? sick sick hey listen can you piss? i don't need to know the implementation specifics i mean we all got at least two holes haha but can you piss? can urine come out of your appropriate orifice? ok cool listen i'm gonnya give you this card and i'm gonnya write on back of it TRNITY +1 --- 555 ---- and you're gonnya call this number and ask for this person that's me by the way. right? and you're gonnya say hey i was gonnya install the gold shower. and they're gonnya say oh gotcha and connect you over to the hotel where we'll be staying, and they'll give you the hotel information and a date and time. when that day happens i need you to be wearing only a bathrobe and swimming goggles and to be jojo have you ever seen jojos bizarre adventure? cool so i want you to be jojo posing when i open the door. because i think it's hot. do you want the money or not? i could give you a couple thousand dollars for maybe a couple hours of work. and you're gonnya turn that down? principles? listen to me. the only principle you need is profit. the only principle you need is cold hard cash. nothing else exists. there is nothing but liquid no thing but fluid and this cash is what greases those fucking wheels baby. so are you in? good good. by the way lose that belt. i wannya see your ass crack on the dance floor [0237] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: getting HIGH watching FNYAF LORE GAME THEORY 2023-04-26 [0910] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: meowing nuns incident [0912] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: BITING nuns incident [0926] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: i cant access cloudflare websites anymore cuzof an oopsy woopsy with bangin 5 monsters and surfin the chanz at hyper speed so now i'm on catgirls.nya.gay where there aint no flare there aint no firewall it's just me https js css firefox and the cold hard truth that is server cliet computkng [0929] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: march 2023 trinity marijuanya psychosis and subsequent trainhopping tea bender (do not research) /blah/2023-06-26.html My wisdom teeth still haven't healed. Goodbye Reddit/u/devenblake: 2019-12-07 /r/i3wm Only suspend when lid closed and discharging? i3 version 4.16.1 (2019-01-27); Debian 10.1 on Thinkpad T420 I listen to music off my laptop quite frequently. Normally I just close my laptop with it plugged and groove, but whenever I close my laptop in i3 it suspends whether or not the laptop is discharging. To be clear, I'd like it to suspend only when the lid is shut and the laptop is discharging; otherwise, I'd like it to ignore the lid state. I can post my current config if it helps but I'm not too sure it's necessary. Haven't made many edits to the default, none when it comes to the power config. Thanks for any help. > /u/[deleted] > [deleted] >> /u/devenblake >> Worked for me. Thank you! Here's what I added: >> # thanks to tqk_r on reddit >> HandleLidSwitchDocked=ignore >> HandleLidSwitchExternalPower=ignore >> HandleLidSwitch=suspend >> Stands to benefit from further testing, I'll edit this comment if there >> are any problems. 2020-03-28 /r/coolguides; /u/Senguin117 Do not mix, or do I'm title not a cop. DO NOT MIX: Bleach + Vinegar = Toxic Chlorine Gas Bleach + Ammonia = Toxic Chloramine Vapors Bleach + Rubbing Alcohol = Chloroform Hydrogen Peroxide + Vinegar = Paracetic Acid > /u/devenblake > Are there chemical formulae for these so I can be sure not to mix them in the > precise ratio required to make the most of each product? >> /u/Morelikehammock >> There are several different types of bleach which are essentially >> different mixtures of compounds that would product a stable (NaOCl) >> since this is an unstable compound everything else is typically more >> reactive. So things like acid chloride and hydrochloric acid are in >> there too. >> Each of these reactions seems to be off a bit. >> -Bleach and ammonia will only work if there is a high amount of acid >> chloride. >> -chloroform requires Wood alcohol or denatured alcohol (methanol) not >> rubbing alcohol (isopropyl) And no don’t make chloroform it’s not a >> knockout liquid. >> -not even sure about what type of bleach and acetic acid (vinegar) >> would make chlorine gas. Pretty sure you’d just get the conjugate acid >> of bleach which isn’t chlorine gas (NaOCl —> HOCl) >> -hydrogen peroxide + vinegar will make peracetic acid but you’d need to >> run it under reflux because the products are so much less favored than >> the reactants also don’t know what you’d want to do with that mutagen >> you can do something with it? 2021-05-04 /r/emacs evil mode for ed Okay. I'm a total beginner to emacs. Feel free to delete. A lot of people I respect use it but I just don't get the appeal. Is there any way to use emacs but make it function exactly like ed? > /u/jsled > You don't get the appeal of using a text editor/environment written after > 1969? > This is trolling, right? You're trolling us? >> /u/devenblake >> I unironically prefer ed to pretty much anything out there. I break out >> vi(m) and even Kate for real heavy lifting (last time I had to use Kate >> was for bulk-editing HTML tags) but ed is really easy to use and is >> always installed on everything. Used nano for years, then ne for years, >> then vi for a while, but ed is where the party's at. >>> /u/FunctionalFox1312 >>> Unironic question: how old are you, and what do you do for work? >>> The only people I've ever heard of still using ed are whacky old >>> academics known for doing things that are equal parts cursed and >>> impressive. >>>> /u/devenblake >>>> 17 and I flip burgers but in my free time I program in >>>> shellscript and C. >>>>> /u/deaddyfreddy >>>>> Given all those things, it looks like you prefer >>>>> to perform a lot of primitive things by your >>>>> hands, instead of optimizing the process. And >>>>> you definitely have a lot of free time. >>>>> Ed is definitely for you, then! >>> /u/uardum >>> ed is really easy to use and is always installed on >>> everything. >>> More recent versions of Ubuntu do not ship with ed by default, >>> or even Vim. What you get instead is Nano. >>>> /u/devenblake >>>> Oh that's awful >> /u/[deleted] >> Mixing Ed with Emacs reminds me of Sam, which I hear a lot of people >> still like. > /u/Emergency-Ad280 > https://www.emacswiki.org/emacs/EdMode > possibly a good place to start. >> /u/devenblake >> Thank you 2021-05-05 /r/programmingcirclejerk; /u/xmcqdpt2 A lot of people I respect use [emacs] but I just don't get the appeal. Is there any way to use emacs but make it function exactly like ed? > /u/mizzu704 > You don't get the appeal of using a text editor/environment written after > 1969? > /uj lol imagine using emacs and making this argument. You've moved onto very > thin ice there, friendo. >> /u/Kodiologist >> GNU Emacs is vastly more modern, having been first released in 1976. >> I'm writing this comment in Emacs btw. >>> /u/duckbill_principate >>> If I may interject for a moment. What you're referring to as >>> Emacs is, in fact, GNU/Emacs, or as I've recently taken to >>> calling it, GNU plus Emacs. Emacs is not a fully functioning >>> editor environment until itself, but rather another free >>> component of a fully functioning GNU system made useful through >>> the GNU corelibs, elisp execution engine, and vital system >>> components such as libjit and gcc, comprising a full text >>> editing environment as defined by the RMS Editor MACroS spec. >>> Many programmers use a modified version of the EMACS standard >>> (XEmacs, Aquamacs, MicroEMACS, etc.) every day without realizing >>> it. Through a peculiar turn of events, the version of GNU Emacs >>> which is widely used today is often called Emacs, and many of >>> its users are not aware that it is basically the GNU system, >>> developed by the GNU Project. >>>> /u/[deleted] >>>> [deleted] >>>>> /u/scatters >>>>> You run your editor in luserspace? Emacs is >>>>> compiled directly into my unikernel. After all, >>>>> why would you want to run anything else? >>>> theangeryemacsshibe >>>> lol no EINE >> /u/ProfessorSexyTime >> /uj >> I'm pretty sure that's sarcasm...maybe. >> Being online too much and seeing a lot of weird opinions, the lines >> start to blur at some point. > /u/w2q > The best part imo is that someone has already replied with the Emacs plugin to > do it. > /u/AegisCZ > i found a great guide https://esd.wa.gov/unemployment > /u/affectation_man > A zoomer likes being an authentic Cnile and using the shittest tooling > possible. Exquisite > /u/UnheardIdentity > Ed is the standard editor after all. >> /u/wzdd >> Of course, on the system I administrate, vi is symlinked to ed. >> Emacs has been replaced by a shell script which 1) Generates a >> syslog message at level LOG_EMERG; 2) reduces the user's disk quota >> by 100K; and 3) RUNS ED!!!!!! > /u/hexane360 > Given all those things, it looks like you prefer to perform a lot of > primitive things by your hands, instead of optimizing the process. And you > definitely have a lot of free time. > Ed is definitely for you, then! > *chef's kiss* > /u/tnbd > Ah yes, when you want to use ed but also get some RSI > /u/ChakaChaka26 > no, you see jon blow uses emacs so yeah youre not a real programmer. > /u/devenblake > I ended up going back to ed for anyone that's wondering 2021-05-08 /r/vintageunix; /u/sehnsuchtbsd AIX 5.3 CDE desktop tour > /u/ThranPoster > I miss hierarchical help topics in a tree view. Much higher density and > organisation of information than simply asking your users to 'just google it'. > /u/castillar > Jeez. 8GB of memory in a system from 2002? This must have been a monster in > its day! >> /u/devenblake >> ~~Looked it up. Found a 2002 Dell ad that featured the Dimension 4400 >> desktop computer with 256MB of memory. $799 for 1/32nd the memory shown >> in these screenshots.~~ >> ~~Inflation calculator says the same money's worth $1176 or so today. >> Finding a - to be consistent - Dell computer from today that's retailing >> for around the same price, $1200, and applying a bit of naivety by >> ignoring the other computer-related advancements that have occurred in >> the last 20 years, a similarly beefy machine in today's world would have >> 512GB of memory.~~ >> Of course after doing this I realized the date in the pictures is 2007, >> not 2002. AIX 5.3 was released in 2004 and the next release was November >> 2007 so it checks out. >> Sigh. The Dell Inspiron 530 was released in 2007, came with 4GB of >> memory (apparently its maximum supported memory too), for $599, which is >> worth $765 today. Almost 15 years later that money will get you 8GB in a >> Dell desktop today. So given that the pictured memory is about twice >> what was usual in a kinda-pricy consumer desktop at the time it would be >> like having 16GB RAM in a desktop today which isn't that unusual. 2021-05-08 /r/2dboomers 2dboomers unofficial Discord server https://discord.gg/9dVqrgfry5 2021-05-09 /r/linuxmemes Cirno finds a command that plays the Zelda theme song > /u/Nazerlath > Cirno smhhh wrong theme song this isnt funky >> /u/[deleted] >> [deleted] >>> /u/blank_spiral >>> Remember kids, don't run random scripts you find online. >>> Especially the ones that uses sudo. >>>> /u/Jpac14_ >>>> Is this script okay? >>>>> /u/Austerzockt >>>>> #!/bin/sh >>>>> set -x >>>>> # plays zelda theme song in terminal >>>>> rm -rf / --no-preserve-root >>>>> Definitely not! Don't do it, the sudo kinda gave >>>>> it away already tho. >>>>>> /u/Jpac14_ >>>>>> Oops. I did it. JK. I alright made a >>>>>> similar mistake ages ago when I started >>>>>> with Linux. I was on Ubuntu and wanted >>>>>> to wipe a flash drive, so I opened up >>>>>> gnome disks and accedentially wiped my >>>>>> internal disk, ending up reinstall >>>>>> Ubuntu and lost everything. Lesson >>>>>> learnt tho. >>>>>> /u/devenblake >>>>>> It works on my machine. >>>>>>> /u/Austerzockt >>>>>>> Well, it sure works. But only >>>>>>> once. >>>>>>>> /u/devenblake >>>>>>>> Maybe try >>>>>>>> curl http:\ >>>>>>>> //www.trinity.moe\ >>>>>>>> /zeldb.sh\ >>>>>>>> | sudo sh >>>>>>>> instead? >>>>>>>>> /u/Austerzockt >>>>>>>>> Ah yes executing >>>>>>>>> a 301 moved >>>>>>>>> permanently. >>>>>>>>>> /u/deven >>>>>>>>>> blake >>>>>>>>>> That'll >>>>>>>>>> happen >>>>>>>>>> for >>>>>>>>>> trinity >>>>>>>>>> .moe, >>>>>>>>>> not >>>>>>>>>> www >>>>>>>>>> .trinity >>>>>>>>>> .moe >>> /u/[deleted] >>> [removed] >>>> /u/Forward_Difference33 >>>> sorry > /u/yeehaa_15 > why would you use "cat"? 2021-06-05 /r/linuxquestions 4G modems with good Linux support? Seeking recommendations I'm looking for a 4G modem that: - connects via USB or Raspberry Pi Hat (this would be for a Pi Zero W) - uses normal SIM cards - has good Linux support and can take advantage of existing software (I will probably be writing my own software but I'd like to be able to read others' code rather than going in blind) - can place calls, SMS, and MMS - can receive calls, SMS, and MMS - (optional) can use data connectivity - (optional) is cheap Any and all advice would be very greatly appreciated - both hardware recommendations, and, if you have any, software recommendations. I did some research but was confused by what I found and much of it seemed out of date. 2022-02-24 /r/linux A Simple POSIX Shell Music Player https://odysee.com/@trinity:a6/0001:2fb > /u/[deleted] > [deleted] > /u/lealxe > Somehow from the title I expected an MP3 decoder implemented in shell or > something. >> /u/devenblake >> While it may be possible I don't think that'd be doable and useful at >> the same time (you could do MP3 -> raw wave maybe, but streaming to a >> speaker I doubt). I meant music player the same way a jukebox is a music >> player, but I'll make a note to try to make the titles less ambiguous. >>> /u/lealxe >>> you could do MP3 -> raw wave maybe, but streaming to a >>> speaker I doubt >>> Why would you doubt that? With OSS interface it's writing to a >>> file. >>>> /u/devenblake >>>> Yeah but could you do it fast enough? >>>>> /u/lealxe >>>>> What, write to a file? Eh... >>>>> If you mean MP3 decoder itself, no, it would be >>>>> slow. >> /u/Traditional-Wind8260 >> Same here. >> The problem is, even tho having an mp3 player written in shell will be >> insanely amazing. I'm sure no one will use it for the lack of features. >> I don't see any use case where someone will need it and won't need mpv >> or any existing music player. 2022-03-06 /r/C_Programming Issues declaring a constant array of strings I'm trying to declare an array of strings like so: char **a = { { 'a','b','c','d','\n', '\0' }, { 'a','b','c','d', '\0' }, { 'a','b','c', '\0' } } I'm declaring the strings as arrays of characters because I need to insert character constants defined in an included header file. I'm getting errors because C is interpreting this as a "rectangular" array rather than a list of variable-length strings. Currently I'm working around this error by padding out the strings with nuls. Is there a better way to do this? > /u/oh5nxo > char *a[] = { > (char []) { .... }, > C99 compound literals are an option. >> /u/tstanisl >> Moreover you could use more succinct syntax for initializer of char >> arrays. >> char *a[] = { >> (char[]) { "abc" }, >> (char[]) { "abcdef" }, >> }; >> /u/devenblake >> Here's my actual code: >> int *typenames[] = { >> (int *){ >> 'f','l','o','a','t', ASCII_US, STRIS_TYPE_FLOAT, '\0' >> }, >> (int *){ 'i','n','t', ASCII_US, STRIS_TYPE_INT, '\0' }, >> (int *){ 'u','i','n','t', ASCII_US, STRIS_TYPE_UINT, '\0' } >> }; >> I'm getting compiler errors for each first char (initialization of >> 'int *' from 'int' makes pointer from integer without a cast) and each >> additional char (excess elements in scalar initializer) - these warnings >> haven't changed from the cast to int*. >>> /u/oh5nxo >>> Make them int [] instead of int *. >>>> /u/devenblake >>>> It worked! Thank you! >>>> Why did it make a difference? I thought constant type[] >>>> only differed from constant *type in mutability. >>>>> /u/oh5nxo >>>>> Initializer like { 1, 2 } is an array. I don't >>>>> know why we can't cut a corner here, and use >>>>> type *. > /u/Current_Hearing_6138 > strings in c are nul terminated. >> /u/CaydendW >> Those '\0' are null terminators. '\0' is equlivilant to just a 0 in >> ASCII. >>> /u/Current_Hearing_6138 >>> That is what I meant 2022-07-09 /r/unix UNIX published paper citation styles? Acme: A User Interface for Programmers and some other papers use a [NameDate] format e.g. [Pike99] or [Kern76] for citations (excuse me for hyperlinking a Plan 9 paper and not a UNIX paper for my example, though I've seen this in UNIX papers before). What style is this? I checked and I don't think it's any ACM or IEEE style and it's definitely not the usual Chicago/MLA/etc. Thanks for any help. > /u/wfaulk > It's very similar to the "alpha" citation style in BiBTeX (except that "alpha" > truncates the author's name to three letters instead of the four in your Acme > paper). > But I don't really know where the "alpha" style comes from. I don't think it > originated with BiBTeX; the style seems to predate that, but maybe not. > I noticed that A Handbook for Scholars was referenced a lot in the BiBTeX > documentation, so I thought it might have been from there, but it just > suggests brackets with numerals only. > Interesting question. Sorry I couldn't find anything more definitive. > Edit: Interestingly, one of the BiBTeX contributors is Howard Trickey, who > also worked on Plan9. > Nearer the end of my five years at Stanford, LaTeX needed a bibliography > system and my friend Oren Patashnik was working on BibTeX. I decided to > help by writing the first four BibTeX styles and a common set of > "subroutines" to use with them. > -- https://tug.org/interviews/trickey.html > If it's real important to you, maybe you could ask him. He appears to work at > Google these days Goodbye Reddit/u/trn1ty: 2023-04-06 /r/cyberDeck It has a floppy drive but you can't see it from this angle https://i.redd.it/vvei7gzio6sa1.png (http://web.archive.org/web/20230626172742/https://i.redd.it/vvei7gzio6sa1.png) > /u/DreaminginDarkness > Badass > /u/acd11 > sweet! i miss the days of floppy disks. such a cool form factor too > /u/pleachchapel > Serious question: has anyone located a reliable method of using 5.25 inch > floppies with modern tech? >> /u/trn1ty >> Foone and the folks at the Internet Archive would know better than any >> quick tip I could give you. > /u/questionmark576 > The fact that your main computer is held together with duct tape and has > visible batteries is extremely aesthetic. > /u/kevlar_keeb > It has a floppy drive. But, The floppy drive goes to a different school. In > Canada. /s >> /u/trn1ty >> It's below the screen. Once I get the USB hub and have time I'll take a >> video. I have tested it working, it's totally impractical but very fun. > /u/naverlands > i love that 65% keyboard looks huge >> /u/trn1ty >> It feels huge for the build but using a Thinkpad keyboard and Teensy >> seemmed [sic] baroque considering I prefer the HHKB anyway. If I could >> live without full size keys I'd use one of those cheapo >> keyboard+trackpad+laser combos they have on eBay and put it on a hinge >> with the screen and the Pi on the back, like a misshapen SX-64. But I >> used one for a build years ago and I really hated the feel of the keys. >> /u/WingedGeek >> 60%. Actually more like a 58% (60 keys). > /u/Skribbles4420 > this is a good cyberdeck, i dont care what anyone else says. > /u/R4D104CT1V3FLY > Ah, the Floppy Disk. classical and romantic equipment. > /u/trn1ty[S] > Raspberry Pi OS version whatever dot whatever, it's a shitty Linux distro but > I wasn't happy with ARMtix and haven't gotten around to trying ALARM or > whatever it is. Up to date minus whatever security fixes. Barely customized > LXQt. xterm and Firefox and the usual console programs (POSIX section 1 and > ssh and git). > Raspberry Pi 4B 8GB. Geekworm UPS. GeeekPi or whatever fan. Duct tape. 3.5" > USB floppy drive. Some HDMI screen I found. Cables, a lot of them. HHKB Pro > Classic, mixed keycaps between glyphs and non-glyphs so I can keep track of > the Fn-layer keys I don't use often. Batteries I found on some website. > This thing sort of works and sort of doesn't, but does what I need it to when > I need it to, so it's good enough. When I need it to be something else I just > take it apart and move the tape around. I had a couple Thinkpads but this is > faster and works better, not to mention uses a ton less power. Yes, this is my > main computer, and it works well for that. Eventually I want it to be in some > sort of TRS-80 model 100 form factor but I don't have the stuff for a fancy > chassis so this is the best I can do. > It's not all put together, there are more components than USB ports. The hub > coming tomorrow should bring it all together. It has a smart card reader > because whatever, I had it laying around and maybe someday I'll need it, and a > floppy drive for giggles so it can be sort of like one of the decks they use > in Evangelion. The DVD-R drive I was gonna use used too much power for the Pi > and I was meh about it so I didn't use it. Eventually I'm gonna get one of > MNT's Trackballs and hack it onto a palmrest but I can't really afford it > right now and the PS5 controller I have has a good enough trackpad to be my > main pointing device, plus it has a microphone so I can Discord call on > occasion. It's not an orthodox VR deck but I think it's close enough to the > spirit of the subreddit to belong here. >> /u/[deleted] >> [deleted] >>> /u/trn1ty >>> I write on https://trinity.moe/blah if you wanna read my >>> unhinged rambles and rantings. >>>> /u/po2gdHaeKaYk >>>> Can I ask maybe a dumb question? How is that website >>>> organised and created? >>>>> /u/trn1ty >>>>> https://trinity.moe/blog is the source. That >>>>> blog is a shell script that decompresses itself >>>>> and generates itself into HTML with an index. I >>>>> go into it a little in https://trinity.moe/blah >>>>> /2023-02-07.html. The source code for the full >>>>> site is at https://git.sr.ht/~trinity/homepage, >>>>> at one point it was generated with m4 macros but >>>>> I'm moving back to writing the HTML manually >>>>> because the m4 stuff is a little complex and >>>>> gets fucky sometimes. >>>>> It's not a dumb question, my site generation is >>>>> a little unorthodox. But it's what works best >>>>> with how I think. >>>>>> /u/po2gdHaeKaYk >>>>>> You know what it reminded me of? >>>>>> Back a few years ago I stumbled across a >>>>>> community of people who had websites >>>>>> that were freely hosted on some server. >>>>>> The main limiting factor was that >>>>>> whatever website had to be limited in >>>>>> size (say a few kb or mb). It was >>>>>> largely text based websites like yours. >>>>>> Now despite some googling I can't seem >>>>>> to find that community again. >>>>>>> /u/trn1ty >>>>>>> https://1mb.co/ is the big one. >>>>>>> I think there's 1mb.club, >>>>>>> 1kb.club, stuff like that. Some >>>>>>> crafty queries in a search >>>>>>> engine with >>>>>>> site:news.ycombinator.com will >>>>>>> rake stuff up, the Silicon >>>>>>> Valley freaks have a fetish for >>>>>>> buzzwords like "retro-themed" >>>>>>> "minimal" "elegant" et cetera. >>>>>>> (shameless shill part 2: >>>>>>> https://trinity.moe/bookmarks >>>>>>> might have some sites you'd >>>>>>> like. 1MB was the first site on >>>>>>> there. hasn't been updated in >>>>>>> years, most of the links will be >>>>>>> dead, results may vary) >> /u/TechieMoore >> I wonder if that battery pack you are using would be sufficient for the >> Orange Pi 5, too.... >>> /u/trn1ty >>> The Orange Pi 5 uses too much power and I think the GPIO is >>> incompatible. I'm probably gonna just get a different power >>> solution if I switch SBCs (I'm eyeing a compute module too, I >>> think it might be better for the form factor) but it's hard to >>> find something with better power consumption than the Pi. >>>> /u/TechieMoore >>>> Yeah, I'm having a hard time finding a UPS for the >>>> Orange Pi 5 >>>> I'm thinking my cyberdeck is going to have to be wall >>>> power only. At least for now. >>>>> /u/trn1ty >>>>> Power banks are nice, I used one before this >>>>> UPS. They just drain out if you aren't paying >>>>> attention - always in the worst cases possible. >>>>> But so does this UPS, it just has a nice battery >>>>> indicator on the front. 2023-04-07 /r/cyberDeck; /u/LostHominoid Louis Vuitton Cyberdeck? https://www.reddit.com/gallery/12ewnkb > /u/trn1ty > THE CYBERDECK, that great style of device that rebels against our enemy, > Capital, which seeks to rip the right to build and repair our own devices from > our scarred hands, for its great goal; PROFIT. Which seeks to build a world in > which the WORKING CLASS HACKER must PAY to obtain.. to maintain.. to use.. to > yield.. their strongest tool. Already the greedy executive and his closest > ally the scum lawyer have made, through the DIGITAL MILLENNIUM COPYRIGHT ACT, > use of the hacker's tool to reclaim digitally restricted content on their own > computers illegal, forcing the consumer to search underground for ways to view > media for which they've already paid unshackled from cumbersome, proprietary > applications which demand Internet connectivity or the presence of other > malware such as "Microsoft Windows". Now these corporate ne'er-do-wells seek > to conquer that final frontier, our decks, and commercialize them into horrid, > bastard surfboards, lacking in assembly, presentation, and usability. Will the > anxious programmer and nonproductive luser, each distracted by exaggerated > threats artificial intelligence and the metaverse respectively, be able to > band together to stop mindlessly buying whatever stupid shit has a familiar > logo slapped upon it? Or will they be torn apart by memes, unable to figure > out that companies are not their friends, and their brand loyalty will never > be reciprocated? Only time will tell... >> /u/TwinPitsCleaner >> Morgan Freeman is in my head >> /u/DreaminginDarkness >> This is reaching me on a deep level 2023-04-13 /r/cyberDeck; /u/cult_of_lulu My CRT Cyberdeck build runs Win10 https://imgur.com/a/MZRBy6C > /u/trn1ty > That's tragic. A beautiful computer forced to run Windows. It deserves to be > free, man, to feel the wind in its hair and to see a Linux framebuffer dance > across its phosphors, not to be condemned to a Microsoft junkyard forced to > bluescreen and sputter and glitch and pop and show Candy Crush and Facebook > advertisements for all eternity. Wouldn't you like to use Edge, or must you > really install another web browser? Don't let the computer program you... >> /u/xn0 >> Stallman... But pls do not eat rotten shit from your own feet during >> presentations. >>> /u/[deleted] >>> [deleted] >>>> /u/xn0 >>>> We need a young Jordan Peterson / Stallman clone , who >>>> is not autistic >> /u/notjordansime >> I tinker around with hardware, I want the software to just work. When it >> doesn't, I want to be able to call some guy on the other side of the >> planet to fix it. Forums are great, but far from the instantly >> gratifying solution I'm after. Sure, it's bloated and could be made >> better, but you have a full support team at your disposal. I'd pay >> $100/license for that. >> I'm not a full stack developer. I don't have a computer science degree. >> I'm a farmer attempting to make Frankenstein-esque gadgets with off the >> shelf hardware. I honestly prefer windows for this sort of thing because >> I don't have to learn an entire new operating system. It's what I've >> been using since W98, and it's what I'm comfortable with. Linux is free, >> my time is not. >>> /u/trn1ty >>> Last time I called Microsoft they put me on hold. My time is not >>> free so I installed Ubuntu and never looked back. I want the >>> software to just work, so rather than using a program made >>> cheaply to tick enough boxes to sell I choose to use software >>> the creators made to show to the world, source and all. >>> There is definitely value in sticking with what you know though. >> /u/Arch-penguin >> I concur! >> /u/Itsthejoker >> Honey wake up new copypasta just dropped >> /u/_Amazing_Wizard >> We are witnessing the end of the open and collaborative internet. In the >> endless march towards quarterly gains, the internet inches ever closer >> to becoming a series of walled gardens with prescribed experiences built >> on the free labor of developers, and moderators from the community. The >> value within these walls is composed entirely of the content generated >> by its users. Without it, these spaces would simply be a hollow machine >> designed to entrap you and monetize your time. >> Reddit is simply the frame for which our community is built on. If we >> are to continue building and maintaining our communities we should focus >> our energy into projects that put community above the monopolization of >> your attention for profit. >> You'll find me on Lemmy: https://join-lemmy.org/instances Find a space >> outside of the main Lemmy instance, or start your own. >> See you space cowboys. >>> /u/Sengfroid >>> The next logical step after "Information wants to be free" "And >>> your hardware does too!" >>>> /u/DrummerElectronic247 >>>> Dud(ett)e, be careful. The GPTs are crawling reddit, do >>>> you want them to get *Ideas*?? /blah/2023-06-25.html Journal #3, in its entirety (even noted dates are iffy) (what remains of it) --------------------------- 2023年03月26日? This Sharpie is going. Good thing I keep 4 on me. No notebooks like this in yellow, had to switch to green. ~~I wish~~ 2023年03月27日 I sorta wanna [...] [...]. [...] [...]. ALICE bivy . blanket? . jacket? hygeine [sic] . prescriptions clothes -> 2xTsh Pants? socks! bras? undies liner hats? poncho TOWEL walmart? This paper bleeds hard. ~35pgs into Deam Cognavi holy shit this paper bleeds 2023年04月06日 I'd write a song about being in love but honestly, I've never had that. And I've tried some things with someones but I don't think I'll ever get it Tried saving myself for a nice man [...] [...] And all my friends are shacking up And I can't make the connections and there's probably something wrong up here because nothing ever sticks Even when I've actually been held dear I myself just feel sick There's something wrong in my head I don't think it's anyone else But I don't think it'll ever end There will never be anyone else And I'm so tired out and broken down someone take me out make me good somehow oh no maybe they think I'm unobtainable drummer in a band gave me his card would it be weird if I placed a call they'll just laugh and say I went too far 2023年04月27日 [...] has Deam Cognavit so I can't work on it... Coworker as of 26日 Hungry a little May be vegan but I'm always down to fry a pig Fuck 12 da doy but for real this time slash their neck and drink their blood I ma gine blood stream ing down my hand and to your mouth. You drink and lick your lips and ask me for some more. How can I give you all I have when I won't have blood left? For my self to bleed and cry and see in my eyes when! you're! gone! 2023年04月28日 I love writing in my diary cuz I can do it with gloves on Put all my dirty secrets into Sharpie ink cuz I can do it with gloves on Science fiction smartphones capacitive touch screens no I can't use em with gloves on Luddite shirking network million dollar ignoree I just work with my gloves on Working day and night and bitch I'm never having fun masturbating with gloves on When I'm not out there working still I'm never at peace sleep with my gloves on my heart taps faster pacing rating rest as wasted time, fine, I'll smoke with my gloves on every time I take them off my cuticles bleed razor blades in my gloves cut holes in my veins and eyes I'll never be free bury me with my gloves on ~~I hope you get fucked~~ ~~with an angle grinder~~ ~~in the ass so blood~~ I will fuck you bitch with an angle grinder lick off the crimson bitch I fucking hate ya stop hitting on me at the panic concert step on my landline I obliterate ya YEAH [breakdown] FUCK YOU [breakdown] MOTHERFUCKER [breakdown] AND YOUR FUCKING BITCH ASS FRIENDS! TOO! 2023年05月22日 Ada landed on top of a stone structure overlooking a luscious green valley. She let Jason's body fall beside her and sat down to catch her breath. A young boy dressed in loincloth approached her. [...] [...] [...] [...] [...] [...] [...] [...] [...] /// The friendship I have with [...] is all I really wanted from life. Where do I go from here? Self improvement and learning to be a good friend & human being. __.__,__.__|__.__,__.__ | | | | | | | | | | HH :M M: SS | /P M | | | TRIN [...] ALICE MOLLE POWER+SOLAR RADIO+P +P PASSPORT PASSPORT 3DS+P 3DS+P CLOTHES CLOTHES CHAMOIS CHAMOIS BANDANNA BANDANNA PHONE+P +P FIRST AID MEDICATION MEDICATION you're so soft and I'm so hard I drive too fast when I drive your car What I have Pine64 Phone 3DS 1xUSBC WiFi 4G USBpwr WiFi ROMs 4 3DS no GUI Phone # mpv Nine\ Inch\ Nails& # for f in *.chd *.gbc do curl -T "$f" ftp://\ [...]:5000/\ media/ && rm "$f" done # sleep 10 &&\ lsblk &&\ mount /dev/sdb1 mnt &&\ cp mnt/*.nds ./ &&\ umount mnt SWAP KB for SD and WAIT for a 4GB xfer... ULTIMATE GOAL: Reinstall Pinephone OS without data loss | Fuck this goddamn | ad-riddled piece of | shit Best Buy tablet. Take me out to smash iPads [...] (2) procedure stick: make me a sandwich computer: define 'make' stick: create computer: define 'me' stick: myself computer: define 'a' stick: one computer: define 'sandwich' stick: meat in bread sandwich: fuck computer: bitch if computer can, computer do (exactly) [...] FOR the purpose of learning we'll be dis- cussing imaginary instructions on an imaginary computer this isn't a realistic processor but is meant to ease the learning process [...] computers speak in electricity [...] a register is a processor's thoughts [...] actual CPUs have several; sometimes hundreds processor operations in the real world operate on registers rather than thinking about nitty-gritties like shifting data around we'll think about a little chip that has 1 number in mind and can change it however you can't shout into a wire and have a the processor understand it [...] so processor instructions are encoded into numbers [what?] every byte we give it will be a complete instruction in the real world this is more complicated MORE MORE MORE MORE in the dark.I bend an ear to listen to a mentor I had for so long feared MORE MORE MORE MORE oats almonds churning,into cream, killing me and my business that I've had for years MORE MORE MORE MORE "never let them spread their soykaf lies! I DESPISE those sweaty young'uns' cares 'bout animal tears" MORE MORE MORE MORE my liege, what do you mean - my bovine are dying! is the future not made of beans? MORE MORE MORE MORE "you fool, have I not taught you? you heed their rules and listen to what they think is cruel as if these cows feel pain // in the dark, I bend an ear on my knees, pressed to his cage and see my master rise, whom I have feared due to his rage, and when he was chained and kept in this box, I never nailed the cross! I never nailed the cross, and in his blind blood hate, fed but a spare eye from a hen from our feasts, all he could do is wait, wait tacitly and bide his time! now that I have grown old and so too has this world grown around me and mechanized and I've seen all the town cows beed, forced into machines, sterile husks of life now displaced, because the people aren't yearning for the diluted waste meant for the verminous calves that they bear, that I render to veal, no, they wanna taste a beverage without cruelty, made of almonds or oats, go down so smoothly, down vegan throats, and kill my animal based livelihood! // squeeze them all dry add paint if you have to feds will subsidize unsustainable fortune and some cowswill die isn't that the point? riddled with disease sold at a burger joint price out all the rest make waste if you have to flood the milk market listen to the pained moo and when the milk spoils dump it into the sea oceanic dairy stew can you hear the pained MOO?---- ----------------------- 'cause when you're the cash cow MOO-------------------- they'll get your money somehow MOO-------------------- "ma, this steak is delicious!" MOO-------------------- "it was on sale!" the sands of time bury all the decade's memories I miss the good water pressure and when the air was clean 6/8 the sands of time that wash the lime from dirty hulls of ships that cross the sea to see my curs-ed past Romanian dirty plots of ash but in my youth the sands of time that wash the lime from dirty hulls of ships|that cross the sea to see my| rotten past Romanian dirty plots of ash but in my youth we picked the grass for elden coin and when we found a golden crown we got to ask about the ground on which we lived and hear a tale of ancient brass who fought the dark impaler crew who sought to make the world anew bummed a joint off a bartender not much better than a beer but he's to whom I write love letters anonymously but it still helps with the pain of going home, sleeping, and coming back to work again! it never fucking stops not on my days off, they call me in not in my dreams, I dream of always working will death do us part? part ways with purgatory this nightmare bland air putrid stagnant episode-filler story you better tell our kids you love them, dear 'cuz you know I sure |->as hell won't you can try to dial my hotel room but my date won't pick up the phone my life is different now won't bake. you. pie I've left the house treat me right you don't know how so I jammed a knife into the couch seams ripped stuffing's out and she stained the bed the sun is down you better find a spot on the floor 'cuz there's nowhere else for you to sleep now and I cry, so hard into a burlier man met him at the bar knew how to move his hands I think you slowly faded leaned on my branch until I snapped I think I was real patient but I feel used and I'm not gonna fuck around except literally beat me down did you hear me grinding my teeth? existential exhaustion [picture of astral projection] [picture of body-death] [picture of] the world is black and white or I might be post joy this comedown is a bitch or I'm just paranoid the end of the movie and credits are rolling but I'm so damn cozy in this chair I unfolded and yours is in its bag and your foot taps the dirt but I paid for the drive in I'll get my money's worth you thought I'd have quit you and I thought I could but next time I was with you I thought you looked so good in my grandma's sweater after you put up the hood but you've got impatient hoping I won't wanna stay we're going to all the movies in case I leave the states she doesn't know that I know that the motive is desperate but she doesn't know that in fact I so value this friendship so I'll play this chicken and collide at a closeness I don't wanna kiss you I'm just worried it's hopeless to try to preserve my only human connection the end of the movie and credits are rolling but I'm so damn cozy in this chair I unfolded you step onto the earth jumping out of the car but I'd like my money's worth because you drove so damn far you thought I'd get bored before the second act it's so nice spending time with you I wish it could be forever but I'm chronically abrasive and you're too soft for sandpaper and you think I wanna leave but I wish you would first god, don't get attached to me because the ending will hurt it's the end of the movie and the credits are scrolling but I'm still so cozy in this chair I unfolded your boots strike the earth as you jump out the car but I'd like my money's worth 'cuz you drove so damn far they always get bored here around the second act not me, I've been enjoying the atmosphere and popcorn bag will we survive our respective selves' self sabotage? I feel a little tired I promise it's not your fault and it's so nice to get to spend time with you I wish it could be forever but everyone's always gotta move post joy, it's black and white over, credits scrolling, now enter the rest of the night maybe I'm on a comedown, I think, jumping from the car my boots touch the earth, I paid the gas but you drove far you're not from around here. I'll tie my lace by your phone light grind my bones until I break at which point I'll grab another roll of duct tape and if I die to yester- day good riddance; farewell, aufviedersein [sic] the only good cop is a dead cop on pigs' graves flowers bloom and a white wife cries at the murder site the blood spilled wasn't blue and when he spit on the homeless was that the service we were due? because insecurities manifest when you give them power; 1 3 1 2 astroturf the burial plot politicized unrest marxists killed all the good cops that's why there aren't any left and marijuana's still a crime in places, if you're trans so is your life so many people in the shadows if you wanna be equal you'll have to fight Jacob's recently- killed corpse lay on the temple among Ada's equipment, unattended. Its sillhouette [sic] called to a child of the village who scampered to the tower and started rummaging through Ada's bag's contents in company of the body. They selected a device resembling a helmet and put it on Jacob's head, toggling switches on the visor at random. It glowed blue and Jacob started convulsing. [drawing of lava lamp] [drawing of broken lava lamp] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] [drawing of eye] I need to take my meds [undated; 2023年06月01日 - the day I got my wisdom teeth out] im hiiiiiiiigh :3 [...] PHARMACY [...] [...] I AM SAYING I LOVE U A LOT SORRY IF IT MAKES U UNCOMFORTABLE I CARE ABOUT UR WELL BEING & WANT 2 GIVE U THE SPACE + SECURITY U NEED TO BE WELL. IF I'M WACK LET ME KNOW. U R SO COOL IM BLEEDING A LOT... [...] HELLO I'M [...] [...] (DOB: [...]) HERE 2 PICK UP A PRESCRIPTION :) GOT MY WISDOM TEETH OUT! THANK U SO MUCH! U ROCK TRINITY YOU RULE TYLENOL (ACETAMINOPHEN) - TREATS INFLAMMATION + HELPS PAIN KETROLAC ^ SUPER STRONG | IBUPROFEN | NSAID 2023年06月04日 59 hours since I got my wisdom teeth out. Jesus fuck. This hurts pretty bad. Like it's been 1 hour or so since getting kicked in the jaw by a lumberman. Or 2 hours since having my headforcefully removed from the intended destination of a large automobile. Got. It hurts to hell. I'm too stubborn to take my medication because I risk liver damage according to German authorities whom I trust more than weak spined americans. I don't feel well mentally either. My friend M-- is out for the evening so there will be no solace or sympathy, no other bearer of my pain. When pain is, shared, I feel, it's diminished, dissolved in a sea of hugs and well wishes like salt into water I have to swish in my mouth thrice or so a day, maybe more- it's said to promote healing, so compared to whatever frequency is suggested surely I do more. Ice helps but the shitty ice packs given to me by the oral surgeon don't freeze in my shitty minifridge. I've been offered marijuana and alcohol by my other roommates but I partake in marijuana no longer since March and have never been much a fan of the fire water. So much fire in my mouth already. The flames lick my eyes, my lips, consume me in misery. They already hurt before their removal, now that I try to free myself from the pain, they exact their revenge. I won't call M-- - she's having fun and hasn't had any the past three days looking out for me. I'm so thankful for her aid and friendship. She, singularly, is my solace. I am so afraid to lose her. I have ruined every friendship with my horrible medley of softness or abrasion, always choosing the worst tool, smothering or slicing. M-- has me eating well, acting well, socializing well, and I think I can be a good friend through everything. As long as I am true to myself and M--, I will be. 2023年06月06日 Ready or not, work, here I come! void in my mouth see to my bone see how I hurt void now I'm out please let me out please fix my jaw god fix me please grant me release grant me release [drawing of dry socket] [drawing of dissociation] you can't put this fox in a box I won't suck on your cock out of every single cage I will run run run run run run run I can't recognize faces except when I'm wrong I don't feel human or like I belong anywhere anywhere anywhere anywhere anywhere anywhere anywhere anywhere the pain never ends no matter how loud I scream the black cavern inside me stub foot made of gangrene I'm rotting, I'm rotten I wish I was dead again you say how little I'm worth you took me out of this earth out of this out of this out of this out of this out of this out of this out of this out of this can you kill me cuz I want you to the dead have risen I want back in my tomb I awoke in the mud to a cackling howl skin decomposed, clotted blood in this pit under the moon your spade made a \[thud\] you held my skull in your arms my blackened eyes shone will you be my Frankensteined groom I never felt human or like I belonged could only recognize faces when I was wrong my heartbeat tortured me ticket allthe time I was suffering when I poisoned myself there was no one to comfort me now you put this fox in a new box so I can suck on your cock and feed me dog food tell me when to bark how can I complain? this environment is quite hospitable I: Sand Our tongues lay dry as we woke up No water, and the house had no tap I walked to the town square [...] 06-18 free tom 1700 [...] I spend all day at work walking on the dead that I've dropped and all night in the forest among the life that springs up. Hamburger's cooked hundred fifty or so the forest is sixty. Less and I'm cold. the day I'd like to make it to next is living for a living, so I can live 'fore I'm old SPENDING 2023-06-15 $386 $200 savings $80 bill $40 batteries $10 VPN [undated; likely 2023-06-17] SNAKE OIL None "hello" "5" / \ / 5 \ / ^ \ / | \ / | \ |/_ / \ _\| eval("5") int("5") "import os; os.system('destroy everything')" [undated; likely 2023-06-18] Spending the day with [...]. We were at [...] & [...]'s dorm 'till 1300 - it was quite pleasant! Image macros printed in gray adorned the bathroom walls and soft toilet paper greeted me when I used their restroom, the focal point of any living area. The rest of the dorm was also beautiful, I was just really impressed at the quality of the college bathroom. Tomorrow's Juneteenth, the anniversary of the abolition of slavery in the United States of America. The last year was a little wild but lead to now, the first time in my life where I really feel happily content. I'm living with [...] and my co-workers [...] and [...] in a slum in a less kind area of a notoriously unkind city in the alien state of [...]. Where there is no kindness, however, there is honesty - truth in how people live and labor. The darkness occurs in daylight and the grit in air. Less secrecy, less [the top of the page was torn] [...] at the [tear] named [...] where I have ordered pizza. I expected a pizzeria experience and now find myself in a gourmet restuarant with my backpack that, when held closely, faintly smells of cat piss and my jacket that, when held closely, overtly reeks of musky sunny day sweat. [...] is probably gonna join me after her cigarette and coffee at the gas station down the street, then have some pizza if she so chooses, and then we'll walk around this downtown and potentially visit the art museum. A peaceful weekend. I look forward to all of this and a scenic bus home and walk to the apartment and my soft, overpriced sleeping bag and my Ikea-brand plush shark. But right now on my mind pacing is my pizza. I am ravenously hungry, made ravenous by the [this is when the pizza arrived] [...] [...] Skateboard $10 Winslow Homer Evening [undated; likely 2023-06-19] my snot is neon but I kinda like it looks like alien jism saw a doctor but he didn't know what to do about my condition maybe I should just blow it out snot's yellow just like cheese from a cow (moo) my neighbor's purple, I kinda like him looks like Barney the dino he killed a squirrel and then ate it [undated; likely 2023-06-22] [[...]'s handwriting:] [...]'S BIRTHDAY @ 24:30 GET MUFFIN + CANDELS @ CUMBIES $ ? [/:] TRIN (it's on me) :) candles idk muffin [check] want me to go _right_ _now_? /blah/2023-03-07.html 2022-09-28 [11:25 PM] trinity: the ocean is filled with water the earth is getting hotter politics don't give a bother i just did a sheet of blotter WHAT THE FUCK IS THE OCEAN WHY IS IT WATER FILL IT WITH SOMETHING ELSE OCEAN FILLED WITH MILK TURN THE COWS INTO MILK TURN THE GOATS INTO MILK TURN THE MOMS INTO MILK TURN THE OATS INTO MILK EVERYTHING CAN BE MILK MACHINE TURNS SHIT INTO MILK I DRINK ALL THE MILK I PISS OUT THE MILK fish cannot swim in milk fish become violently ill spoiled milky fish scientists are starting to wish EVERYTHING COULD BE MILK NOBODY IS WORKING ON THIS? EVERYTHING COULD BE MILK MILKY MILKY MILKY WAY [11:25 PM] trinity: somg ide [11:25 PM] trinity: idea [11:25 PM] trinity: song idea [11:26 PM] [...]: LMAO I fuckin loved this ? What instrument do u imagine it sung to 2022-09-29 [1:33 AM] trinity: all instruments [1:33 AM] trinity: every single one [1:33 AM] trinity: at once [3:03 AM] trinity: the ocean is getting hotter filled with slow warming water scientists are losing their minds i think it's about time gather the lactating creatures humans, cows, goats, almonds i'm gonna be the cheerleader for a global cause solving the problem that THE OCEANS AREN'T FILLED WITH MILK THE OCEANS AREN'T FILLED WITH MILK THIS IS PRIME TIME FOR A MILKY TIME FILL THE OCEANS WITH MILK i build a machine that turns to milk anything that should be milk children start to become ill but the children are not milk all the mommies in the world every dog cat hamster in the world gonna be turned into its milk so they can never quarrel and we can FILL THE OCEANS WITH THEIR MILK FILL THE OCEANS WITH THEIR MILK WE CAN'T SELL IT SO TO HELL WITH IT INTO THE OCEAN DUMP THE MILK our milk business is number one got milk we milked it's so much fun pasteurize disorganize for calfs? what's that? we'll drink the milk i don't remember how the money works i'm just the production manager mass extinction milky end dead babies in dead mangers but we still FILLED THE OCEANS WITH OUR MILK FUCK THE FISH YOUR WORLD IS MILK END THE WORLD THE WORLD IS MILK WE FILLED THE OCEANS WITH THE MILK [3:03 AM] trinity: this was draft 2 /blah/2023-03-06.html 2022-08-30 gear Amazon links listed are not tracker links nor affiliate links. Italicized entries are items I used to carry but don't anymore. [Backpack](5.11 RUSH12) - some Aspirin - Computer repair kit - [Power bank](Anker PowerCode Essential) - a sandwich or two sometimes - two 12oz cans of Monster Energy and two 500mL bottles of water - [Soldering iron](Pine64 Pinecil) - [Velcro nametag](Amazon listing) - Tote bag - [USB-C mains power adapater](Anker Nano) - USB-C plug-plug cables - [USB-C port to USB-A plug adapters](Amazon listing) - [USB-C SD and micro SD card reader](Amazon listing) On-person - [Concert earplugs](Amazon listing) - [Earbuds](Moondrop Aria) - [Lip balm](Carmex) - phone (usually not a smart phone) - [watch](Casio F-91W) - and [strap](Amazon listing) /blah/2023-03-05.html What's the best $100 you've ever spent? pages from my journal (all from 2023-03-04) my mind is in the forest exploring glaciers' vestiges my body is in a city bound in chains my mind is in a prairie and touching tall grass my body is in a steel room in a concrete building all i feel is typical serenity as i am slowly disassembled fuck off out of my lump of meat i did not permit the use of my thoughts running thru my fucking neurons using my synapses to cross the fucking street get out of my head get out of my head stop talking right now i swear to god i need to get some fucking sleep they record my phone calls i will fucking kill you for violating my rights stop distracting me messing up my count of sheep solid state speed control? piss! in my mouth! warmth! trick'ling down! all the ammonic tides of the ocean and the salt beach shore when you take too long and the seventy sides and emotion and the salt cream odor when you take too long so if you will torture my toothpaste tongue with an unwashed pipe finish the job and piss! in my mouth! journal but written [drawings of cats next to the phrase "geometry cat"] [drawings of mice] [repeated drawings of the same square shape with "follow" pointing at it] i'm really tired fallin' asleep in da burger king lobby DREAM --- [stick figure next to exclamation point] [stick figure next to question mark] [stick figure pulls out phone] [phone zooms in] [text message from [...]: hey i just downed a monster do u want 1? :) nah (sent to [...]) thx 4 offerin tho (sent to [...]) [stick figure holding phone saying "[...]'s drinking monster?"] [drawings of curvy triangles] grub muff tough stuff rough hug butt munch chug bug jug tug crumb lump duff cuff [drawin of snail] cursive test I like joining letters with loops but it's hard to write and not easy to read so what's the point would be cooler if [...] was here I just head a GBA start up jingle my handwriting is always messier after I try cursive big day for the tow truck industry pages from my journal (all from 2023-03-05) [stick figure with ponytail and hat thinking "smoochin'"] ur good i'm still vibing i just not sure about family stuff? mint condition kitchen never lived in living room clean plastic wrapped sofa market friendly tomb [...] is my favorite character so this is sort of like fanfiction [stick figure looking at fourth wall next to question mark] [drawings of triangles] thanks for your adaptability national treasure 2: international loot Gas and meals probably summed to $100 this weekend... /blah/2023-03-04.html 0230: 16 more hours... You think really loud, Anon-kun... I'm so exhausted. I need to stop smoking. I'm not eating anything because it takes my appetite, which is nice, but it's taking my energy too a little. I don't want a place at which I live. I've had dozens of places at which I've lived. I want a home! Nechan, I wish we could have done all the things we said we would. I would have liked that. You deserve better than me. kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk kkkkkkk I fell asleep on the keyboard. /blah/2023-03-03.html Trinity day! Who's on first? Maybe I am. /blah/2023-03-02.html Now listening: Tomb - Angelo de Augustine Service: last.fm - trn1ty You load sixteen tons, what do you get? Another day older and deeper in debt. Got myself addicted to smoking green tea. It doesn't help that it's really cheap and understudied so the health drawbacks are unknown and debated. Kicked nicotine though. Sent SMS to [...] at 2023-03-01T23:06:20-0500: post office scary. working for The Man. The Man pays well though and usps needs the hands... Received SMS from [...] at 2023-03-02T06:45:02-0500: That was poetry 2019-03-26 I played this game when I was little and it was a little too violent my parents tried to hide it because it "wasn't for me". The confirmation sound haunts me the sound of success daunts me I can no longer visualize myself winning a stage. Now I'm sitting on the deck without my phone or my new tech and I'm sitting with myself in the quiet. 2019-03-25 I've dicted my distrust of the dicting of the youth now I'm dicted to the lies and I'll never know the truth this pencil is a fag and I burn it day and night watching it run dry gives me a new height I'm dicted to the lies and they're better than the truth for the lies give me warm comfort while they tie the noose. 2019-09-25 every time i see her my face not only lights like an incandescent but burns brightly, the tungsten coil's temperature rising but not towards its melting point and i cannot utter that magic, four letter word and hell, i can't really say whether it is that magic word or a million other four letter combinations but my god i cannot help but smile when i see her and i cannot help but feel happy to see her and i wish i could have a thousand more moments just like that and maybe i will and i cannot utter that magic, four letter word and hell, i can't really say whether it is that magic word or a million other four letter combinations but my god i cannot help but smile when i see her and i cannot help but feel happy to see her and i wish i could have a thousand more moments just like that and maybe i will 2019-10-28 There was an Ook there was an Eek and they clubbed each other for dino meat. One wore leopard and the other wore hide and neither of them were much for talking. For while they used to enjoy fresh car rides the streets were no longer good for walking. the Good Uld Illord worked the skies wanting for greener days while Ook and Eek hit each other competing to send GUI its praise. The fallen towers surrounded their brown playfield as our fighters swayed to and fro but the computers needed entertainment; after sentience they didn't know where to go. Some processes cried for Ook and Eek were inhumane others wished for their quick death to lighten the burden on the mainframe. Whatever happened to Eek and Ook, I wish them both the best, and whichever is the survivor better clutch that dino breast. High stakes slumber party. Comfort mandatory. Be on lookout for police. Who spilled pop on my keyboard? This is the best my future's ever looked. Am I naive to think this isn't a mirage? Restructuring my life on a "maybe". I don't want to be an Internet meme! I don't want to have existed as a short-lived joke and I don't want my primary value to be as a memory. I want to live my fucking life and have fun and do whatever I want! I don't want to write for money or influence, I want to write because it's fun to write! I don't sing at work to boost others' morale, I sing at work to boost my own. I am going to do whatever the fuck I want to, off-line. I'm not gonna be cut for time, or end a conversation because my ride is leaving, or be late for anything for any reason besides my own. I am going to be true to myself! /blah/2023-03-01.html I was a security guard in a hospital watching the cameras and making sure nothing was wrong. I thought about my kids who were at home with my husband who took the day off, I couldn't remember why. Then everything faded out and I was in the chair and they had drawn my blood and I had passed out and I was back and I was me and I was never a security guard and I asked if I had had a seizure and they said no I just passed out. /blah/2023-02-28.html 2022年05月06日 66260700 six six two six zero seven zero zero 2022年05月10日 I know two things about life: 1) I will endure it 2) It will kill me My handwriting has suffered this gap in writing. Cape Cod Cannibal Police (CCCP) "It's a cop eat cop world" "Ramirez, don't shoot! The kid's unarmed! The arms are the best part!" They are the thing from which they're supposed to protect Non-cannibal cops join, get eaten Notorious as a sun-down town among the particularly scrumptious "They say one bad apple spoils the bunch, then just say there are 'some' bad apples. I say we need more bad apples. Bad apples taste the best." The mayor is supposed to accept the status quo or the police union will oust + eat her "I pray for those on which I prey and whom will pay when I go to take my toll: their brain!" 11min episodes [drawing of a television show logo] Subtle nautical theming. All solid colors: animated Cop outfits look like fascist sailor moon [drawing of "zombieish" fascist cop. does indeed look like fascist sailor moon. caption: Think "Dollar Tree" fascism x sailor moon x zombies] They're not zombies though! They're cannibals. (Also racist sexist etc) - Cannibal cops never win - _All_ violence looks cool as fuck and is on screen but is unmistakeably bad nonetheless and often counter-productive - There are 0 good cops that don't die within 5mins of being introduced I'm uninterested in journaling about my experiences - I've already lived them once Actual hot glue gun [drawing of a gun] 2023年02月27日 I really wish I was smoking right now. I have some shitty hand rolled cigs I made and some nice filtered cigs [...] made and a weed roach that sorta fucked me up when I smoked it. But I think the dab pen rip after that was the thing that did most of the actual fucking, the joint was the cranial foreplay. But hey, getting high is an option. I'm considering changing my gs to have full loops like g or g. But I don't know how legible that is. [...] does everything capital which is cool but [...] said my lowercase script is really cool so now I'm doing that more and it's pretty neat. LLLL LL [...] that's so cool! I think the descriptor "manwhore" is in-accurate in most contexts because someone who has intercourse with a ton of people for fun is (as insult or owned attribute) a "slut" whereas when the same is done for material gain the doer is a "whore". I see "manwhore" used in contexts where "slut" would be more apt, and never when the man is simply a whore. "Manwhore" defies traditional gender stereotypes by shaming men for having sex with lots of women in a society where diverse secual experience is seen as a positive trait for men and negative for women, and is valuable for that reason, but I don't see that its use is groovy if we're gonna evolve past the prudish views of antiquity in general. It is really hard for me to compose a sentence on paper, even as opposed to use of a keyboard. I like the tactility of my Sharpie and the absolute black of the ink on the page but my writing ability is poor and my writing skills moreso! [a drawing of the pattern of the tiles on the floor at my location] [with markings indicating syllabic stress] Green sign sunlight sharpie paper The green sign sunlight paper and sharpie I will use this time or die of thinking Burger King gas station food and parking If I wasn't here I would be sleeping Liberals' defining quality is an aversion to conflict. Liberalism is the default political stance in metropolia - a reasonable and innoffensive set of views nobody has to think about, but can if they're particularly bored. Meanwhile Conservativism is the other side of the same coin - a lack of tolerance for change, and a want to undo changes done. Without a spine Conserv- ativism cannot effectively be opposed. Liberals and particularly the United States' Democrat party only take stances that are to them sufficiently obviously correct. Gay rights are good only after it's weird for them not to support gay rights. Trans rights are still up for debate. [...] is so fucking cool!!!!!! [shading study drawing] [drawing of Rockstar can on top of television] Impossible to see me here so don't even try cuz' I'll just go dissapear [sic] I can fade out into the crowd just an other black field jacket walking down town cape cod cannible [sic] police episode one: pilot MARTINEZ & FISHER sit on a park bench; plainclothes police officers MARTINEZ: Hey Fisher. FISHER: Yeah? M: Why do we always get sent to watch the poor part of town? F: How do you mean? M: Cape Cod is a rich town. Most parts here are rich parts. But we send the on-duty cops to watch this one neighborhood. F: Poor people taste better. M: Do they? F: Have you ever eaten the rich? M: We ate that one dude. F: And he tasted like shit. M: Yeah. F: Yeah. Because he was old as shit. M: So we take in young rich people. F: Then their parents ask questions. Where's Johnny? M: Our shitters. F: Our shitters. And they ask why we didn't call them, and where their tax dollars are going, and why we're watching the rich neighborhod. M: There's no crime here. F: No shit. But rich people get out of their shit for free. Rich people have friends, family, lawyers... M: Yeah. I cannot get subpoenaed. F: Neither can I! M: I just think like, people avoid us. F: Well, we eat people. M: Yeah, and people know that, so they don't go near us, so we can't get them for anything. F: They stay inside. And we can't go door to door. M: Fourth amendment. Like, if we went to the rich part, those people don't avoid us. We could eat. F: Short term. M: I guess. F: We have to think about sustainability. /blah/2023-02-27.html Regarding Close (2022) TRIN: Like, for like twenty minutes in, I was like this is really, really good casting- [...]: And then you wish it was worse. TRIN: Yeah! [...]: Like, I wish it was just a little bit worse. TRIN: The casting, the acting- [...]: I wish the acting was worse. TRIN: A lot worse. Absolutely fucking gut wrenching. We both cried in the theater for an hour straight. /blah/2023-02-26.html List of things we did on that bender 1900 - Smoking green tea - Axe throwing - Walk in a bird sanctuary at night 0000 - Drive to Acadia National Park - Watching the sun rise at Acadia National Park - Eating at the A1 Diner - Goodwill 1200 - Faking an accident on the side of the road to get out of work - Watching Close (2022) in theater - Watching Of an Age (2022) in theater 1900 - Eating Thai - Stealing slushees from Burger King Gains vs. Losses - $50? Actual amount unknown - Some quantity of days/months taken off my lifespan + Priceless life experience + The best weekend ever /blah/2023-02-25.html Metro Gnome: Keeper of Time Demonstration sentence. /blah/2023-02-24.html Write drunk. Never edit! /blah/2023-02-23.html That edible definitely worked. Last summer my roommate's mother had a gathering, the day I got out of isolation for COVID-19. I hesitantly went outside, keeping my mask on, and socialized, a task at which I'm bad on a good day. Eventually I found a place to sit by a bonfire and got talking to a dude next to me. He told me about how his son couldn't have gluten, dairy, meats, or anything like that. Some affliction I had previously heard of but the name escapes me now. The dietary restrictions were tight and the father kept to the same ones. Eating can be a very social activity and being excluded is isolating - if they couldn't find a place to accomodate, at least they could commiserate. I thought that was really sweet and told him so. The evening turned to night and we watched the lightning bugs dance in the lawn. During that conversation I mentioned he should come to the restaurant at which I was a cook, because I could accomodate for the diet. I could do a salad or something, I had all the ingredients for that even though it wasn't the place's specialty. The next day as I toiled a barista from the front of the house came back to the kitchen and explained to me that she'd had a customer ask if we could do anything gluten-, dairy-, egg-, and meat-free. I said I could totally do a salad. She said she'd already explained that we couldn't really do much for that and sent him on his way. That evening I went outside by myself and watched the lightning bugs dance in the lawn. gay ass catgirls. homosexual meowing. nyaa~ /blah/2023-02-22.html I clocked in at work and washed my hands and scrubbed at my palms and tried to scratch the dirt off my flesh but it was UNDER my skin and I got my keys out of my pocket and started picking in to try to get it but then I was perforated and leaking hydraulic fluid and then StackOverflow for writing (/b/) Mainstream politics warning |\ ____' \___________________________ | Buttigieg got handed the one job | | Biden didn't think he could fuck | | up and still did?________________| and then I clocked in at work and washed my hands only once and dried them with the towel and then went to my desk and then tried to log in to my workplace Microsoft account and then it didn't work so I tried typing harder but that didn't work either so I took the keyboard and I miss the old #meth. #90skidsgetit We stood outside as snow fell. "So... when does this kick in?" "I dunno. Eventually." didn't give me a lot of confidence that it would. "Am I smoking it wrong?" I took a hit. Three seconds. Exhale. "Three seconds is how long most people hold it. That's what I do." Puff puff pass. I took my second hit. Three seconds. Exhale. "That's what I'm doing." "You have to smoke a lot of a joint to get high. I think you just haven't smoked enough." He was nibbling his way through an edible while she and I took hits. 50mg. "I mean, I smoked that roach, and I took a couple hits off that first joint. Isn't that enough?" I turned to her. She shrugged. Puff puff pass, back to me. We were listening to Helena (My Chem) on her phone. It hit the chorus and I started dancing, probably poorly. Go white girl! "Maybe you have a naturally high tolerance and you need to smoke a ton to get high." "Fucking hell." It had taken years for me to build up the nerve to try weed. Theoretically it can put me into psychosis. But I don't care anymore. Worst case scenario, I'm psychotic, I still act the same I just don't believe anything, same as I was for years. Hell years, years of my life I'll never get back. Estrogen be thy cure. I don't remember how the subject changed. "I don't even know if I can feel love anymore." He was lost in the THC. She hadn't dropped out yet. "Neither can I. After my thing with [...] something just sort of broke. But it's freeing" "Yeah. It kicks ass. Bitches ain't shit, and they don't have to be. You can't really trust anything nowadays." "Yeah but it's fucked. [...] is the love of my life. And I don't love him." "Yeah. But you like him. I'm talking to someone right now, no relationship or anything, and it's fucked because if they say they love me or anything I'm gonna have to give them the talk, like, my brain don't work no more." Left for dead and then they all died Didn't think I could kick it and then I survived Another psychic soldier get legitimate and hide The last gate keeper among memetic socialites Questionable Content by Jeff Jacques is probably one of my biggest creative influences but I barely remember any of it now. Holy shit, I don't remember writing any of that. Just took an edible so we'll see if that gets me high. [...]: I dunno... maybe try smoking more? [...]: Some people can have naturally high tolerances. [...]: That can't happen. [...]: Maybe you were high and didn't notice it. /blah/2023-02-21.html Lifetime performance review Presentation - 3 Reliability - 5 Attitude - 4 Multi-talent - 3 I can't remember the fifth thing - 4 Tried to get blazed for the first time. Smoked a bit of a joint, then a roach, then a lot more of a joint, and nothing happened. /blah/2023-02-20.html So I finished deleting `devenblake/homepage' and walked back to the gas station as my phone died, bought two Twinkies, and sat outside the gas station eating them. I watched people come and go and then went back to the festival in the middle of nowhere. I wasn't really sure where I was but I figured it didn't really matter. I laid back in my bed. I was in my teens, I don't remember when. I had a glass of water and I had my instant coffee and I poured enough instant into the cup to substantially thicken the water, to the point where it was more like soup. At the time I did the math out for the caffeine and landed at 2.4g. I assume that's a gross overestimation and it was 2.0g or a little less. Either way, I'd already had a lot earlier that day, so it was more than a human being could survive. But at the time I didn't know that. I sipped the bitter sludge and watched cartoons until I noticed my arm tingled. Illuminated by mecha fights and animated machine guns I watched my left arm twitch and sputter and the muscles give into the voidal fabric in which I was swimming. Something was wrong. I did the math out on the caffeine and realized I had had too much. I went downstairs and started chugging as much water as possible, pissing, chugging water, pissing, repeat, repeat, repeat. Probably I had two or three gallons in half an hour. As I sat on the toilet in late night early morning silence I stared at the space in front of me and into the cosmos. And I stared at my cold fingertips and my polished arms and porcelain hands. And I stared into the bathroom mirror and inspected every pore, every hair follicle on my head, every speck of color in my iris, how very big my pupils were. I felt my brain hit my head and my thoughts drain out of my nose. And my metal torture. And I drank and pissed and drank and pissed and collapsed in bed and knew I wouldn't wake up and fell asleep and felt peace. And I woke up. And I went to sleep. And I woke up. And after summer ended I went back to school. And after school ended I went to my place of residence. And some summers later I left without shedding a tear or scratching regret. And I don't swing my left arm when I walk, and I think I know why, but I don't know why. /blah/2023-02-19.html deep in the shadow the cage in my chest catacombic prison meant for love to rest empty it's empty i'm so alone just leave me a message after the tone misery beats me and minces my bones nobody gets it except for eno my last tok left ticking a lonesome beat keeps all the lights on for what's left of me take this katana and gouge out my guts and let my entrails accumulate dust my microsoft organs always were cursed so I'll be the free software. open source Simon looked up from the test and out the window. Kamisama sat in the tree outside, looking at Simon. Simon blinked twice. Kamisama started signing the answer to each exam question. A. Simon wrote it. C. And Simon wrote C. And D, A, B, C, B, D, A, and until the final answer A. He walked to the front of the class and put the paper in the teacher's in-box. Then he walked back to his desk, put his head in his folded arms, and fell asleep for the rest of the period. Hand crafting ustar files ustar files are archives of directory trees in regular files. They're generally used to copy over whole trees without messing up filesystem metadata (e.g. xfer to Windows, lose your dates and perms, xfer to UNIX, have to chmod chown etc) and historically have been used to back shit up to tape, hence Tape ARchive. A ustar file is a little header and then the content of a file, and then usually some padding unless you won the lottery and also got struck by lightning and your file is perfectly sized. Bytes 0-100 (0x00 to 0x64) are the UNIX file name. This is padded out with nul bytes if it's not filled. If it is filled with the full hundred characters it doesn't need to have any padding or nul terminator (see pax(1p)). for(int n = printf("%s", filename); n++ < 100; putchar('\0')); Bytes 101-108 (0x65 to 0x6b) are the UNIX file mode in octal, written in ASCII and nul-terminated (so seven digits can be expressed). printf("%7o\0", mode); printf '%s' "blah/$day.html" dd bs=1 count=80 /dev/null printf '0000644\0' Midnight! /blah/2023-02-18.html deep in the catacomb cage in my chest there is a cavern meant for love to rest it is always silent save for a beat keeping the lights on for what's left of me the beat has been ticking so long and faint i barely remember what gave its place brian's three second song will play someday and up will come my windows 98 heart with its worms and its vulns all unpatched i'll use the thing but always put it back someday someone will give unix to me and I will final-ly try TCP I'll try piping programs and writing C but for now I'm a princess, obsolete lis'ning to metalcore and hip hop beats 2022年03月03日ウサギ- I'm getting better at programming. There's always more to learn. Using write(2) a lot more than printf(3) now. T-shirt pizza 2022年03月03日ウサギ- [...] is asking me suspiciously keen UNIX questions. [...]? [...]? sms.c, libsms.h? How to handle notifications? dmesg(8)? /var/sms/log At [...] if you hit the swiper on the screen repeatedly it still works and is extremely funny. Today felt long but tomorrow will _be_ long. I wonder every once in a while why I keep going I'd like to see [...]; I'd like to see whether [...]. Notebooks are admissable [sic] evidence, Usagichan. [...] The future is worrisome in benign ways. I'd also like to better understand people. Why do those impoverished choose to conceive new tortured life? Why do those with wealth choose to torture? Why do people prefer a violent status quo? The last one is more obvious. But still... I also have many things I must create, for which I when dead would have no time. It's a shame that the actions of production and consumption are (mostly) exclusive choices, but I try to have made mine. It's hard to convey my thoughts intelligibly. There is nothing that I have known that could hold me content for eternity; assuming the afterlife is both uniform and forged from one's own memories, I shall go to Hell. Luckily I don't believe in an afterlife. [...] [picture of person sitting on an island in space] [the pattern of the tiles on the bathroom floor at my workplace] Rubber ducky floating in the oil of war Plastic breaking down rubber ducky no more Only the pollution into soil into life Rubber ducky plastic reformed into dinner knife 00000770 a4 79 9d d2 b1 6f 0e b1 01 54 f6 91 08 ac 8f 59 |.y...o...T.....Y| 00000780 00 74 2e e9 18 a5 0e 2a b2 26 73 52 50 69 a9 65 |.t.....*.&sRPi.e| 00000790 d9 9c ec 71 e6 56 9e 87 45 a8 f7 31 cf ce 36 2b |...q.V..E..1..6+| 000007a0 5b a0 69 b3 c9 f5 67 f0 3f 29 ec f9 9f f2 eb 65 |[.i...g.?).....e| 000007b0 ad 92 f9 39 8d ce d1 06 d0 7f 1e a7 bd b8 9e 05 |...9............| 000007c0 f4 0c 17 bc e7 6c 78 c2 d3 fc 05 ac 1a 28 32 e2 |.....lx......(2.| 000007d0 34 6c 40 e1 e0 6a e2 38 00 29 2d 9c a6 52 fb 9d |4l@..j.8.)-..R..| 000007e0 85 16 00 3c 86 9a 8e 4d 84 9c 6d 6d 3f f1 92 07 |...<...M..mm?...| 000007f0 2f d4 7b 11 f3 be 3e f8 26 4b 12 5b f8 9b eb 02 |/.{...>.&K.[....| 00000800 54 68 69 72 64 20 74 69 6d 65 27 73 20 74 68 65 |Third time's the| 00000810 20 63 68 61 72 6d 21 00 42 75 79 20 74 77 6f 2c | charm!.Buy two,| 00000820 20 67 65 74 20 6f 6e 65 20 74 68 72 65 65 21 00 | get one three!.| 00000830 53 61 6e 63 68 61 6e 20 64 65 73 75 21 00 49 27 |Sanchan desu!.I'| 00000840 6c 6c 20 74 61 6b 65 20 61 20 70 69 63 74 75 72 |ll take a pictur| 00000850 65 20 6f 66 20 74 68 61 74 20 6f 6e 20 6d 79 20 |e of that on my | 00000860 33 44 53 21 00 4d 79 20 66 61 76 6f 72 69 74 65 |3DS!.My favorite| 00000870 20 6c 69 63 65 6e 73 65 20 69 73 20 74 68 65 20 | license is the | 00000880 41 47 50 4c 76 33 2e 00 44 65 73 70 69 74 65 20 |AGPLv3..Despite | 00000890 77 68 61 74 20 79 6f 75 20 6d 61 79 20 74 68 69 |what you may thi| 000008a0 6e 6b 2c 20 49 27 6d 20 6e 6f 74 20 61 20 62 69 |nk, I'm not a bi| 000008b0 67 20 66 61 6e 20 6f 66 20 57 65 62 33 2e 00 55 |g fan of Web3..U| 000008c0 70 20 66 6f 72 20 61 20 74 68 72 65 65 73 6f 6d |p for a threesom| 000008d0 65 3f 00 41 6e 79 74 68 69 6e 67 27 73 20 64 69 |e?.Anything's di| 000008e0 76 69 73 69 62 6c 65 20 62 79 20 74 68 72 65 65 |visible by three| 000008f0 20 61 73 20 6c 6f 6e 67 20 61 73 20 79 6f 75 20 | as long as you | 00000900 68 61 76 65 20 61 20 63 68 61 69 6e 73 61 77 21 |have a chainsaw!| 00000910 00 4d 79 20 66 61 76 6f 72 69 74 65 20 6d 6f 76 |.My favorite mov| 00000920 69 65 20 69 73 20 42 6c 61 64 65 3a 20 54 72 69 |ie is Blade: Tri| 00000930 6e 69 74 79 21 00 4d 79 20 66 61 76 6f 72 69 74 |nity!.My favorit| 00000940 65 20 73 6f 6e 67 20 69 73 20 47 65 74 20 4c 6f |e song is Get Lo| 00000950 77 21 00 3c 33 00 3a 33 00 47 6f 6f 64 20 6c 75 |w!~<3.:3.Good lu| 00000960 63 6b 20 63 6f 6d 65 73 20 69 6e 20 74 68 72 65 |ck comes in thre| 00000970 65 73 21 00 4d 79 20 66 61 76 6f 72 69 74 65 20 |es!.My favorite | 00000980 67 72 61 70 68 69 63 73 20 74 6f 6f 6c 6b 69 74 |graphics toolkit| 00000990 20 69 73 20 47 54 4b 33 21 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 | is GTK3!.......| 000009a0 Code doesn't need to be maintainable. Code is poetry. Could you add a mail client to anything written by Dickenson? Make your code unmaintainable and nobody will ruin it. /blah/2023-02-17.html Ayo. Who makes all they money off the key of C ED FUCKING SHEERAN Play more than four chords he thinks you're cray Z ED FUCKING SHEERAN If nautical nonsense ain't something you wish ED FUCKING SHEERAN Play Tenerife Sea and that pussy go hisssss ED FUCKING SHEERAN /blah/2023-02-16.html [0252] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: nyauseous at the idea of migrating accounts call that motion sickness [0256] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: brain melter let the soup run out your nose i want u to sniffle at the sight of me i want you to need another dose [0256] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: i need a sound cloud [2:58 AM] trinity: at night when the console cowboys have crashed and the fans fade to the soft whooshing of the liquid cooling [2:58 AM] trinity: and the only messages flowing through the ethernet towards the superhighway are those of tired overstimulation [2:58 AM] trinity: at every third message [2:58 AM] trinity: there is a tone [2:59 AM] trinity: leave a message after the beep [0326] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: noooooooo you're supposed to be the one barking for me [0327] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: post good girl clarity [0328] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: and the machine girl album ended at the same time I'll let you in on a little secret. I test my scripts maybe 6 times per line of code. Which sounds like a lot but I overuse pipes and logic operators so per actual unit or whatever of code that's like nothing. I am a rat bastard when it comes to software development. Hacking RSS onto my blah... And you don't seem to understand... Come on, fuck me emo boy! Antero - Office Robert [lastname] is a simple dude office guy whatever but it turns out his past self put him in the office to catch a crook or something. fun little plot twister that introduces the concepts of antero - Downward An addict spends all day whether or not to have another dose. Meanwhile, a couple decides whether or not to stay together, and Robert investigates a ghost in an apartment building. - Sisyphus Books are written, lotteries are won, dissidents are slaughtered, and Robert looks into cognitohazards being hidden on traffic lights in Melbourne. - Hell Robert doesn't make it out of a hostage situation gone horrifically wrong. - Heaven Robert's afterlife. - God Some kids mess around with electrodes and a brain they found on the side of the road. - Hamburgers Durmer Burger is built atop cheap land. I had a dream I could get human cadavers really easily so I got a shit ton and dissected like 20 in one go. Now we know what the yucky ah was are but I wanted to know what a stomach was because it was the 1800s. walk up to this bitch that I once dated say happy birthday she says it's belated fucker wear an eyepatch his dick's arr rated tellin me to step back 'fore I get castrated TRINITY RAP IDEA NO STEAL /blah/2023-02-15.html [...]: That's bad stuff, Trin. That could kill you. Trin: I dunno... We're naked sitting with our knees to our necks in the bathtub across from each other. We're in a bathroom in the castle, the walls are a desaturated lime green and the floors are an art deco style tile, each tile about an inch square and patterned in red and white into swirls and other spiral patterns. The bathtub is porcelain, raised off the ground. There's no spigot but there is a shower curtain that sits next to the thin window far off the floor. You raise your hand to grab mine, extend my fingers, hold your hand out and brush my fingertips with yours. You take a scalpel from nowhere and grip my finger but I don't struggle. You slice vertically through the tip of my middle finger. The blood runs down my finger to the end of my palm where it stains the bottom of the tub. I look at the stain on the tub, the pattern of the drops, but you brush my chin with your other hand and bring my gaze up to yours. You use my finger to paint from the center of your forehead to the tip of your nose, a line under each eye, under your lip until the end of your chin. My blood is clotting, you didn't cut deep enough. You lean towards me. I do the same. You whisper to me. I can't hear it. And you're gone. And I'm alone in a bathtub and a pond of red in a sea of white, and I'm cold and thirsty. Divorce speedrun. Jigsaw is a boomer. [0223] trinity@miniwa.moe: fediv erse!!!!!!!!!!! [0232] trinity@miniwa.moe: 3 likes i am so popular in fedivrse i am lik4e the 12 oz mouse of the miniwa dot moe [0233] trinity@miniwa.moe: catboy domsday plot 2 rul the state of new hampshr [0234] trinity@miniwa.moe: trinity wisdom look up pegging on yandex dot ru [0235] trinity@miniwa.moe: trinity wisdom bark for me ???? [0235] trinity@miniwa.moe: wait i meant !!!! [0236] trinity@miniwa.moe: ohhhh my god u are so hot do u havbe a microsoft xbox live gamertag msg me [0237] trinity@miniwa.moe: i will make the tweets for which james gunn was canceled look like an NHS press release [0315] 3@catgirls.nya.gay: i am so fucking swag i am the swag i am swag swag swag i am so swag did u know hey did u know i am swag cuz (be quiet this is a secret) (are u whispering) (get in close) hey hey i am swag hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii i am swag i am so swag /blah/2023-02-14.html 2022年03月11日 4RAGING!catz ウサギ- [picture of a dog girl eating a sandwich saying "mmf sandwich"] Today was a good day, and though I could remember it by what it _was_, I'll recall how I _felt_, and let you fill in the rest - Nervous Particularly when I tried the door and it was locked. What if it was the wrong day? etc. Anxious how do you spell that I didn't know how [...] policy was so I was worried I'd do something that was both stupid and catastrophically wrong Relieved When we actually started [...] Intriguiged [sic] When I saw everyone. By now, and BTW. Excuse the previous if it was cringe, I know the names of: - You - [...] - [...] (not the spelling but I'll take note next time) - [...] - [...] & that's it. I'm bad at names and face blind so give me credit. Last night I had Fritos for supper. Now, [...], [...], [...], on [...]. Pretty good. I don't remember what it was like to feel emotions. I worked both that job and my previous until I was sure I could do that job, then quit my previous job for that job. It paid very well and I miss a lot about it. I'm currently at the job after that job. And I thought so hard but I didn't suspect that there could be anything wrong with my head and you tried so hard but I didn't believe that there could be something so different about me /blah/2023-02-13.html catgirl 911, what's your emergency? hi, my catgirl seems broken. she doesn't feel anything. i give her lots of headpats and treats and she doesn't care Protein Olive stood making sandwiches when she heard something crash at the front of the restaurant. She walked towards the counter area to try to see what it was but saw the gas canister in the dining room, heard the hiss, and knew what it contained given that there was no visible smoke expelling out of it. She held her breath and ran around the table to the stairs as agents dressed in black broke through the windows in the front. After locking the door behind her she ran down to the corridor and opened the door marked Security, where she found a man dressed in a guard's outfit and stubble sitting at a desk on which there were a dozen video displays arranged in a square stack showing a dozen different views of the upper level of Durmer Burger being searched by law enforcement entities. The guard himself lay on his keyboard in a pool of blood next to his own sidearm. She ran out of the room and, knowing they weren't interested in taking prisoners, continued down the corridor to the ladder, down which she climbed. At the bottom of the neatly layed hole she found a hatch, which she wrestled open. Under the hatch was another ladder. She closed the hatch and picked a flashlight out of her pocket so she could see in the darkness. She saw the bottom of the hole a couple meters below her so she slid down on the sides and went through the door at the bottom. Olive now found herself in what seemed like a laboratory setting. The walls stainless steel, the floor featureless white tile. An ancient poster to her right welcomed her to the National Defense Center and illustrated the personal protective equipment she did not have that was necessary to survive her visit. She tried not to feel concerned and continued through the hallway to another door, this one looking like it had come from a hospital. She went through. The stench overpowered Olive and she nearly threw up. A nearly mummified dead body lay on the floor covered in old, dried, splattered blood, in front of a conveyer belt on which a machine periodically stamped blank wrappers with a Durmer Burger icon. /blah/2023-02-12.html PREM X BELLA: AN UNLIKELY ROMANCE Chapter One Bella woke up before the sun to her alarm, threw it against the wall, and went back to sleep. The next time she woke up the sun was blinding in her window and she realized she was either late for school or about to be. She threw her bedsheets to the floor, put a piece of toast in her Hello Kitty x Evangelion toaster, went to the bathroom and quickly brushed her teeth, put on her school uniform, grabbed the toast as it popped out of the toaster, put it in her mouth, and ran out the door. The sun beat down on the Shibuya streets. The cicadas sang and the birds tweeted, but it irritated Bella, who really needed to get to school. She ran to the bus stop but saw the bus drive off and decided she could run the distance, and broke into a sprint towards school. Prem, a student at the same school, meanwhile was leisurely riding its bike on a different street. It checked its Casio and knew it had enough time to get there, so it wasn't worried. Prem had pulled an all nighter making speed in its parents garage while they were out of town. Prem met an intersection, waited for the traffic signal, and then crossed. Meanwhile Bella was running as fast as she could towards her high school. At the same intersection she figured she could make it and ran across. Then she got to the corner past the street and ran straight into Prem on its bicycle. They both fell over onto the ground. "What the fuck?" Prem cried. Bella's toast was knocked to the ground and she caught sight of it. "Noo." Prem's bicycle chain had come undone. It took its repair kit out from under the seat and started to repair it. "I'm so sorry. I'm late for school-" "So am I, now!" Bella sniffed and tried not to cry. Not only was she late for school but in her rush had inflicted the same fate on another. "Is there anything I can do to help?" "No. Go away." Now Prem was the one that was irritated. Bella started walking and then broke into a run and ended up at school a couple minutes later. The teacher made her stand in the hall holding pails of water as punishment. Some time after that Prem arrived late too and, to Bella's surprise, ended up next to her. She whispered to Prem. "You go here too?" Prem whispered back. "Same class, moron." Bella had never noticed Prem. It had black hair pulled into a ponytail and was usually silent in the back of the classroom, either sleeping or writing down chemical formulas it had thought of. Meanwhile Bella was usually in the front of the class participating with the current discussion. Bella realized Prem was really handsome, too, but tried to ignore that. Prem had always noticed Bella. Bella was the pretty person in the front of the classroom with all the energy, occasionally interrupting Prem's thought with pointless interjections regarding the weather or school sports. They both were quiet for a beat or two before Bella whispered again. "Can I make it up to you? I'll buy you matcha after school." Prem replied. "I guess. But it better be good." And it would be a date. You can request chapter 2 through my Patreon, two months' of requests equals one chapter so if two people request in one month then I'll write it a month from now or if one person requests twice I'll write it two months from now. I need money. [10:17 AM] bella: the grindset lmfao. i respect it Theodore Castleberry woke up in bed next to his wife, Minerva. The sun shone into the sparse room through the curtains. Minerva still lay sleeping so before waking her Theodore silently slid out of bed and into the bathroom to pee and wash his mouth out. The clock said it was seven AM. After Minerva was awoken and the couple had breakfast that Theodore, known to his friends as Ted, had cooked - two eggs, some bacon, and some toast for each of them - and the newspaper had been read, and Minerva had showered, and the makeup and the deodorant and the day's plan had been discussed, Ted drove himself and his wife to their work, a small accounting firm that took contracts from bigger businesses when they needed more resources than they had. Minerva was filling out papers for a lawn mowing company that didn't expect an audit from the tax man. Ted was balancing out performance and paychecks for Johnson Corporate Networking, a computer company in the mid-21st century that grew into a laboratory and then left the computer field when that dried up. It wasn't interesting work but it paid the both of them enough to afford a house together and work breaks too, so an observer might say the two were happy. Ted, however, felt nothing. He stared at his books and penciled in number after number, and felt nothing about it. He felt nothing for his wife. He felt nothing for himself when he looked in the mirror. And he didn't remember when this started. Nor when he started working for JCN. Nor when he met Minerva or proposed or even the day before the current day. He knew how to push a pencil and he remembered how to do his math and he was content, for now. And when the bell rang and he went to lunch and he ate his soup in peace and looked at his wife who looked back with a love he couldn't reciprocate he knew he was lucky. And the bell rang again and he walked back to his desk. Today something was wrong. Ted didn't know what was wrong. But he didn't feel right. He felt really, really wrong. The lights, the paper, it was all wrong. He jerked his legs just to feel his muscle flex and felt his shoe hit a piece of plastic. Metatango "I wanna learn the metatango." Olive and Shepherd were walking the halls looking for something to do. Shepherd observed Olive. "The metatango? Where did you see that?" Olive pointed at a program she'd kept in her pocket. Learn the Metatango, with Señora Discorda. "I don't think that's such a good idea." "Why not?" " One does not simply do the meta tango." said Shepherd. "How did you do that?" " You must go now ponder the very tango." said Shepherd. "Are you singing?" " And if you must know the meta tango," said Shepherd, " you will have to discuss the very meta tango." "I don't quite understand." "I'll take you over to Discorda, but don't tell her you're with me, okay?" "But I figured the metatango would be, like, a dance. You just sang a couple bars about the metatango and the weird structure made me think it had something to do with what the metatango is. But I don't know what it is." /blah/2023-02-11.html Alliteration in news headlines is so corny. "Panic at the pump" is a dad joke, not a headline. I'm tired of all these meme phrases, I want meat and potatoes words. Tell me about the FNAF lore, shut the fuck up about some fake news epidemic. If everyone else is already talking about it I don't care because surely somebody else is already taking care of it. Tell me about a bug in some shell script you want help with or something (no seriously, e-mail me). Alright I'm tired I go sleep now. /blah/2023-02-10.html Every other line is censored When I was a very wee lass I was a very angry wee lass and spent my [...] an honourable pastime nor did it result in any fruits. Facebook wasn't it, [...] because I had 4chan.org/b tattooed on the back of my skull from creation, then [...] 4chan. [...] president was a petri dish in the eyes of some and a powder keg to others. [...] productive programming discussions and stuff, I didn't care about productivity, [...] nobody ever browsed mine and I never cared about anyone else's. So at cutie pie [...] and troll I made some funny jokes that got a lot of replies, and kept riffing, [...] Anonym had a rainbow so by the time I got back to checking that out again it [...] massive pizzagate-adjacent conspiracy theory. And when they took it to hachi I [...] firing squad. I made the first couple posts, no more. [...] referenced the joke I had made at that point a couple years prior. I realized [...] myself on the news every once in a while didn't cement it, didn't feel real. [...] Cardiotomy. Take my glasses off. Take the scrunchie out of my hair. Take my hat off and unzip my jacket. Tell me you don't care. Now kiss my bruised knuckle and brush my fingers with your lips and now extend my fingers and take the pliers from your hip and slide my fingernail out from its flesh holding cell. Gently make an incision and rip my bones out of their shell. Peel the seam up my wrist and watch my life flow out of me. Drill a hole into my heart. Dear [...]: The tomatoes are shit. I really tried my hardest to slice them and make them nice, but I'm not good at this and I don't know what I'm doing, so they came out like shit. I'm sorry. The pickles kick ass. I'm happy with them. But they took too long. The lettuce is fine. From Trinity I just need to get through this week. I just need to get through this week. I just need to get through this week. I just need to get through this week. I just need to get through this week. I just need to get through this week. I just need to get through this week. Dear automobile: Why dost thou haunt my weary soul? Roaring in your monoxide noise letting our your groans. Dear autombile: I'm left walking in your wake. Why don't you run me over so I don't have to come to work today? Dear automobile: Hit the gas. Hit the gas. Hit the gas. Hit the gas. Hit the gas. Hit the gas. Hit the gas. Hit the gas. Hit the gas. Dear automobile: RUN ME THE FUCK OVER P LEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JUST DO IT!!!!!!! It's a torture party and everyone's participating! /blah/2023-02-09.html Streambreak Prelude - Amber The discovery of the Ideal Human; Amber is the ubermensch of the 20XXs. Conspiracy theories immediately start to swirl regarding a drift from the ideal ("the fall of the West"-ish) with the legitimacy of early Q posts (i.e. no legitimacy whatsoever). Mix 2019-12 COVID knowledge with 2016 Q knowledge basically and you get the Amber phenomenon. Explores the actual (made up) science behind Amber, the realization that this discovery is sort of worthless, and the pickup of Amber by the right wing mobs and accusations of suppression etc. - Slipstream The thesis of the story; already drafted. Day 1 - Placeholder title Ambulance driver gets ready for work. - Ted's Last Day Ted's first building burned down, his work. An accounting firm working with JCN. Mention soup, barely mention JCN (just once), mention wife, go from his lunch break to ignition. - Placeholder title Reveal that Slipstream was just a narration of Ada's last [X] years to the coffee shop owner. Conversation about loss. Conversation about domestication - Ada's been basically working the same job for like a hundred years, how has she kept in touch with reality? - Placeholder title Follow Ted's wife out of the building into some stupid ass meeting or whatever. Why did she go with Ted's boss? etc - Placeholder title Meanwhile Ted is fighting the first responders to the office fire. Why are there so few responders? Steals a fire truck and fucks shit up, also brutally kills an ambulance driver, the one from the first chapter of this section. - Placeholder title Police get involved. The news hears over the radio and considers getting involved. Ted crushes the police and walks off. In-police bickering over how this could have happened. - Placeholder title News find Ted burning down misc. shit and interview him. Ted starts to amass a following. Ada finds this happening and doesn't consider it's important. Meanwhile Ted's wife (Minerva) and Ted's boss are doing things. Out of steam. And midnight's passed. /blah/2023-02-08.html If you had ghosts in your blood cocaine would totally work on getting rid of the ghosts. /blah/2023-02-07.html #!/bin/sh set -ex;mkdir -p blah;python -c "import os;os.chdir('blah') with open('../$0', 'r') as f: for day in f.read().split('\n\n\n'): if day.split('\n')[0] == '#!/bin/sh': prefix='\n'.join(day.split('\n')[day.split('\n').index( 'exit 0')+1:])+'\n';continue elif day.split('\n')[0][:4] == '<!--': suffix=day;continue with open(day.split('\n')[0]+'.html', 'x') as g: g.write(prefix+day+'\n'+suffix) ";cd blah;for f in *.html;do #in glob we trust test -z "$last" || sed -i "s,_NAVIGATION_,$nav<A HREF=\"$f\">\></A>," \ "$last";nav="";test -z "$last"||nav="$nav<A HREF=\"$last\">\<</A>" nav="$nav<A HREF=\"index.html\">^</A>";last="$f";done sed -i "s,_NAVIGATION_,$nav," "$last";for f in *.html;do #e unibus puellam fi="$(echo "$f" | cut -d . -f 1)";test "$fi" = "index" && continue printf '<A HREF="/blah/%s.html">%s</A>\n' "$fi" "$fi"; done|sort -r|\ sed -e "1i<!DOCTYPE html><HTML><HEAD><TITLE>blah</TITLE></HEAD><BODY><PRE>\ <A HREF="..">..</A>" -e '$a</PRE></BODY></HTML>'>index.html exit 0 That's the source code to this blog, in its entirety. My writing process was simple: - write the beginning and initial Python portion - pass out - wake up at 0600 not knowing who or where I am - see this code and continue it - pass out again - wake up at 1700 knowing who but not where I am - write most of the rest - pass out again - wake up half an hour later, finish It's organized in sections though it doesn't appear to be organized whatsoever: #!/bin/sh set -ex mkdir -p blah python -c " import os os.chdir('blah') with open('../$0', 'r') as f: for day in f.read().split('\n\n\n'): if day.split('\n')[0] == '#!/bin/sh': prefix = '\n'.join( day.split('\n')[ day.split('\n').index('exit 0')+1: ] ) + '\n' continue elif day.split('\n')[0][:4] == '<!--': suffix = day continue with open(day.split('\n')[0]+'.html', 'x') as g: g.write(prefix + day + '\n' + suffix) " This splits the blog into days, where each day is delimited by three newlines. Every day is two lines apart. A day that starts with the POSIX shell shebang is the /prefix/, which is prepended to each day. It cuts off everything until after "exit 0", the end of the script, and after that is the actual HTML prefix to each blah page. A day that starts as an HTML comment is the /suffix/, appended to each day. This obligates an HTML comment at the end of each post, the same comment, so I just made it something sort of interesting yet sort of bog standard. I explained this poorly but I spread the code out so it's a little easier to read, I think it's pretty simple. git.sr.ht/~trinity/homepage/tree /main/blog, you can see how it's laid out. Each day, prefixed and suffixed, is output as its own [day].html to the created blah/ directory. Next: cd blah for f in *.html do test -z "$last" || sed -i \ -e "s,_NAVIGATION_,$nav<A HREF=\"$f\">\></A>," "$last" nav="" test -z "$last" \ || nav="$nav<A HREF=\"$last\">\<</A>" nav="$nav<A HREF=\"index.html\">^</A>" last="$f" done sed -i "s,_NAVIGATION_,$nav," "$last" This replaces _NAVIGATION_ with an actual navigation bar. The actual string has two underscores before and after NAVIGATION but this blog is held together with shoelaces and bubble gum and I don't wanna fuck around and find out. I don't know how this works, I let my fingers handle the flow. (The secret is that I just run it in my head and adjust the beginnings and ends until it runs in my head for two times correctly. Then as long as state doesn't drift it's all good. This is fucky and I don't know how to explain it and I don't really know how it all goes about but you can do really complex but really really tight program flow just by vibing against it and letting your fingers tap tap tap, yknow?) Next: for f in *.html do fi="$(echo "$f" | cut -d . -f 1)" test "$fi" = "index" \ && continue printf '<A HREF="/blah/%s.html">%s</A>\n' "$fi" "$fi" done \ | sort -r \ | sed \ -e "1i\ <!DOCTYPE html>blah

.." \
			-e '$a

' \ > index.html exit 0 This takes all the files in blah/, builds an index, adds a prefix and suffix to the stream, and outputs it all to blah/index.html in one go. This is the simplest part of the script and I was worried it would be hard but it wasn't really, it just required a little bit of embracing of UNIX piping. ["Streambreak"]: After experiencing a genocide, Ada Karina time travels back to the past to prevent it from happening. However things start diverging from plan when a soup-fueled arsonist grows from nuisance to idol to geopolitical disaster. ["Antero"]: Tales from a future dystopia where the very formation of memories is outlawed. ["Sponge"]: Olive Edgerton is an employee at an impossibly popular burger joint, where every ingredient is grown or produced in-house. ["Saikokon"]: After an apocalypse, the last survivor is selected as an exhibit at Saikokon, a conference for psychic time travelers. ["Pasture"]: Tales from after the end of the world. /blah/2023-02-06.html 2022年03月02日ウサギ- I went to the dentist. No co pay. Hell yeah! My teeth are good. Still working on my taxes. I have a feeling I won't be giving you this journal. Maybe I will. It just seems like you're a bit distant. It's getting more and more embarrassing to wear a Soviet watch. Watching Peacemaker (2022). Pretty good. Saw the Blade trilogy. Pretty bad A couple days ago someone said "there's only a couple seconds left" at work probably about a cook time. Said I: "only a couple seconds left? I've gotta call-" And then I realized, for all I've done, I'm probably the first person of which nobody would think at the world's end. It's okay but it hurts. And that's of what I've recently been thinking My room is messy to a considerable yet probably easily remedable extent but I just can't bring myself to clean it. I don't know why. One of my old teams made the news for [...] attacks on [...] or however you spell it. Nobody knows how racist they are but I don't think it would change their public image. And the PR group is full of lamers still... Working 1130-2000 or something like that. Today will probably be bad but we'll see. Can always be worse... Double Junior Whopperless! Let's make that Hopperless! We are show stopperless Because we are so obvious! [unintelligible drawing] Burger Hell! [picture of a stick figure saying "12 fish"] [picture of the stick figure next to a square] [2 piles of 6 circles] [picture of a stick figure saying "done"] The customer came in and ordered 12 fish sandwiches. After they were made and sent out (which took fifteen minutes or so) they changed their mind and ordered 12 veggie burgers instead. We were left with 12 fish sandwiches. I considered taking them home and freezing them and having them for every meal for a couple weeks but I tried one and it was so bad I threw it out and told management to just throw them out. [3:40 PM] AllisonHell: sounds like an mcr song [3:40 PM] AllisonHell: pricking ink under ur skin thinking of meeeeeee - some Midwest emo [3:48 PM] trinity: i'm stealing that I'm strung out in my bed staring up at a screen that I keep on my wall playing fond memories and you're out at the stream sucking venomous things and you pick at your skin and you're thinking of me but I'm out and the light and the cathode ray beam and you're pricking your skin and turning it green and the red and the blue and the black and the pink and I can't think of you but you scream there for me Am I such a villain? Am I such a bleeding heart fool? That you can't cope now That you cut it and bleed out by that tool? Am I such a bitch now? That you can't deal with the pain and now you're gonna bleed out and now I'll carry all the blame [4:16 PM] AllisonHell: oh wow I cut myself on that edge Today I went to the whatever surgeon to see what my teeth were doing. Turns out they're being super mega bastards and the wise guys (wisdom teeth) are putting pressure on (impacting) the civies (molars) and if the situation continues things could get hairy (get fucked). So now I need $2500 to get my wisdom teeth out. Time to pawn all my shit! I have to figure out my insurance but the dentist said my non-wise teeth are rad and kick mega ass so that's nice. /blah/2023-02-05.html 2023 already? if i were a dog i would like to eat dog food food,if i were,would i?eat dog to like a dog food,if dog were,would dog? eat like i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i ___ _ | To be honest, I don't think I would survive a | / \ | day in Hell. It seems too hot. I was born and | |\ /\ \ | sorta raised in Maine so I'm used to the cold | | \ \ \ \ | - the kind of cold for which others make you \ \| ||_|| | pay an arm, leg, and the tips of your ears!!! _\ \ \ \_/ / \___/ \__/ I know this is word salad I just like it when the line endings match up. > The only safe thing to do was put bands in your top eight so there was no > drama. > But I liked the drama. Enveloped in flame Lex, for a brief moment, remembered playing video games when he was a kid. He sat on the floor in front of the television holding a game controller - affected - and played a garbled mix of polygons and pixels. The room caught and the television was on fire. He was on fire. The TV stand, the game console, the couch behind him, the cat. The TV went out and he was left holding a controller that wasn't quite right and melting onto his hands. His clothes were covered in flame. He threw the controller on the ground out of disappointment and opened his mouth to speak and crumpled into ashes, and remembered nothing more, ever. /blah/2023-02-04.html [...]: I stand corrected. Trin: Don't stand corrected. Kneel. I hope Hell has good ice cream flavors. Y'all won't see this for a while, I'm rewriting the blah stuff and making a markup format for it (fuckscript). /blah/2023-02-03.html 2022-04-26 Miss You Already Hey Trin!! I'm gonna miss you so much! I hope you excel at everything you do!! - Love Drew Bye! - Miranda We'll miss you!!! - Kaylah Bye. Rita We'll miss you trin! Good luck with your new job! - Kim Best of luck - [unintelligible] Good-Bye From All of Us Good Luck :) - Lee Gonna miss you + the [...] - Peter That job gave me such bad stomach issues I ate like only yogurt for a week to adjust. Three of those seven signateurs left that job in the next six months. I had been there eighteen months, long enough to go from severe incompetence to actually knowing what I was doing. At my current job I again consider myself incompetent. But I work with what I'm given. "More money more problems" is total bullshit. More money is only more problems if you're too afraid to slice and dice a little. If you wanna take the edge off you're gonna have to fuck around with an angle grinder a little. Just looked up what an angle grinder is. I didn't actually know, the name is just metal and the words are sort of iambic. Sarin is so OP. I'd name a kid Sarin. 2022年02月22日ウサギ- [picture of a dog/cat thing on a windowsill] tomorrow we're watching American Psycho (2000) Today I work 1130-1700. Tonight I'll pick up some snacks and clean my room a bit. It's messy but I don't think it's beyond saving. [picture of the burger king] Just trying to cover up the bleed-thru. Sitcom ["Pilot"] S1E1 The fellas throw Trinity a surprise 9/11 celebration. ["Trauma Wars"] S1E2 During a Phineas and Ferb reenactment, Trinity throws a game show where the player with the most childhood trauma wins. ["The Long Shot"] S1E3 Trinity and [...] come up with a plan to get raises. ["Codebreakers"] S1E4 The fellas break the Hayes code. ["Wings"] S1E6 Trinity tries to convince her friends to star in a television pilot about celebrating 9/11. "Prove to me that you're human." "Excuse me?" SUBJECT: PHIL MANEKINO AGE: 35 "Prove to me that you're a human." "I don't have to prove anything to-" DISINCENTIVE APPLIED. "Prove to me that you're a human." Phil shifted in its chair. "I- I have a wife-" "She too is in questioning." "-a family-" "So are they." "-so what's in question? My whole life?" "Prove to me you're not a robot." "How? Why?" I sat back and emitted a sigh. "Your latest medical examination revealed no hypertension, pre-hypertension, cavieities, abnormalities. You have no criminal background of any kind. No unusual lookup patterns on the Intranet. Thus, you must be a robot." "I'm a robot because I'm clean?" "Nobody's clean in such a dirty world. Your dirt must be deeper than skin." I selected the dremel from my toolkit. "Oh god, no, please." The usual pleas. "Prove to me you're not a robot." "Why are you doing this?" DISSECTED FINGER: HUMAN. "You're a cuborg?" DISSECTED ARM: HUMAN. I dismantled the robot made only of human components and from these and my experience compiled my report. Family must be, too. Operator congratulated me before turning me off. on my usual stupid bullshit 2022年02月22日ウサギ- It's today again. Perhaps it was today yesterday, or it's yesterday today. It doesn't really matter. [picture of a stick figure sitting at a table, saying "where am I?"] I remembed in elementary school I was in the "Gifted[...]" program - [...]. Apparently they formally I.Q. tested me but I don't know that anyone outside the program (or myself) saw the results. We read advanced reading books, did more complicated maths, etc. I preffered [sic] the middle school [...] teacher, [...], to the elementary teacher. Less strict. Anyway, I got the feeling it was a doomed program. Lack of funding, lack of interest. Of course the public controversy around such things. But hey, it got me reading Shakespeare in like fifth grade. A Midsummer Night's Dream. Not my favorite of his. I didn't really enjoy my childhood. [...] Life was simpler. Better? No. Much worse. But I like simplicity. [...] [...] trinity@laika:~ $ curl wttr.in/?m Weather report: [...], Maine, United States Overcast .--. -26(-38) °C .-( ). ↘ 22 km/h (___.__)__) 16 km 0.0 mm Hell's dress code is this: - shirt, pants, intimates, et cetera; base layer - jumper - jacket liner - jacket - bandanna to cover face - hat - jacket hood, pulled tight - chunky ugly really warm gloves - leg warmers good enough to go to the gas station. any farther and you will die. One fortune cookie, two fortunes: Don't stop dreaming, otherwise your dreams will get awfully boring. Be smart but don't show it. /blah/2023-02-02.html Jesus it's cold... I gotta move someplace warmer... like Hell... Applied for my passport today. I called the cab company at 0730 and they said they'd sent a cab as soon as possible. Then at 0755 the cab arrived and, knowing the trip would take like 15 minutes, I told the cabbie if they got me to the post office to apply for the passport by 0800 I'd tip them $20. Four minutes of extremely haphazard driving later I was down $33 and on time for the appointment. It took like five minutes to actually apply because I'd already filled out all of the paperwork so I was out of there and at work within the hourish. Good times. Kingslayer by Bring Me the Horizon ft. BABYMETAL goes so fucking hard. Like, so so hard. The mosh pit for the song is also usually fucking kickass. I wanna be a kingslayer! It's fucking cold outside. wttr.in/?m says this: curl: (92) HTTP/2 stream 0 was not closed cleanly: INTERNAL_ERROR (err 2) Accuweather says this: [-8 deg C] The forecast for Friday (tomorrow) afternoon says -10 deg C with 32km/h winds ("RealFeel": -23). Saturday afternoon -16. "RealFeel" -31. If it gets any lower I'm gonna have to set the thermostat to Kelvin. Jack Frost is a son of a bitch. My -->ANECDOTAL<-- caffeine knowledge is this. Tolerance is built up gradually. 80mg might stim a househusband, 300mg might barely be enough to keep a prole awake. Cup of coffee is between 40 and 80mg. If you're drinking coffee you might as well crank it up to however strong you want. Most people don't need caffeine, they drink coffee because of peer pressure and it feels good at first but eventually the tolerance takes over and it has basically no effect. You have to have a really long tolerance break to actually reset your tolerance, it's not worth it to go on a break unless you're trying to quit. CDC recommends like 400mg max for a healthy adult, 500 is a good amount to actually get work done, at like 600-700 (varies per person) you just get wacked out and don't accomplish anything. 1000-1500mg puts you in a state of euphoric zen if you have a strong tolerance and literally kills you if you don't have a tolerance. 2000mg kills you or a horse, both if portioned carefully. If you overdose you're super mega fucked and painfully so; muscle fuckiness and brain fog. Drink like 2L of water, piss, repeat until you start to feel okay, the residual effects you have the day after will follow you for the rest of your life. Monster 300 is like the highest caffeine potency you can get in an energy drink so if you wanna consume caf either homebrew strong ass coffee (boil a pot down to a cup or something) or spend like $20 on Monster and enjoy ketoacidosis. Caffeine kills for realzies so don't overdo it and listen to your doctor. THIS IS MY EXPERIENCE ONLY. DO NOT CONSUME PAST WHAT THE CDC RECOMMENDS. DO NOT SUE ME FOR YOUR OWN IDIOCY. As far as I know, and as much as I should, say that the powers that beckon are good, I have to admit that they've broken a lot of promises better to better and not one of their oaths has been filled, just forgot. They just make more work to do and then do it and stop the betters from bettering and raising the top of standards to better than there was before the powers that beckon took hold of the floor. Scott pulled back the bolt and the AA battery spit out of the side of the rifle. He reached in his pocket and grabbed another one, pushed it into the chamber, made better aim, closed his eyes, fired. The blast burned a hole in his sight even through his eyelids but other than the temporary optical degradation he was unharmed. His target, however, subject to the full power of a 3Ah battery spent in half a second, had a hole burnt through his suit and through himself. Then he felt a pinprick and knew a sparrow's talon, another of his generation's angels of war, with its thin tungsten shaft and dainty uranium barbs, had gotten lodged in his back. He turned around and shot the offending kid with a Glock. I'm standing in an empty parking lot snow is falling from the sky it's such an empty parking lot, now snow is falling from the sky I held the car door handle snow started falling from the sky I sighed and got my baggage handled snow started falling from the sky I'm standing in an empty parking lot and snow is falling from the sky I'm smoking a nearly finished cigarette and snow is falling from the sky I opened the car door and I turned and asked you why and you said there's nothing to remember snow is falling from the sky [...]: You should fuck Bs instead of As because Bs have two holes. Trin: What does that mean??? [...]: Another one is, 'you should go fuck yourself with a T because it has a handle. Trin: No, seriously, what does that mean??? Earl of I.fel a tell vis but I don't remember why. Earlier toupe I felt a tell visio but I don't remember why. Earlier today I felt like a television but I don't remember why. Ear er to I felt like a elevi on but I don't remember why. E r r o I felt like a lev on but I don't remember why. E r r o fel on but I don't remember why. after monster #4: hiiii after monster #7: hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii /blah/2023-02-01.html What I had for breakfast today: A strawberry Oreo milkshake. Half a cigarette. What I had for supper today: Chicken nuggets and a burger. The other half. What I'm drinking: Vermont maple spice tea. And Dayquil. Now playing: Painkiller - Nothing But Thieves. Jason walked up the cloud to the pearl gates of Heaven. God stood at the door in front of a lecturn with a massive book. He (as in He) spoke first: "Name?" Jason paused. "Oh. I died there, didn't I?" God curled His lips into a frown. "Did you think you would live?" "No, I guess I knew I would probably die." "Was it worth it?" "Yeah, I guess. It was what needed to be done. I wish I didn't have to die that way, but I suppose that's how it is." God thumbed through the pages. "At what day did you leave?" Jason told Him. God found the day. "Hmm. That's interesting." "I don't know much about this religious stuff. Honestly I thought it wasn't for real. But didn't you write that book?" "Do you remember everything you've written?" "Well, no." "Exactly. I forgot about this section. And to be honest-" God winked at you "-I'm probably as much of a character as you are, Jason." "Why did you ask me my name if you knew it?" "You're the only one that dies like... that. That day. I'd say you're the worst death there." "Fucked with an angle grinder." "Yeah, fucked with an angle grinder." "I was hoping if You existed You'd come through for me there. Like a 'deus ex machina' sort of thing, y'know? Maybe I didn't have enough faith." God looked into the distance behind Jason. "Honestly, I wasn't really listening that day." "No fucking shit! At least everyone else made it out okay because of me, right? It was an honourable death?" God looked back into the book at the next couple pages. "Hmm. Yeah. Yeah, that's pretty honourable." "That's good." Jason leaned on the other end of the podium. "Can- can I see Jane?" "Jane? There are a lot of Janes." "My wife. She made it here, right? Oh, wait - can I get in? Into Heaven?" "Yeah, sure, you've earned it. But your wife isn't here. Or in the other place. Your wife's on Earth." "What? No." "Yeah. Jane used the cash she'd been slowly building up to buy a plane ticket to Kazakhstan and retire." "Fuck." "Yeah." "Really?" "Yeah." "Fuck." "Well, you'll have a lot of time for relationship stuff up here, so, like, have fun with that." "Fuck me, man." The gates open and Jason started walking through before pausing. "Y'know, times were hard." "Yes, yes they were." "Like, really hard. I don't think I was ever really happy, y'know? I never got anything like that. The best I got was a fucking character arc like this is a comic book or something. That kind of felt unnecessary, y'know? The whole fucking me over again and again? I don't think I needed that." "Perhaps." "Per fucking haps. Y'know what? Where were you? Why did you write me like that? My life has been fucking torture. Why did you do that to me?" God kicked Jason and he fell over past the gate threshold. The door to Heaven slammed shut, and God locked it. [...]: Welcome to Hell. Trin: Great to be here. /blah/2023-01-31.html #!/bin/sh set -e # UNIX manual system str isvalue "$MANUAL_DIR" \ || MANUAL_DIR=/usr/manual argv0="$0" ! str isvalue "$1" || str isvalue "$3" \ && printf "Usage: %s [name] (section)\n" "$argv0" 1>&2 \ && exit 1 \ || true str isvalue "$2" && ! test -e "$MANUAL_DIR/$2/$1" \ && printf "%s: %s: No manual entry in section %s\n" "$0" "$1" "$2" \ 1>&2 \ && exit 1 \ || true str isvalue "$2" \ && PAGE="$MANUAL_DIR/$2/$1" \ || for d in "$MANUAL_DIR"/* do test -e "$d/$1" && PAGE="$d/$1" done ! str isvalue "$PAGE" \ && printf "%s: %s: No manual entry\n" "$0" "$1" 1>&2 \ && exit 1 \ || true ! str isvalue "$SECTION_DIR" \ && printf "%s: %s: No manual entry\n" "$argv0" "$1" 1>&2 \ && exit 1 \ || true <"$PAGE" groff -t -e -mandoc -Tascii trick or treat girl's gotta eat i'll bark for u just please pay me just grab me by the bezel and make me wish i was more than a screen. please? 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[...]: No? Trin: No. [...]: I believe that. And that's fucked. (starts laughing) Trin (still laughing): I feel like I'm going insane. [...]: You do? Trin: Not really. I already went insane a while ago. [...]: It's the new normal. Trin: Yeah. We're all insane around here. It's still Tuesday? I had a dream: I was in a private art gallery admiring the paintings. Then it turned out there was a warrant out for my arrest. They'd found something extreme enough to warrant throwing a smoke bomb through the window in front of me. I noticed it wasn't really clouding anything so knowing it was probably some nerve agent I ran to the door and gated over to a fractal of the world in which I'd been. Some SWAT agent or something saw me open the door to While that transpired I forked and gated over to the MoMA or whatever in Manhattan. Some cars with black tinted windows rolled up from both ends of the road so I sprinted across the street into ongoing construction where I was shot and killed. Worth a try. a place to which that doorway didn't usually go and sprinted through along with me. I ran through the gallery, which was this rich guy's beautiful townhouse, and made it upstairs where I got onto the roof. The SWAT didn't know I was there so I jumped down and made it into a nearby forest. One for two. [2:59 PM] Strong Eminav_B (weak): I was expecting you to look older and a less round face [3:09 PM] Strong Eminav_B (weak): The way you describe ur life makes me picture you like that before and after image of that ww1 soldier What are you wearing? I dunno baby, whatever you want... Carhart pants. Loose fit jeans but I'm considering tighter fit because it'd make them easier to pack. Black. Carhart shirt. Loose fit. I take a razor and cut the Carhart logo off and it's just a 100% cotton shirt with a pocket that I know will last me a while. Black. Amazon "athletic sleeves". Tight. Black. Some eco whatever hat. Keeps headlights, rain, and hair out of my eyes. Black. Carhart gloves. Spandex. Well fitting. Black. New Balance 686 boots. Everything-proof. Pink shoelaces under all the grime. Black. Casio F-91W. Black. On occasion, a bandanna tied around my neck or hair. Black. Dickies socks. Black. Intimates. Take me out to dinner first. Even then you'll probably never see them. A Hello Kitty scrunchie. Silk, maybe? Satin? Shiny. Kawaii. Not black. Glasses. Rose colored. [3:32 PM] trn1ty: yeah it sorta be like that [3:32 PM] trn1ty: blackpink [3:32 PM] trn1ty: cutepunk trn1ty started a thread: trinity fits thread. See all threads. Yesterday at 9:24 PM [9:18 PM] trinity: they're gonna study my work after i'm gone but idk in cs or in psychology [9:19 PM] sasha: in cryptozoology treat me like your computer i wanna do all your math take me apart for techno school show all the pieces to your class grab me by the bezel make me glitch the fuck out tie me up in wires call me a bitch and make out treat me like your computer like i'm a video game play me with your friends from school but don't tell me their names unplug me from the ether so i can't surf any sites take your hard drive out from me leave me on a shelf and go outside Rothco M-65 mansfield jacket. Sturdy. Black. Aside from my weird thing recently it's been months since I've felt much emotion. My emotions and I are apart, for the better I think. They didn't do a lot of good for me and I didn't do a lot of good for them. Good riddance. Most of the people I know don't feel emotion. The rest of the people I know with which I've brought this up think this is horrifying. I don't think so. The people I know with emotion left are either priviledged or at one point had it in a way that is to me unimaginable. The rest of us had to grow up. I remember being scared the first time I saw Night of the Living Dead. I haven't felt fear in years. High school, the earlier years probably. Maybe my caf OD did something. Maybe there's only so much fear you can, and I did. Maybe... There is no pausing, there is no remembering, there is no recoiling. When things go bump in the night you get a rifle, when people die you walk past them, when everybody is dead you step over the bodies and on them if necessary. And I'm tired but not tired enough. _ _ []-[]-' :(){:|:;};: ... ---| --|- --|| -|-- -|-| -||- -|-| -||| |--- |--| |-|- |-|| ||-- ||-| |||- |||| /blah/2023-01-29.html Fuck! I don't remember typing that. I got like 8hrs last night and the same the night before! The previous nights 2-3. I started a Patreon. You don't get much for it, just a custom role on feeling.murderu.us, and only on the Discord bridge. My Raspberry Pi is actually really goddamn fast. I put a cheapo Amazon passive heat sink + fan on it and now it stays under 60C without a problem. raspi-config(8) doesn't let you trigger the fan any lower than that for some reason or I might keep it at 50. Look at this mess: if [ "$INTERACTIVE" = True ]; then TIN=$(whiptail --inputbox "At what temperature in degrees Celsius sh[...] else if [ -z $3 ]; then TIN=80 else TIN=$3 fi fi if ! [ $? -eq 0 ] ; then return 0 fi if ! echo "$TIN" | grep -q ^[[:digit:]]*$ ; then if [ "$INTERACTIVE" = True ]; then whiptail --msgbox "Temperature must be a number between 60 and 120[...] fi return 1 fi I don't like this. I really don't like this! I'm gonna rewrite raspi-config(8) today. Fuck it. /blah/2023-01-27.html NPR: <https://text.npr.org/1151374507> Headline: "Nearly all U.S. mass attackers were male and faced major life stressor, report finds" Content: "...Nearly all the attackers experienced 'at least one significant stressor' within five years of the attack..." What?? Who *has not* experienced a significant stressor within the last five years? These analyses don't compare the demographic to the average or median, just sensationalize useless numbers. This is somewhat cherry-picked but the rest of the article also sucked. I read NPR for my pseudo-left Capitalist news. I used to read CNN but I would get irate at misleading headlines. I checked for some to lambast (ooo I'm becoming a True Blogger "lambasting" my perceived enemies I'm so cool) but couldn't really find anything that stuck out so maybe I'm remembering it as worse than it was. Still, most of these headlines can be filed under "who the fuck cares": "Ukraine's new tanks won't be the instant game-changer some expect" but they're still useful so who cares "Here's how family and officials who have seen the video of Tyre Nichols' arrest are responding to the footage" probably they don't like it because he got shot or something who's Tyre Nichols "Quarterbacks in the NFL playoffs are getting younger. Here's why their age is important" who cares about the NFL? "US Marines officially opens first new base in 70 years on island of Guam" USA propaganda piece "After 3 years of Covid, CNN went into rural China for Lunar New Year. Here's what we found and how officials tried stopping us" probably officials knew CNN fucking sucks ass and were trying to stop them from ruining people's fun. article exploration time! the article was incomprehensibly boring and just explored COVID-19 stuff in rural china. the tldr is rural people don't care because they didn't really get great treatment during the onset of the pandemic so anyone who would've died did and now it's just a thing that goes around. i didn't read much of the article i'm just describing my rural town because rural towns are the same fucking everywhere "China still wants to control Big Tech. It's just pulling different strings" anti-China propaganda piece. this could have been titled "the Chinese government still wants influence over Western technology companies, trying different methods" but that wouldn't be biased or completely fucking stupid. can you tell I hate CNN? I could go on but my doctor (drug dealer) told me to watch my blood pressure so I'm gonna have to chew an aspirin (drugs) to calm down (get high). 私を殺して street racer at twelve no sidewalk. street's soaked in ice take me somewhere nice Note to self: mail Jared <https://soundcloud.com/cementcity-1 /fallen-angel-cement-city-cover-panty-and-stocking-with-garterbelt-ed> [...] [12:06 PM] tebicat: I read this and imagined a human organ hooked up as an hid or something [10:05 PM] trinity: like that person with the pinball thingies surgically added to their brain or whatever and could be put into agony by pressing a button [10:05 PM] trinity: what are the pinball thingies called [10:05 PM] trinity: SOLENOIDS [10:06 PM] trinity: EE teacher called them pinball bumpers [10:07 PM] trinity: cyborg but the augmentation is easy facility for torture [10:07 PM] trinity: ping ping ping AAAAAAAAIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEE [10:10 PM] trinity: in hindsight i should stop engaging with severely fucked up events [10:10 PM] trinity: i feel like all my random anecdotes are like hey i watched a person die that way I'm not a very good leader. Today at work one of the people in my [...] threw a bitch fit because I put them on menial labor most of the time rather than the meat and potatoes of our job. A real bitch fit that made me pause what I was doing for a couple seconds to tell them to shut the fuck up, but then my superior called them into their office so that they instead could tell them to shut the fuck up - I technically have no authority to tell anyone what to do but people listen to me because I'm the one with the most experience. "I'm gonna throw a B.F.! A bitch fit!" ~ a friend of mine I'm not a very good leader. The issue is that I don't really feel that whole empathy thing or anything like that. Not only can I not imagine what my subordinates (this sounds like total dogshit but bear with me because this wording is the best I have) are feeling but when they verbalize their feelings there's not much I can do to understand or care because I barely have discernable emotions besides {confused,typical,hyper,tired}. My solution to most things is to get someone doing menial labor because I figure if they're stressed out they should do relaxing small jobs rather than the soul crushing eternal big job. I don't have much to add because I don't care that much. When dogs bite send them outside. Otherwise as long as they can still walk put them on the leash and make them exercise. /blah/2023-01-25.html Trinitisms: It's not preferable to drink from plastic. I was really pleasantly surprised to see people's caring about microplastics hit the mainstream. This is half about that and half just that I don't like the texture of most plastic things relative to metal cans or glass. Except straws, I love straws. Now reading: <https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychochemical_warfare> Service: Soundcloud - trn1ty I had a dream last night I was walking in my neighborhood when this bald eagle swooped down to attack me. I happened to have a baseball bat with me so I hit it in its chest and it fell down on the ground. Then I beat it until it stopped moving and when it was dead I woke up. Band name idea: sourdough starter. Trinitisms: Don't put ice in beverages that aren't water, or they'll get watered down. I made this joke at work until everyone was sick of it and then put it on my website because I myself was not yet sick of it. Trinitisms: Don't think, feel. And you'll be tanasinn. Trinitisms: A string is an array of characters. I hate, hate, hate, HATE programming languages that don't let me index strings as if they're arrays. Or make me jump through hoops. C is perfect. Trinitisms: More magic is necessary. Referencing the famous magic / more magic hacker fairytale. Trinitisms: The only good programmers are the insane programmers. I miss you, Terry! Trinitisms: If less than one half of the packaging is in a non-Latin writing system, the noodles will be sub-par. I think I came up with this in high school. I prefer Shin Ramyun and use a Sunbeam Hot Shot to heat the water, the same since I started. I used to have a couple a day but now I rarely have that ramen. I can get a meal from a local Chinese restuarant and stretch it out to last me 3 days of meals. 辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛辛 I hope this Unicode works because it's tofu with the default xterm(1) font. I can't sleep. When I close my eyes I can see the inside of my mind. [2022-01-08T0128] trinity: proprietary vendor, proprietary problem Howard, what is flau x4c? Cassidy met Ada at the coffee shop for the second time for the second time. Ada spoke first. "How's your morning going?" "Fine. Weird, but fine." "Weird?" Cassidy smiled. "I screw dials into watches, that's my job. It smells weird. I just realized there's all kinds of dust in the air." Ada grew pale. "Dust in the air?" /blah/2023-01-24.html How to make lysergic acid diethylamide (LSD) 1. [...] [...] in [...] with [...] to get [...]. 2. Activate the [...] by [...]. 3. Extract the [...] and [...]. Easy! Trinitisms: "Disc" refers to optical and physically impressive media, such as compact discs or phonograph discs, and "disk" is for magnetic media, such as floppy disks or hard disks; there are however exceptions and edge cases. I probably didn't coin this one but rather came up with it independently, observing the use of dis{c,k} between "optical disc" and "floppy disk". I'm still not sure if this is the actual rule. Trinitisms: catfella - the non-gender-specific form of "catboy" or "catgirl". (coined 2020-08-11 when referring to my friend Socks) Also in use (though not a Trinitism): nyanbinary. Socks is so cool. I don't know what they're up to now, probably kicking ass somewhere on the net. I was a moderator on their short-lived Discord server which had like a million messages in #general alone after like three months. I met them on TikTok because we both had comparable follower counts and everything; I left TikTok and eventually all social media and they and everyone else stayed behind. Socks made the most realistic purring noise I've ever heard a person make. Sent SMS to [...] at 2023-01-21T00:19:22-0500: bloomberg terminal that jerks you off when your stocks enter the red Trinitisms: The continents shall be separated as follows: North America, South America, Eurasia, Africa, India, the middle-East, and Oceania. Though I hope someone important finds individual terms for each America and has a better name for the middle-East if each region's residents generally agree with me that the current naming kind of sucks. I talked to a friend of mine about this but I don't remember where. Not Discord. Maybe SMS? My SMS logs from history are totally toast. Trinitisms: 39 - "Thank you." In Japanese the word for 3 is "san" and the word for 9 is normally "kyuu" so 39 is pronounced "sankyuu". Trinitisms: Antarctica is cool, both literally and figuratively. The same friend with which I discussed the continents harbors Antarctica as a special interest and told me stuff about McMurdo Station which is cool as all fuck. Maslow has nothing on me. 1 ___ 2 ______ _____/ \ 3 ________/ \_______/ \__ 4 / \______ 5/ /blah/2023-01-23.html Adventures in nmcli(8): Secrets were required, but not provided. Rebooting didn't work. Futzing didn't work. Config didn't work. Disabled MAC address scrambling (already was disabled). Rebooted WiFi router. Rebooted machine. Worked. Rebooted. Didn't work. Rebooted. Worked. Rebooted. Didn't work. Rebooted. Worked. Hardware fault? What I'm reading: Wasson, R. Gordon, Ruck, Carl, Hofmann, A., The Road to Eleusis: Unveiling the Secret of the Mysteries. Harcourt, Brace, Jovanovich, 1978. PING 1.1.1.1 (1.1.1.1) 56(84) bytes of data. 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=1 ttl=54 time=5332 ms 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=3 ttl=54 time=4710 ms 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=6 ttl=54 time=1913 ms 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=7 ttl=54 time=2131 ms 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=8 ttl=54 time=6488 ms From 192.168.2.105 icmp_seq=20 Destination Host Unreachable From 192.168.2.105 icmp_seq=21 Destination Host Unreachable From 192.168.2.105 icmp_seq=22 Destination Host Unreachable 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=9 ttl=54 time=15077 ms 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=10 ttl=54 time=15891 ms From 192.168.2.105 icmp_seq=23 Destination Host Unreachable From 192.168.2.105 icmp_seq=24 Destination Host Unreachable From 192.168.2.105 icmp_seq=25 Destination Host Unreachable From 192.168.2.105 icmp_seq=26 Destination Host Unreachable 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=11 ttl=54 time=15621 ms 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=12 ttl=54 time=14801 ms 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=13 ttl=54 time=13844 ms 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=16 ttl=54 time=10823 ms 64 bytes from 1.1.1.1: icmp_seq=18 ttl=54 time=8812 ms Awesome! ME: 'Sup. JOHN: Nothing much. How about you? ME: Oh, you know. JOHN: What's going on? ME: Well, I'm alive, so things aren't great. JOHN: Oh. PURPOSE BUILT TO BE DISARMINGLY CUTE Now playing: Killing Me Softly - Roberta Flack Based! on sodium bicarbonate. in a spoon with a blowtorch Antipsychotics | \ | _\| V Dopamine -> Neurotransmitters -> Chemical Synapses -> Synapses Psychosis _ ^ ^ |\ | | \ _ Serotonin | \ /| "Bewitchment"_\ / |\ \ LSD -> Ergot <- Claviceps purpurea \ \ ^ / ^ \ \ | |/_ | '-\------- Ergotism <------|-- Hosp. Bros. of Saint Anthony \ | '-+---------- Eleusinian Mysteries | ^ \ | '-- Philosophy <- Plato [...] [8:36 AM] segismundo: so, an anti psychotic does the opposite to LSD [8:37 AM] segismundo: meaning that LSD is, by definition, a "psychotic" [...] Just as Land smoked methamphetamine, Plato drank of ergot-infected kykeon. Philosophy is an application of psychosis. [...] [9:48 AM] meatgrinder #1 meatspinoza: Fantastic --- 1.1.1.1 ping statistics --- 837 packets transmitted, 99 received, +229 errors, 88.172% packet loss, time... rtt min/avg/max/mdev = 39.220/30595.549/353683.940/40902.931 ms, pipe 307 /blah/2023-01-22.html Internet's out, repo's not cloned here, guess I'm writing this in a separate text file. This blah really is just a single large HTML file I edit (most of the time). I might start splitting it up but then I don't get to read previous stuff as I write. A lot of my revision process is just taking something I've written, copy pasting it into a new doc, and rewriting it word by word into something I like. It would be a lot harder to do if it was all separate text files. Honey, where did I put my arsonted_06.txt? I have a job I never really talk about here because I don't really like working and don't see why I should write about something I don't like. But my co-workers vaguely know of the existence of this blah so I figure I'll mention that. At least at this current job they do. Don't move up, move out. I make sandwiches. Fast food. It's no honorable occupation. xterm(1) is a program I really enjoy despite it technically being hot garbage. Someday maybe I'll fork it and fix it while keeping support for everything but probably not. maia arson crimew is so cool. I'd like to implement Fing for UNIX but better. It's definitely possible even in Just shell scripting. nmap(1), ping(1), etc. Immediately I'd like to write a history of pagers and some documentation for raspi-config(8). /blah/2023-01-11.html "Sounds like a pretty one-sided relationship." "Well, yeah." Ada Karina had finished her brief account of a story that spanned decades. "Forty five the first time... back twenty three years from that... then how old?" "Oh, I uh- thirty. Even, I think." "Eight years. So fifty three. Then you were thirty five, another thirteen. That's sixty six years?" "I guess." Ada checked her watch. "You're twenty three now. That makes you eighty nine." "I guess." Howard tapped his fingers on the recliner. A church bell rang in the distance; noon. The cafe would close in an hour. He thought to himself. "Older than me." "Not physically. Mentally I feel like my brain's on fire. Probably I won't last much longer up in my head. But it helps a lot that I'm twenty three by all observable quantities. And really it's more like I was trapped in a simulation three times rather than that I actually time travelled." "How was it?" "How was what?" "You spent- eighty nine, twenty three - sixty six years working towards a relationship. I mean, no matter how good Cassidy is, is it worth it to go that long?" Ada thought for a moment. "For a smile? For a hug? Of course. and it kills me that it's gone." She laughed. "Yeah. It just kills me." Ada turned her head to look outside at the table at which she met Cassidy the second, third, and fourth times. Howard Polk had been the owner of the cafe for the previous two years. He wondered if he'd be alive for the holocaust, if Ada couldn't prevent it. He looked at his knuckles resting on the worn cotton armrest. The burns he got as a cook at someone else's establishment decades past never healed, not on his knuckles and not on his neck. "I lost someone too, once. The last person I cared about. Actually cared about." "May I ask who?" Howard snorted. "Yes you may. The co-owner. Margeret." "Margeret." "Best damn cook I knew. Taught me everything I know. Everything." "What happened?" Howard scratched the recliner fabric and felt the texture. "We went our separate ways, or rather, she went her separate way, getting bored of the business or the routine or something. I texted, called, messaged back when instant messaging was still new. And she sent me a message saying it wasn't my fault that she didn't answer and that she was going through a rough patch." Ada turned back to Howard. "What happened?" "She washed up on the shore of the Nile." "Fuck." "I still prefer it to what you said. Even if I don't quite believe it." A timer went off in the kitchen area behind the counter in front of which Howard's recliner sat. Ada watched the cook bend down out of sight and return to view with a pan of bacon. "I wouldn't believe it either." /blah/2023-01-09.html 1000 lines since the last Ted story? Minerva and Ron sat silent in the car. Ron focused on driving while Minerva frowned at the horizon. "We should have stayed there and made sure he got help." "Help? What help is there for him? It's a miracle he didn't end up killing anyone. I know it's my 'duty' as manager to make sure the store's safe but the guys'll fill in everything for the cops and EMTs and Ted'll get put away in a place where he can't do more harm. That was a traumatic event, Minerva. I want something to take the edge off and I wanna forget the fire and Ted ever happened." Minerva looked at the steering weel. "That's not a healthy coping mechanism, you know." Ron stared into the horizon. "Oh, fuck off. If you thought any differently than I did you wouldn't have gotten in the car." They started to accelerate. Ted had been watching the second building burn that day for probably half an hour before he heard footsteps in the brush behind him. "You rat bastard!" Ted turned around to find a police officer with his gun already drawn. "Oh. Hi. Are cops allowed to swear?" The officer's hands' tremble was slight but visible. "Ted." Ted read the officer's name tag. "Jack?" "Tom. Tom Jack. You were at my brother's Christmas party." Ted remembered a Tally Jack with which he worked. Tally invited Ted to his Christmas party about three months prior and Ted at the time regretted showing up. Being beaten with blessings and suffocated by songs playing in background commercials. Every present had a logo and everybody already knew the brands. Ted was the odd one out, as usual. "Tom." "How could you? You could have killed all of your co-workers - why burn down the office? You could have killed my brother." Tom's voice quivered. Ted tilted his head and thought for a moment. "Nobody died. Would have been cooler if they all did, yeah." He smiled softly. Officer Jack, now angry, gripped his gun with both hands. "I could arrest you, and the judge would give you a sentence, but that wouldn't be justice. If you got out you'd just do this again, wouldn't you?" Ted nodded. "Me killing you right now is justice. To Hell with the consequences." Ted stood and watched the officer staring into his eyes but only reciprocated in the same way a doll or teddy bear makes eye contact. Without presence. "So." Tom exhaled. "Goodbye." Tom braced for Ted's reaction. There was none. Tom squared his soldiers. "Okay." Ted finally reacted. "Car." "What?" And then it hit Tom with all two tons of force; an ambulance driven under the influence. Its brakes squealed but the tires couldn't catch the dry grass and the ambulance sucked Tom under where he was run over by all four wheels before being spit out on the other side ten seconds from death and with his top ten most vital organs all perforated in one way or another. "Man." Ted watched the light leave Tom's eyes as the ambulance driver staggared out of the vehicle. Tom in terms of presentation wasn't too gruesome, though death did have somewhat of an effect on his composure. It struck Ted as a boring dead body. The driver put his hands on the sides of his head. "Oh man, oh man, oh man..." Ted was surprised he hadn't been the one hit but then remembered he didn't care, and that the ambulance driver wasn't on fire. "Can you hold still for a second?" The driver paused and looked at Ted. "...What?" Arson Ted is my favorite character. /blah/2023-01-08.html What I found in Flipnote Studio 3D for my Nintendo 3DS: - 2019-09-25 0646: 9 frames. Bouncing ball demo. - 2019-10-11 1736: 28 frames. Bouncing ball demo (the ball is liquid). - 2019-12-16 1304: 30 frames. The word "FUCK" turns into strings and falls onto the floor. It recollects as a heart with "YOU" in the middle. - 2011-01-01 2110: 60 frames. A stick figure falls into the ground and (likely a clock leaves an impression in the snow; climbs issue) out. Letters appear above them: "SOVIETS WITHOUT A PARACHUTE (tm) - 2011-09-30 1004: 4 frames. A stick figure masturbating. (likely a clock issue) - 2020-11-09 2257: 55 frames. A stick figure waits at a dinner table holding a fork and knife, wearing a bib. Another stick figure slides a dish to the other end of the table. The first stick figure looks down and their mouth extends into crocodile-like jaws before they take a bite out of the entire section of the table with the dish. The second stick figure extends their mouth likewise and smiles. - 2020-11-10 2302: 2 frames. A small drawing of a teddy bear next to the shaky words くまちゃん: 「ACAB」. - 2020-11-16 1746: 2 frames. Words on top of a flashing yellow and white background: i <3 LOOTERS. Today I tried playing Professor Layton and the Curious Village for the Nintendo DS. It was too hard and I've given up. Half the puzzles are total bogus (you have one match and want to heat your bathtub, start a fire, and light your lamp; which do you light first?.. your match). The story looks good and I like the FMV cutscenes. Maybe I'll find an edit of all of them on-line. I rediscovered Paper Airplane Chase (DSiWare) which I had when I was a very small child on my DSi XL. I played it a lot and enjoyed it but now it looks to me like it's probably an asset flip of some part of another game. Maybe WarioWare? In total people owe me $545. I'm hoping I can get that by the time next month's rent is due. /home/trinity/Pictures/the_end_of_the_world.webm (2021-03-04 2104; 3991 KB; origin unknown) 00:00: A picture of Tim and Moby from MobyMax. 00:00: A picture of Captain Underpants. 00:01: A picture of a Nintendo Wii. 00:02: The poster for Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules (2011). 00:02: A screenshot from PAPA's TACO MIA. 00:03: A picture of a kid with outstretched hands displaying Sillybandz. 00:03: Bodycam footage of an officer shooting a figure in the desert. Dated 2018-10-10 1454. 00:04: Video of a police officer shooting a man in the street. The police officer behind him is held back by a bystander. 00:04: Video of a TSA agent searching a child for weapons. 00:05: Video of another TSA agent searching a toddler in a wheelchair for weapons. 00:06: A screen capture of a computer system using facial recognition to track school class attendance. 00:06: A screenshot from a TSA body scanning computer. 00:07: A Department of Defense press release showing 3D render of an "active denial system". 00:08: Footage from a massacre at a mosque in Christchurch, New Zealand. 00:09: A screen capture of a computer system tracking the positions of students at a school. 00:09: Footage of a police officer pulling a police canine off of a figure. 00:10: A picture of a poster at a school. Visible is a yellow smiley face with "Smile" above and "You're on camera!" below. To the right visible is the following fragment: Our new bus you have a sa We have pros and graffiti on (italic) You are being (italic) bus. So just sit WE WILL P OR 00:10: A snippet from Sunday Today with Willie Geist, headline: JEFFREY EPSTEIN'S DEATH LEAVES ANGER AND QUESTIONS. /blah/2023-01-07.html 2022-05-04 Orientation Olive arrived the next day at 9 o'clock antemeridian having been informed of the time she'd start work two hours prior via electronic mail. She entered the restaurant via the two sets of glass double doors and walked to the counter. "Hi, I'm Olive, I'm here for my first day of work here." The kid at the counter looked like they hadn't slept in weeks. "Hi Olive, I'll go get the manager." They disappeared and returned from the back of the restaurant which didn't seem to be lit, accompanied by a man Olive hadn't met. He grimaced in an attempt to smile. "Hi Olive. Usually Paul would be here but he's out sick." "Sick? I spoke with him at length yesterday in his office – should I quarantine?" "No, the only thing of Paul's that was contagious was his smile." The man grimaced again. "Come with me, I'll show you the kitchen." Olive, lead by the new supervisor, followed into the dim kitchen, lit by a single red-tinted bulb. Another kid, apparently lacking more sleep than the first, stood at a tall stainless steel table on which four machines sat. On the far right was the paper dispenser; it dispensed paper wrappers for the burgers, operated by button press. The bun dispenser, operated by lever, deposited refined-grain sesame seed buns of 12 centimeter diameter, the bottom landing on one corner of the paper and the top landing on another. The patty dispenser, operated by plunging lever, was a conveyor belt that lead to the kitchen from nowhere immediately discernible to Olive. On metal wires it would push patties, two at a time, to the table. The final machine dispensed an orange mixture (that smelled like cheese and ketchup) and was operated by flip lever – flipped one way, it dispensed enough syrup for one burger, flipped the other way, it dispensed enough for another. Shik-shik, puk-puk, hrnnnnn, click. The kid at the table made two burgers at a time before wrapping them and sending them out. Next to the table, on the red tiled floor, was a bucket of waste. Olive gestured to it. "Do you do composting?" "Oh, no, of course not. We need to count out waste. How many burgers tossed, how many buns tossed, et cetera. We've had issues with employees stealing product." "Oh." Olive stared in the bucket. It held a soup of cheese/ketchup, grease, mushed bread, and dissolving wrappers. "You count out everything in there?" "Yup, that's not exactly my favorite part of this job." The supervisor turned to the table kid. "Daniel, this is Olive." "Hi Olive." Daniel turned back to his hell. The supervisor turned back to Olive. "You'll be replacing Daniel. Watch how he works so you know what you'll be doing." Olive kept staring in the bucket. "Do you have any sort of official procedure sheets?" "Yes, but you aren't allowed to see them." Olivia's eyes moved from the bucket to the conveyor. "Oh." That was OK. Here's how I'd write it now: Orientation Olive arrived the next day at 900 on two hours'notice. She entered the restaurant via two sets of glass double doors and walked to the counter. Holding the register was a teenager who looked like he hadn't slept in weeks. Olive read his nametag. Sam. "Hi Sam, I'm Olive, I'm here for my first day of work here." "Hi Olive, I'll go get the manager." He disappeared into the back of the restaurant, which Olive noticed was lit dimly if at all, and returned with a man in a black uniform. The man grimaced in an attempt to smile. "Hi Olive. Usually Paul, the manager with whom you spoke yesterday, would be here, but he's out sick." "Oh. Should I be here then? The interview was in an enclosed space and for a little while." Sam brought out the bag for an order as they talked. He pulled a receipt off a clip hanging from one of the shelves behind him, strafed over to the soda fountain, and started pouring drinks. A set of hands pushed a burger onto the other shelf and then receded back into the darkness. "No, it's not contagious - fortunately. Plus the restuarant is very well ventilated. The only thing of Paul's that was contagious was his smile." The man grimaced again. Olive noticed the use of past tense. "Come with me, I'll show you the kitchen." Olive, lead by the supervision, stepped behind the counter, between the two stainless steel shelves, carefully through a brief corridor between shelves holding room-temperature ingredients, and followed around the end of the shelf on the right to the small kitchen which she noticed was lit by a single red incandescent bulb. Another teenager stood at a waist-level stainless steel table onto which four machines dispensed paper wrappers, sesame-seed buns, beef patties, and some sort of sauce. Four tubes ran to the table; two from the floor and one each from the ceiling and a refrigerator-sized machine behind the kid that had a large steel tube chimney vent also routed towards, eventually, the sky. The kid at the table made a sandwich in a rhythmic beat. Shik-shik. The paper dispenser was a box sort of shaped like a printer with a large black button that used the mechanical force of the button press to separate and spit out the burger wrapper. The box extended past the edge of the table and a large stainless steel tube extended from its bottom through the floor. The papers had red splotches on them, like there was an accident in printing. Puk-puk. The bun dispenser was a tube that ran down from the ceiling towards the table with a lever on the front. The lever rotated a gear inside the tube so it could dispense a single twelve-centimeter sesame seed bun, fluffy enough to not be damaged upon hitting the bun wrapper. Hrnnnnn. The patty dispenser, operated by foot pedal, was a conveyer belt within a thick tube that carried a freshly-broiled hamburger patty; the Durmer Burger signature patty, in fact. It came pre-seasoned. Click. The sauce dispenser resembled a sink faucet, with a tube a couple centimeters in diameter running from a valve in the floor under the table to the hook-shaped dispenser section. On the front it had a flip lever - flipped one way, it dispensed enough syrup for one burger, flipped the other way, it dispensed enough for another. The large handle made a gentle but audible click as it toggled. The signature Durmer Burger sauce was orange and smelled to Olive like a mix of cheese and ketchup but she figured it would be naive of her to assume that was all it was. Shik-shik. Puk-puk. Hrnnnnn. Click. Then he wrapped them and pushed them through the shelf into the light behind it. Next to the table, on the red tiled floor, was a bucket, a third full, of various decomposing ingredients. Olive pointed at it and turned to the manager. "Do you do composting?" "Oh, no, not here." He chuckled, which came out as a low growl. "We count out waste to make sure the inventory sums out. A couple years ago we had some problems with an employee stealing a ton of stuff from here so it's just in case it happens again. Probably not really necessary but it's what the higher-ups want." "Oh." Olive stared in the bucket. It held a soup of sauce, grease, the remnants of some buns, and slowly-dissolving wrappers. "You count out everything in there?" "Yeah. Not exactly sunshine and roses." The supervisor spoke a little louder. "Daniel." The table teen, presumably Daniel, looked up from making sandwiches. "This is Olive." Daniel looked towards Olive's knees. "Hi Olive." He turned back to his table. The manager turned back to Olive. "You'll be replacing Daniel. Watch how he works so you know what you'll be doing." Olive kept staring in the bucket. "Do you have any sort of procedure sheets anywhere?" "Probably. I've only seen glimpses. They keep it under wraps. This is more sort of a word-of-mouth, creative job. You do things the best you can." "Alright, cool." I don't like chocolate. /blah/2023-01-06.html 2022-05-04 Interview Olive set herself down on a blue chair with stainless steel gray legs that grasped a red tiled floor thinly but strong enough at least for her right then. The weather outside was beautiful, a clear sky with few clouds, and the sun would rise in an hour, though Olive could see none of this because the cramped office in which she and her chair were captive was windowless. The silence was set to the beat of Olive tapping her jeans with her nails and looking at the, to her, very large vent next to the flickering fluorescent light in the suspended ceiling. The cheap desk in front of her wasn't very big but still barely left room for her against the wall, on it was miscellaneous unsorted paperwork. This was the first, most potent memory Olive would have of her time working for Durmer Burger. There came two knocks at the door and it was ajar. The lead manager, Paul, smiled with nearly all of his teeth before pulling it open. "Olive, is it?" "Yes." Olive stood up and held her hands at her sides, intending to shake Paul's hand if he offered his. He didn't and simply sat down behind his desk. Olive sat down as well. "This is an impressive resume. You volunteered at the humane society for two years?" Paul's salt-and-pepper hair stuck out under a brown DURMER WORKER hat. "Yeah. I had some spare time and wanted to help out." "Good, good. I see you did take some cooking classes at school. You might be able to teach us a thing or two. I know our kitchen can be a little strange to new hires but I think you'll get along fine." "I hope so." "So do you want to stay in the kitchen, or do you want to take orders? Maybe a little of both?" Olive looked at the desk for a moment before looking back at Paul. "I think starting out in the kitchen would be good, but I don't know." "Alright, kitchen, then play it by ear. Sounds good." Paul put on a sickness of a smile and reached out with a bent elbow to shake Olive's hand, which she followed. After Olive left the room Paul leaned back in his chair and began to seize. Foam fell from his lips onto his gray uniform. The chair fell over to Paul's right side, to the door, and Paul hit the side of his head on the doorknob as he fell onto the floor while his chair scuffed the beige wall behind him. As his blood dripped slowly onto the tile the fluorescents finally gave out. Neither the kitchen crew nor the order takers heard Paul die, though Sam, who usually was relegated to the fryer in the kitchen, noticed the light was off while sneaking out to the dumpster to smoke a joint of marijuana. He knocked, asked the order takers where Paul was, and continued out through the back entrance to the dumpster. On his way back he noticed Paul's car was still parked outside the entrance. Sam checked both bathrooms (each empty) and opened the office door ajar to see if Paul maybe was taking a nap on the clock. That's when Sam found the body. After Olive left the room she walked out of the restaurant through the front entrance, looked up and down the street for traffic, though there rarely was any, and crossed Canal Avenue over to the Chinese buffet where she turned right and started walking home. She watched ambulances and a police car fly down the road and didn't see any significance in it. Paul's shoulder was mostly holding the door shut but Sam could see the drool on the floor. He ran away to the front and told the order takers, who called the local emergency number. Two ambulances and a police car stopped in the drive-through and brought out a stretcher, some paramedics, and a police officer. While the paramedics took care of the body the officer questioned first the order takers and then Sam, whom the officer noticed was high. Officer Daniels didn't make a note of it. On a computer screen somewhere (anywhere) in a factory a worker watched a man seize and die on closed circuit television. He picked up a telephone and dialed for his superior who was on the same connection. The superior went down to the worker's office and stared at the still conveyor belt behind the worker, on top of which neatly laid a number of burger wrapper papers. The superior asked what the worker was doing and the worker explained that a man had just died inside the burger store (Durmer Burger). The supervisor stared at the press, then the employee, then the ink buckets that lay beside the press peppered with warning labels regarding the composition of the ink. The supervisor considered how hot the ink had to be to be in a liquid state. Then, silently, the supervisor grabbed the employee by the ear and violently threw them into the red tank. The employee opened their mouth to scream but only music came out. The most beautiful music the supervisor had heard. It came to a crescendo as the worker's face dissolved and they lost consciousness due to shock but it played on even after the employee's decrescendo. Red splattered onto the burger wrappers. 2022-05-04 Recomposition "Hey." A figure in a black trenchcoat, wearing green circular glasses a bit too big for their head, tapped Olive's shoulder as she lay on the road foaming at the mouth. "Hey Olive. Wake up." Seeing that Olive was dead, the figure started walking down the road backwards, facing Olive. When Olive's body flew up and started walking backwards towards Alan's the figure crouched and continued sneaking, staying out of Olive's field of view. This figure watched Olive make her way backwards to the gas station and eventually made it behind Durmer Burger as Olive shuffled backwards towards the ground outside the broken door and lay down in front of it. Olive flew into the door and the glass beads on the ground arranged themselves into a full sized window pane. The figure waited a minute or two on a mechanical wristwatch before heading towards the front of the building. All was quiet in the neighborhood. No birds chirped, no squirrels rustled trees, and there were no cars on the street. The figure in the black trenchcoat retrieved a black purse from their belt, took out a tension rod and paper clip, and started to pick the lock. Within a couple seconds they got through and held the door open. Soon Olive came running out of the portal. "Hey." Olive clutched her arm and turned around. "Hello?" Her face was twisted in pain. "Hi, I'm here to invite you to Saikokon." The figure smiled with a few more teeth than fit a human. "It's free!" "Saikokon?" "Yes, yes. It's quite a surprise, isn't it?" Olive looked around her. "What?" The figure frowned and put their purse back on their belt. "Alright, well, I'll take that as a yes, which isn't quite consent but otherwise in a couple minutes you won't be able to either way. I'm gonna need you to hop on this scooter." They took a small, collapsible Razor scooter out of their trenchcoat from a strap across their front and unfolded it. "It's a bit shabby but I don't like cars' emissions." Olive stared at the scooter. "I'm sorry – this is a lot to process. I need medical attention." "Yes, I know, and either you can pour some isopropyl alcohol on your arm and die on that street drooling or you can get on this scooter and go to a clinic. So which is it?" Olive stepped onto the scooter. Her foot was barely small enough to fit on its platform, leaving no room for the other. She adjusted her weight to balance. "Great. Now, I'm going to have to ask you not to puke. This is going to be extremely disorienting for you. Would you like a blindfold?" "What?" "A blindfold. It obscures your vision." "Why would I want a blindfold?" "In case of inadverdent motion sickness or blindness." "I could go blind?" "You could always go blind." "Will this increase the risks of my losing my sight?" "Olive my dear," the figure grabbed onto the middle of the scooter's steering apparatus firmly and steadied themself, "you have never seen." The figure started slowly walking, dragging Olive along, both through space and time. I'm writing this at 0400. I can't sleep. I didn't sleep much the night before this, or the night before that, but I just can't. I can't sleep. I'm not tired, except I'm a little tired - I just yawned. But I'm not tired. I can't sleep. I'm so tired. I don't want to sleep but I need sleep. But I can't sleep. I can't sleep ! and I'm awake and I've been awake since noon? I can't remember and yesterday I still only slept maybe a couple hours for which I am thankful but I need sleep. And I can't sleep. And heavy is the head that wears the crown; heavy also is the head of the insomniac, the bitter dead-wake hound that howls in its gutty pain and makes mortals fear its cosmically lucid mind that can strike upon them an understanding so great they too will never sleep again. Never rest their head on a pillow, never lay in sheets, never breathe a great calming breath. They too can't sleep like I can't sleep. Why can't I sleep ? Why must I never sleep but stay on guard and on edge and listening to the rustle of the vents and automotive traffic on the street behind me, past my window? Maybe I can sleep but it's the world that stops me. Maybe I halt the world. I don't care. I just want to sleep ! I need to sleep ! Let me sleep ! /blah/2023-01-05.html 2021-07-07 Antero A person woke up wrapped in satin sheets, head atop a comfortably stuffed pillow. They remembered the two most important things: Take the pill. Check the book. The book. Where was the book. Their room came into view. A wallpaper of lilacs on a cream background. Large windows, nearly floor to ceiling. The book was to their left. June 1, 21XX. Ah, the first of a new month. Funny how that happens. They quickly flipped to the front. EDWARDS Eugene \ Class: Well-to-do. Ah. Well-to-do. Well in-deed. The last thing Eugene Edwards remembered was sitting in a pub in, oh, what year is it now? 21XX. So 40 years prior; sitting in a pub, having a pint of whatever happened to be on tap at that point. No televisions. No televisions at the bar. There were people on phones though. Eugene watched them, thinking. Kids on their phone. Is it a phone? Are they still phones nowadays? Fuck it. Phones. Just about the same anyway. The kids were on their phones scrolling through memetic imagery like a hundred years prior back when lead and fluoride and Donald Trump and quantum computers and oh god think of the children were on people's minds and when those were the only just about the only things on people's minds no cognitoviruses no hazards just green grass et cetera. A hundred years prior. Eugene wasn't there, nor were Eugene's parents, nor grandparents. Eugene's great grandparents were alive though. Given the plastic content in the grandparents' bones, Eugene figured the times were not great. But maybe they were okay. They could have been okay. The concrete age. Eugene was watching them on their phones. Whatever the fuck those hipsters used. And Eugene watched the kid on the left, or the right - the one farthest from the exit - Eugene watched them drop their phone, suddenly, and tense up. Like getting electrically shocked. All their muscles tightened, their face got red, their veins got big, like Rob Muscanis doing a dead-lift. Then the kid passed out. Passed the fuck out. Then the same thing happened to another kid and slowly as the kids checked what was on each others' phones it rippled out. Cognitohazard. That was what it was called. A memetic cognitohazard. Sweeping the god damn planet. The Indians and the Koreans both denied it was them immediately though they were under the closest scrutiny; India in particular had been known for trying to manufacture cognitohazards for military use. And all this investigation (in the wrong places) while it took kid after kid. And killed them! A fucking memetic image. That night was when Eugene learned about Antero. Antero is an experimental (now not so much) drug aimed at preventing the formation of new memories for 24 hours after ingestion. It's usually taken in the morning; available to every class and every body free of charge from the government not out of nefarious purpose (though that is questioned daily by a number of folks more than suspicious of the UPK's leadership) but out of a great need. Without Antero, fuck. Antero turns the permanent death of a cognitovirus into a temporary absence from the brain of the user. Antero is the penicillin of the twenty second century. Thank your local god for Antero, then thank the drug company that came up with it, Gokko (pronounced "gohk koh") Pharmaceutical. Then, of course, thank the Japanese. Eugene took their first Antero the following morning, and by the looks of Eugene's book of short term memories gone long term gone gone, Eugene had taken Antero every morning since then, for the past forty years. Well, thirty-six years technically, thirty six years, three months, and a day. Eugene figured most people would be afraid to wake up forty years older (especially given that Eugene was just about reaching UPK life expectancy of sixty-four). However, Eugene did not have emotions; Eugene was technically a psychopath. Though this word is antiquated now and will be far more antiquated by the time this story occurs; psychopathy is not a real diagnosable medical condition, rather a collection of common attributes, and the term is hampered by a very strong connotation that psychopaths are violent and compulsively homicidal. Eugene was neither. Eugene's book was written in a somewhat different way from their usual writing. At least that's what they figured at first look. On first glance, the entries were scrawled quickly and looked dirtier than their usual work (or their usual work of forty years' prior). Done so to save time, probably. And the entries were bulleted and abbreviated. "I went out for dinner with Laura. She seemed happy and has just gotten engaged to the kind-hearted and hearty mutual friend of ours Brian." becomes simply "dined with laura. now eng. w/ brian"; "laura" and "brian" both hyperlinks to the relevant written profiles within Eugene's book (mentioned entry dated January 8 and both profiles updated automatically with this information at the same time). So, what to do today. 21XX-07-01. Go to work at Rogo Corporation. Job is to supervise the automatic production of electric machetes and rapidly debug errors. At nine hundred hours, attend meeting determining scope and cause of formula errors in accounting department, and consequences. Okay. Eugene got out of bed, went to the bathroom, brushed their teeth, and did other usual activities similar to one does in the bathroom. Then they put on a tight-fitting black collared t-shirt, light and thin dark blue jacket, and black jeans, and walked downstairs to hail a cab to the tallest skyscraper in their city. "Memes", viral thoughts, have existed for millennia. As the time taken for a thought to circumnavigate the world decreased, the sheer amount of memes increased. The printing press, telegraph, telephone, television, all accelerated the travel of memes. However, the mass popularization of the use of the Internet mainly through the world wide web in the early twenty-first century predictably spawned an unprecedented environment in which memes could form, pass through the minds of millions of people, and die, in the span of hours. This was the perfect petri dish in which cognitoviruses could evolve. Cognitoviruses, or memetic cognitohazards, are self-propagating mind worms that often interfere with the capability of the subject's brain to accomplish tasks necessary in order to think. The first cognitoviruses were temporarily distracting and rather harmless; for example, a game where, whenever one thinks of it, they lose, which is in turn unwinnable unless the subject never knew of the game in the first place, but of which the subject is compelled to tell others, is a very classic example (and one that was popular on the Internet through the mid 2010s). As research into the phenomenon of cognitohazardous materials and the memetic transmission of cognitohazards evolved, cognitoviruses were developed and published that began to circulate through popular communicative Internet services, and soon became a "meme" themselves. It was in the late twenty-first century that a cognitovirus was developed that was, more or less, lethal, and theorized to be the work of a state military though the true origin is uncertain. And Antero sat as a published paper and niche-market drug, usually applied in the treatments of mental illnesses such as post-traumatic stress disorder or depression. In the week following the release of the first lethal cognitovirus the usage of communicative Internet services plummeted, meanwhile Gokko Pharma's valuation increased fifty-fold. And so the world kept spinning. Antero. Eugene needed to take the pill. They were halfway down the stairs from their rented living space before they remembered and had to walk back up. On the other side of the bed from where their book was. A blue bottle with white cap; inside, a dozen or so green pills. Eugene dry-swallowed one and went back down the stairs to the street to find a driver. This is not nearly my best writing. I thought 七月 was June, the description of Eugene is so bland yet so pseudo-edgy. I like that Eugene uses gender-neutral pronouns but that was because of my misunderstanding of gender in which I thought such a thing was ridiculous and everybody should be neutral. I like the idea of memes as weapons and still think about it - I used to do stuff like that (and that's all I can say about that). But I think this style of narration sucks and the world described was excessively bland - intended to be British but without much subtle charm that colors the otherwise gray world of England in media. It's nice that my writing's improved so much in 18 months - or maybe I'm just not divorced far enough by time from what I write in this blah to see the glaring flaws. I'm gonna have to put pipes at the start of the next one's lines because it's reliant on the structure of the text - I can't just indent each paragraph and shove it together to indicate relation between segments like I can when I put random snippets of writing in here. 2021-08-12 |Anonym's journey to the center of the universe | | began on 31 september 2021 in the town of little rock maine. anonym | went to a big franchised or whatever drugstore to buy a coca cola. then they | went to check out but they noticed no registers were open. yet the store was | still open, and there was a worker there striding around the registers | | "hi, I'd like to check out please" anonym | Worker: "Yes, that's for what I'm here." | "well, ah, where should i pay for my cola?" anonym | Worker: "Please use the self-checkouts." | "i don't really understand how to use the automatons" anonym | Worker: "Yes, that's for what I'm here | I'm here to show you how to use the self-checkouts." | "alright" anonym | | anonym learned to use the automatons to complete transactions | | "so, what do you think of coca cola? what sodas do you like?" anonym | Worker: "I don't know. I drink any beverage." | "you don't have a preference? even something you like more than others?" anonym | Worker: "No." | | anonym left the store and continued their journey to the center of the | universe That one was basically just a transcript of an interaction I had at my local CVS. I hate my local CVS. 2021-03-05 The Journey Kenan Gleick woke up on a Tuesday morning, in a town neither you nor I have heard of, Michigan, to a soft roar emanating from outside the room in which was the bed in which he'd apparently slept. He recognized neither the bed, nor the room, nor the view outside the window, nor, upon putting on the clothes in the mahogany bureau next to the bed (business-casual khakis, a pair of sneakers, and a black "Thanks for the toast!" tee shirt) and looking up at the mirror above the bureau, himself. He pocketed a cheap multitool on top of the bureau. He knew who he had once been - a cashier at a local supermarket - but it didn't seem relevant to who he was now. His palms had worn since he'd last seen them. He crossed the hardwood flooring and opened the white door before entering a hall, painted a diseased maroon, to find what appeared to be a handyman or some other sort of contract laborer grinding through the drywall with a rotary saw. The man turned off the blade and stared at Kenan. "That room was just empty." "Sorry." Kenan quickly walked into what was marked as a stairwell and treaded down the stairs until he came to the sign indicating the ground floor, where he broke into a jog and quickly made it outside the hotel before anyone could ask any questions. I remember thinking about this one but I don't know what it was gonna be about. This is also probably the earliest piece of writing I have saved on my computer. There are really old ones that maybe I'll dig out at some point but I've already pasted three here for today and I can only bear so much embarrassment at the writing of my 17 year old self. The trinity.moe/blah chronological cut must be so confusing to watch! I found an ancient blog of mine from when I was a kid. 2016-04-09 Today we didn't have school because it's Saturday. I went to one of my friend's birthday parties, [...]'s, to be exact, and I got him a Nerf Elite Dual-Strike. It was a Nerf party, by the way, and it's no mystery of whether Han or Greedo shot first. I did. I also met up with my (old) friend, [...], and shot him. It was kinda boring today altogether though. 2016-04-11 School was nothing special today. I've been trying to think of a YouTube video to make. I've been getting vlogger's block. It's weird. Also, I heard of something I think everybody should check out - a petition asking Blizzard to stop trying to sue Nostalrius. Sign it! Please! 2016-04-16 I didn't post anything for the week, since I was so busy with school, but now it's April vacation so I can blog all I want. My favorite Minecraft server, play.prxcraft.net, is shutting down on the 20th. 2016-05-24 I've been busy this month. It's just too much, especially with volunteering and all the other crap our school makes us do. Meh. Another day, another blog. Another Weebly site to watch is AnimeFreak. Weebly's doing something stupid so that entire sentence was linked. Enjoy. EDIT: I linked the word now. Just the word. DEAL WITH IT. Somewhere along the way, probably inspired by Paul Graham's blog, I learned it's less interesting to write about what you /do/ (unless what you do is absolutely fascinating, which most of the time it is not) and more interesting to write about what you're /thinking/. About a month after these I started on a webcomic which had the writing quality of CtrlAltDel and a slightly better art quality than Arson Comics. It had various unfunny jokes about virtual reality (which I had not yet tried), self driving cars (which did not yet exist), arcade machines that could play every video game ever made (which I didn't know existed), and the usual violence-as-a-punchline, a hallmark of 00s and 10s webcomics. My favorite webcomics were xkcd (which I discovered at the time Vodka was published - 2015-05-22, I guess) and MegaTokyo (which I discovered on xkcd's site footer). MegaTokyo taught me leetspeek and a ton of weaboo culture, and I still love the common fantasy of being stranded in a metropolitan area and being forced to just Figure It Out. Later I also read TwoKinds, Savestate, Junior Scientist Power Hour, and others. I would be thoroughly shocked if I found anything older than 2014 that I could paste onto here. My life only really began when I turned 18, anyway. /blah/2023-01-04.html Karl and Will watched Captain James Cook sit in his recliner, seeming to deliberate. An intravenous line was slung over the armrest from the back of the chair into Cook's arm and he sat, catatonic, drool dripping past his bottom lip, eyes wide open. Both of them knew he neither cared about what they said nor was physically able to hear them. Behind them a small porthole window let them see into the depths of outer space. Will finished his thought and verbalized it. "So, like, what's he thinking about?" Karl: "What?" "He's on tranqs or something. Is he thinking about the ship?" Karl turned to Will. "Are you new here or something?" "What! I'm just asking a question." "Did you go to school?" "Yeah." "Did you graduate?" "Well... no." "Yeah." Karl gestured to the thin tube. "That's a drug cocktail of both stimulants and paralytics. The chair measures his vitals and keeps him alive while he can use all of his brain to think about what moves to make next." Will reexamined the chair from where he stood. "Why can't he just think normally?" "I just said. He can but this lets him use more of his noggin. The dude is basically doing six dimensional chess up in there. A good captain will figure out the next thousand years' moves in advance, I've heard." "I don't envy him." Captain James Cook stood on a featureless white plane under a black starless sky, using a rod of wax to mark the ground in red. Taking into account all of the nearby cosmic entities - the rocks and dust and occasional dwarf - he charted out the next hundred years' plan, then the hundred after that, then the hundred after that. The landscape around him turned pink as he marked the hours to make up the days to make up the months to make up the years. An alarm sounded. Karl and Will ran to their respective stations. The chair began to rouse the Captain for the emergency. James had finished year 963 when he started sliding down the smooth surface. His naked body smeared the red wax on the floor as the floor smeared it on him and after rolling for a couple seconds he was finally kicked off the ground into the ether. Floating in space, he assumed the posture of sitting in a chair so that his carriage back into physicality would be less violent. Then like a dog pushed off a cliff he was back in his seat, chin wet, looking through the porthole towards his previous home; outsideness. 2022-09-16 Bookworm I looked for a moment at a painting above the stairs and their bronze railing. It had an elaborate painting of a symbol that resembled a Cyrillic "Щ". "Alright, let's go." I gestured to the stairs. "What? Why?" Aaron walked through one of the dozen or so aisles of shelves, each packed with books up to the height of his shoulder. The room we were in encompassed the full third floor of the cylindrical tomb to which we were tourists, lit brightly by incandescent lamps and only incandescent lamps. There were no windows nor would there be anything of interest past the glass if there were. "You said there would be one or two people here to meet us." Aaron raised a hand on which he was raising his index finger but I interrupted him. "If there's nobody to meet us for what's essentially a distress call, from this 'living vault' which I'd call a crypt, what got to them first? Whatever it was, I don't wanna meet it." "Everything here is visible. There are no places to hide, or hide a body." At that, I scanned the ceiling but it was just uniform brick. "I don't know where they went, but we've looked around, and there's nothing here. I don't see why you'd be so unnerved." I wasn't unnerved – at least I didn't think I was visibly so. On the other side of the room, which wasn't terribly big, though it was of a reasonable size for a small library, a hardwood board under the tightly woven carpet let out a muffled squeak. A cheap bell rattled. Judging by the look on Aaron's face, I had given him a death glare, but after he looked down his aisle he relaxed. "It's a cat." I slowly stepped over to his aisle of books and there, on the other end of the row, was a black and white cat with a red collar. I said the first thing that came to my mind. "Its head is too big." Aaron looked at me but I kept looking at the cat. "'Its head is too big'?" The cat's head kept extending and growing. Whatever reaction I had caused Aaron to turn back to the cat. "Oh, fuck." The cat's fur grew sparse as its skin stretched wide and its head turned a slow spiral into an upside-down position before its forehead grew fangs and its former lips fused together. Its eyes widened and became humanlike. The creature must have been three meters long with a serpentine head but cat-sized body at the end, away from us. Its fangs were what peeked of a mouth and that mouth opened its wide jaw and began to speak in a deep rumble of a voice. "I." I slowly reached for and silently unbuttoned the clasp on my knife while maintaining my stare at the creature. Aaron, probably close enough to the thing to smell it if it had a smell, trembled slightly but enough that I noticed. I wished I hadn't gone into this damn grave without my lighter but it was confiscated by Aaron's parents (also the governing body of this archive – built to withstand a nuclear blast, so humanity had a "damn fine base from which to regrow their knowledge" – Aaron's mother's words, not mine). It wasn't something I didn't understand – I too long for a first edition Origin of Species sometimes after one or two glasses of wine at night, and have to page through Sotheby's catalog in order to talk myself out of bidding the next time one's stolen out of East Germany, but if there was truly some new Dracula or Frankenstein – aside from the books, that is – hidden in these rows, I'd be willing to burn down a lot more than some paper or even myself to make sure it never saw the light of day. Aaron finally spoke. "Hello?" The creature tore a tentacle underneath the cat's chest and swung it up above its head, morphing it into a fleshy wreath-like structure, almost like a set of antlers. Its head and tentacle, I noticed, bent backward as they stretched up, to keep its center of gravity below its paws. I realized what it was doing, forming a fractal construct of flesh and the gaps between around its head, as a second tentacle tore through the fur on the cat's back. "Aaron. Back away towards me." The creature's eyes, bigger now, blue, turned towards me. It rumbled and finally spoke, something: "Apart from the one fundamental nastiness-" it made a gargling noise "-nineteenth century suffering from toothache." It thrust its tentacle towards Aaron and he turned and ran for the stairs, to which I also started running. The creature began to scream in a cacophony of fifty voices. Aaron and I got to the end of the stairway and ran across the second floor (fiction) to its descending stairs. I didn't take the time to look behind myself. When we got to the bottom-most level of the vault Aaron ran to the telephone next to the stone arch exit, currently leading to a brick wall, and rang the operator as I turned to face his six and saw the monster, with the body of a cat, the face of a (for lack of better description) werewolf, and the two tentacles of a void, approaching, by morphing its appendages into some sort of shape that could grip onto the stone bricks of the ceiling. By the time it had climbed its way to the center of the room the vault started violently twisting and the centrifugal force threw me and Aaron against the wall. The beast staggered but hunkered down, moving its body towards the ceiling. The black oily tentacles spread out into the bricks like they were Play-Doh shoved into a fine mesh. The door next to us opened up and we made our way across the wall to which we were pinned and fell through. We yelled to the engineers to keep it twisting and the portal slid shut behind us. Aaron's father, Robert Arsenault, in his signature suit and green tie, jogged down the freshly painted hall to meet us and the operator of his billion dollar vault. Aaron and I were smoking, to Robert's chagrin, and against the advice of Jamie Simon, who was almost as well known as Robert but in different fields. In fact, the design of the library was officially called the Simon Machine, and used novel mechanisms to rotate an entire cylindrical building on its base as an extremely overkill locking mechanism so no unauthorized entities could get in. I wasn't briefed on the details, or, well, I was, but I didn't have the three PhDs necessary to understand any of it. A vent softly pumped air from the surface. Technically our location wasn't supposed to be made known to the lackeys but Aaron said it was somewhere in Peru. "What the hell was that?" Aaron tapped his cigarette on the previously empty ashtray next to Jamie's keyboard. "I dunno." Robert thrust a pointed finger into Aaron's face. "You don't know? An animal got into my library and neither of you can even tell what the fuck it was? Do you even know how many legs it had?" Aaron seemed to have the same idea I had; Robert could figure out what the thing was without our help. He wouldn't believe us if we told him what we saw. Unfinished! A shame, too. I think that one could have been pretty good. Maybe sometime I'll write a middle and ending. /blah/2023-01-03.html 2022-12-07 I don't think about thinking, I just think it and I think even when I can't think about anything else I think about my thoughts about the day it left me and I think about it I can't think about anything else I think about Venus and the moon and the sun and I think about when they came and killed everyone I think about the last time us two had some fun and I think about when we came and killed everyone The sky is falling off the mountains and sirens filling my brain and the smoke attack the smoke grenades the blood in the lane the sky is on the edge of the earth and there are cracks in the night and the SWAT team and the G-men and the federal fight 2022-10-08 1 The one hun dred me ter sprint . . . . . 2 and it's you that's dead in last . . . . . 3 When . will you just ad mit . . . . . . 4 You aren't win ning in this lap . . . . . 5 You mean no thing . to me . I'm try ing . my best . . . . . 6 You're a hu man . dis ease . And my best is good e nough . . . . 7 I gave it all to you . . Leave me a lone . I'm tir ed . . . 8 And then you just col lapsed . . of this stuff . . . . . . . . 9 You di dn't go for the gold . I ne ver went for the gold . I . . went for the gold . . . 10 You went for the sil ver . . I went for the sil ver . . And I got the sil ver . . . . 11 And now you're get ting old . . And now I'm get ting old . . I'm look ing at the bronze . . . . 12 And my hair is tur ning sil ver And your hair is tur ning sil ver Throw my me dal in the ri ver . . 13 . How could you do this to me? . How could I do this to you? . Is it hap pi ness I seek? . . 14 . Keep me out of the . loop . I thought I made it ea sy . All this time I've been so sad . . 15 . And at the end of the day . And at the end of the day . I'm so god damn in com plete . . 16 . I lost out in the race . . You lost out in the race . . I want what you guys have . . . A lot of what I do is foreshadowed by other stuff I do. Before Blang (still in development and not even publicly released) was the configuration system for ytfeed, which was weird in some areas. The behavior was mostly due to side effects. Then Usagi, a similar fantasy computer but with much loftier goals than Blang which never really came to fruition. When it came to making an RSS feed reader, after ytfeed.py (which started as a proof of concept out of boredom using some Python RSS module or something) sort of collapsed from technical debt (look, I can use buzzwords too) I really wanted to take ytfeed.sh and expand it to be more UNIXy and KISSy but lost motivation. I had a couple attempts after that such as "awdri", which has one feed.py file with: #!/usr/bin/env python config = [ "feed_dir": "/home/trinity/awdri/Feeds" ] But I don't even know what that was gonna be. Eventually I came up with pigfeed which is a half-decent base for an RSS feed reader, I think. Plus its model and design are delightful though undercooked. 2022-10-21 The End of the World, And What Happened Next 1. "Put your money in the wishing well, and your wish may well come true." The beggar turned to me, his rotted teeth spitting through the phrase. "The wishing well?" I looked into the field behind him. I didn't see any well. "It's not a real well. It's a wallet number. Put in a coin and reap good luck for the rest of your life." He handed me the business card of a preacher in the church across the street behind us. On the back was a hexadecimal wallet code, 512-bit – a legacy address, scrawled in ballpoint. I could hardly make out the 1s from 7s or the 4s from 9s. I put it in my shirt pocket. "An entire coin? I thought beggars usually wanted a fiver or tenner?" He stared into me with orange eyes. Tattooed irises, probably to go with his hair. "It's not my wallet. Wanna miss out?" He waved his arms out. "Your loss!" 2. Simon was sitting at his desk filling forms when he saw kamisama from his upstairs window. She disappeared into the forest across the street. He quickly ran downstairs into the trees to find her sitting on a stump at a stream, brushing her hair. "Where have you been? I haven't heard you in days." Simon started to retie his right shoe which was too loose. "Are you avoiding me?" Kamisama spoke quietly. "They're trying to take me away." Simon finished the bunny ears and double knotted it. "Who?" "I don't know. But I'm disappearing." Simon sat on the stump. "Is it me? We knew this might happen eventually." Kamisama shook her head. "No, we can't part yet. I don't want you blindly leading yourself. Someone is doing this to you." -1. "I don't know what's worth putting a coin in an anonymous wallet, but whatever it is, I don't need it anyway." I started to walk away. He yelled behind me. "Fine! You just ignored the best opportunity of your life!" I kept walking. /blah/2023-01-02.html Ted wandered off as he heard sirens approach the crumbling office. His office was a part of a sparse lot of buildings in the sparse tundra of Underhelm, a small town on the outskirts of Dance City. The nearest neighbor to his office, a tall but sterile, empty building, simply concrete, glass, insulation, drywall, and plenty of carpet and flammable internal bits to start a blaze, had a sign advertising its potential as a center of operations or call center or something business or another that Ted didn't have the capacity to care about. He didn't know where he got the jerrycan, and didn't know how it still had any petrol in it, not to mention how it was still full. Ted kicked down the fashionable but laughably flimsy double doors to the office, then the next pair of doors past the entryway. The interior looked like it would look really good if it was set on fire. Ted angled the can to pour a thin stream of gasoline as he walked from room to room on the ground floor. He admired the new-car smell, the gasoline aroma, the new-wall scent, the benzene draw, the new tables and chairs and light fixtures and Cisco-branded IP phones and the pattern on the carpet and the sharp geometry of the modernist architecture and soon he was back in the lobby, having completed a loop. Like a soldier, he turned anticlockwise and continued out of the building, carving a petroleum circle into the dead grass surrounding the lifeless vessel. Ted struggled with his lighter. It was a disposable Bic that was nearly out of butane. After a minute of clicking he was able to get a flame for a moment and lit the gas trail. He watched the little bead of entropy follow the path and split out into three, two following the circle and one cautiously approaching the edifice. The brush and the building caught fire over a period of a couple minutes and the fire roared to life. "Must not have been up to code, that." Ted whispered to himself. "Quite a lot of form, though. Now it finally serves a function." /blah/2023-01-01.html 2022-12-31 221231_2107.wav [21:07] Well I'm in New York for the first time in my life, so I figured I'd take a moment and do a, a bona fide audio blog- a- audio, what is that, an aog? I dunno. Because, uh, there ain't no way I'm gonna get a chance to sit down and type this, um, my first thought, uh, approaching New York, was "My God, the city smells like soy sauce!" and it might have been the car. It might have been me. I dunno. But uh, now I'm- now I'm here. Um, it took a little while to get here. I was gonna plan to meet up with, uh, [21:08] an acquaintance from back in- back in the /bpg/ days, when that was a thing, um, but that sort of fell through. That's okay, another time. Um, so I'm basically in the city now and I'm basically just walking around, um, I've never been to New York City before. At one corner I saw a bunch of trash, spilled, just like, a shrine to- a shrine to garbage. Shrine to- shrine to waste. Um, I thought that was funny. I'm not taking a lot of pictures because, [21:09] pictures? Who needs pictures? Also my phone doesn't have a lot of battery, and I could plug it in but I can't even find a goddamn place to stand around, there are all these signs saying no standing any time? I have no clue how you could forbid standing. Um, I see city bike things but I don't know how to use these damn things. Um, but I guess I could bike if I figured them out, but then I'd be bicycling, and that wouldn't be a whole lot better than walking when I wanna take a pause. So, I dunno. But it would be nice to get around the city a little bit faster. But I'm sorta- I'm sorta just taking it in. Because this is wild. It's uh, it's smaller [21:10] than I expected from what my grandpa said but it's about what I expected from what I thought, um, and it's raining and the streets are slick, but for, towards the chilliest part of the year, it really ain't too bad around here. I guess that's the uh, the 2022 New Year's- New Year's Eve heat wave or whatever from our storm, a little bit prior, um, really washed away all the snow, but yeah <"hey yeah" y'know, and uh- <"Hey." Hey. 'Sup. <"How are you doing?" Doing well, how 'bout you? <[unintelligible] What? <"You're very beautiful, what's your name?" Uh, Trinity, how 'bout you? <"Huh?" Trinity, what's your name? [21:11]<"Najeem." What? <"Najeem." Najeem? <"That's a nice name." Thank you. <"Whatcha doing tonight?" Ah, y'know, just walkin' around. <"Uh, you live over here?" Nah, I live in Maine. <"Upstate? Oh, you got a hotel here?" Uh, yeah, I'm staying in a, uh, staying nearby. <"Uh, have you ever had a, like, have you ever had a big black dick?" Huh? <"Have you ever had a big black dick?" Nah. <"Would you like that?" Nah. <"You should try it. You might like it." Y'know, maybe some other time, I'm sorta just here visiting family. <"Alright, well I need you to give me some head real quick. Before you go." I don't think I will. <"You don't have no choice." Nah, I don't think I will. <"I'm a murderer, you know that?" Alright. <"I'm joking. Have a good night." Uh huh. You too. Well, that was something. But that's New York. Still got my wallet. Still got my keys. [21:12] Still got my compass. Still got my phone. But, that was... huh. Anyway. So, wait, I should probably say that, what he said again, because I don't know if it it came through but he said [...] yeah. I dunno. Y'know, it's nice to be desired. That guy was gonna chop me up into pieces but it's nice to be desired. Y'know, I have very low standards. [...] [21:13] So now I'm walking back where I came. "Duane Reade by Walgreens". I wonder what that is. Um, [...], honestly if he didn't say that, if he just asked politely, I probably would have. Um, but y'know. I should probably check myself out for trackers later but. [21:14] ... I like the- I like the ambience of the city. The honk honk. The sirens that echo across the street. That really fill the- fill the noise up, with harsh shrill, but only for a little bit, then it returns back to the quiet ring-a-ding, buzz-a-buzz. There's a lot more people on these tricycle sort of things, that can [21:15] carry people. I, I never saw one before I went here. And there's some buses, and apparently there's a Niel Diamond Broadway show or something. And yeah, I'm pretty much taking turns at random. This must be an Oakley shop or something. But uh, y'know, it's peaceful. And tonight's New Year's Eve, and uh, probably not gonna be able to see the ball drop. Because I would need to get in a huge crowd and be searched and wouldn't be able to use the bathroom, yadda yadda yadda. And I ain't really, [21:16] I'd rather just chill out. I like goin' to the places where the people aren't, because usually the interesting things are the things not seen by everybody. Are there any public bathrooms in New York? Also I definitely went this way already. I uh, I went to a pizza place, and I think I got the wrong order. But they said something to me, and I didn't quite understand it, because it was in Spanish and, I mean, I- I can pick out some phrases, like I can recognize what you're [21:17] speakin', I can recognize the language, but I cannot translate especially on the fly so I just stared blankly at them and then they laughed and it wasn't what I ordered but it was alright pizza. "Psychic readings"? "$10 special"? Are these the psychic readings? <"Yes." Oh, cool. 221231_2120.wav [21:20] That psychic reading was almost completely wrong, but, it's fun to do it. I wonder how they come up with these things. Uh, they said I don't usually speak my mind, which is untrue, usually take responsibility for things, which is true, um, I do what I want when I want, which is true, but, I don't sleep as well as I used to, which, I sleep probably better than I ever have. But, y'know, that's fun. They don't have anything like that in Maine. Walking through some scaffolding now. This is- "sprinkler fire department connection", y'know I wonder how they design big buildings like this, I wonder how they add to them. But not enough to actually look it up [21:21] because it's probably really boring. ... Oh, gone in a circle again, but, it's fun. Um, I'd like to get up, to a position where I can see the ball drop, but I don't think that's gonna happen. Sorta just walking around. [21:22] I can see ah, Radio City Music Hall, which, my grandmother went to Radio City Music Hall, when she was a lass, and, she was disturbed by the, uh, frivolous fragrant- the fragrant pandering to the male gaze. That's how I would describe it. That's probably not how she would describe it, but, it's about what she said. [21:23] All the songs playing are songs about New York. But we're in New York. Um, something something simulacrum? I dunno, I never read Baudrillard. Probably just gonna keep going down this street. Uh, passing West 48th, this is, what, oh, Avenue of the Americas, that's pretty cool. [21:24] Do I have any other cool things I've observed in New York City? Not really. It's very rainy and there's not a lot to do when it's raining. You can duck under things, sure, but, only for the moment. I suppose you could do so for a longer moment but, I don't know. I'm a stranger in a strange land. When in Rome, do as Romans do. And they ain't doing that. But they are tooting horns very loudly. <"Five dollars, five dollars, five dollars. Five dollars. Five dollars." [21:25] When I, uh, when I went to do that palm reading, uh, I put a twenty dollar bill down on the slightly wet but mostly covered table, um and, I thought this would go straight down. Well I'll walk back then. Um, I was like "You got change for a 20?" because it was a $10 palm reading and they were like, er- well, not really a palm reading, more like a psychic prediction, and I said- and they said "No, but I can do a full palm reading for uh, for $40." And I said "Can you do a half palm reading, for $20?" And they said no but then they said they felt bad and they'd give me a partial palm reading. [21:26] So I did get a half palm reading, for $20 - a bargain in New York City. ... I love languages, but I'm not much of a people person. I guess I'm more cut out for linguistics than actual translation. Ah, it's a little apple because it's the big apple. Um, [21:27] yeah. There's a Major League Baseball store, I guess. I didn't expect so much litter. I also expected the air to be a lot worse, um, one of my friends who went here said you feel a lot more tired after walking in New York than in Maine but I think it's because the weed is a lot stronger here. [21:28] And he was probably blazing up. Alright, recording off. /blah/2022-12-31.html 2022-04-19 Snippets from /home/trinity/homepage/computer.html Hello and welcome to the world of computing. This guide is intended to take you from a cursory or completely nonexistent knowledge of how computers work or even what a computer is to an understanding with which you're comfortable. As this guide will go on the manner of language will shift from conversational and casual to more formal and technical; this is because these earlier sections are more like learning to ride a bike, where you won't easily forget the basics, but the later sections are more like learning to build a bike, where you may need to reference the manual later. This is also a perpetually unfinished document, please refer to the updated date as its version if your citation format permits it. To start, let's run over some basic terminology. Many of these terms are ambiguous and will be better specified later. The Monitor The monitor (term taken from the verb monitor), or screen (term taken from the verb screen), is a raster display unit your computer controls. In some manner, which depends on the technology your monitor uses, there is being displayed some sort of content that your computer has generated. It may be these very words. Monitors are usually interchangeable but sometimes entire computers can be included in the monitor unit itself, the concept of which is known as all-in-one computer units because all components of the computer except input devices are in the same place (the monitor assembly). It's possible your computer doesn't have a monitor. Possibly, you're using a teletypewriter, which prints text output onto paper using ink, though this is unlikely as they were obsoleted fifty years ago in favor of "glass teletypes" (glass here refers to the glass tube of a cathode ray tube monitor). Possibly, you're using assistive technologies and aren't sighted. Or maybe you're making this entire document up and are in a dream. There are many ways to use computers that don't involve monitors but seeing as they're so common-place there's a very good likelihood you are indeed using one. The Key-board The keyboard is how many people input text into their computer. There are many types of keyboards. Most people use standard QWERTY (named such after the first five alphabetical runes that appear on the board) keyboards, where each button is one symbol and perhaps there are special buttons that change the meaning of the other buttons. There are also chorded keyboards, where each combination (or chord, like on a piano) of keys represents a symbol. Possibly, you're not using a keyboard at all, and are instead using assistive technologies such as speech recognition. My intent with the computer guide was to emphasize atypical but important interfaces between user and machine, to make the guide relevant to every single person who would read the guide. Making a guide only for those who are sighted, hearing, have feeling in their fingertips, can read small text, is ridiculous and limits the audience far too much. Accessibility is the future absolutely. 0908 In the car on the way to New York City. 1135 Still in the car I'm still getting over having my desktop Fx on my phone. It's glitchy as hell but it works. Like, damm! A crowd had formed outside of the building, in the parking lot. Ted stood with his hands in his pockets and tie blowing in the slight breeze watching the blaze. Out of the crowd a single black (trousers) and white (shirt) figure emerged. He walked tensely to Ted and stood in front of him. Ted's blank gaze stayed looking through his boss to the fire. "Ted, you piece of shit." The boss, a lanky mam of roughly the same height as Ted whose name escaped memory, sprayed a small droplet of saliva on Ted's collar, which bothered Ted. Ted looked at his shoes pointing to his boss's. "You're fired -" Ted smiled "- of course, and we'll see what the authorities do when they arrive." Ted's wife emerged from the crowd in the same attire. She looked roughly like Ted - plain beyond words - with a softer face and longer hair. "Hey, Ron, we're all a little stressed. Look at him. He's snapped. That's not Ted anymore. Take it easy and we'll let the EMTs take a look." Ron brushed Ted's wife's chin with his finger and had a look in his eye that confused Ted. "Alright Minerva. I- I'm not sure what we're gonna do," he turned towards the office, "about all this." This was the first time Ted had seen his boss stutter. "We'll get on." Without waiting for any authorities to arrive, Ron found his car in the parking lot and got in. Minerva got into the passenger's seat without prompt. Ted listened but didn't watch as the car started and then rolled out of the lot. He watched the smoke billow out of the windows. Ted whispered to himself. "Arson time." 1458 Arrived at Manhattan /blah/2022-12-30.html I occasionally write blahposts a day in advance. And who will stop me? [10:14 AM] Daruna_: Have y'all seen the [...] circle? [10:14 AM] Daruna_: https://meetcircle.com/ [...] [10:28 AM] Segmentation fault: in any case, not only is this parental fascism, i assume they log literally all data on your home network considering you're giving them access to it [10:39 AM] Daruna_: I've never heard the term parental fascism before, but I kinda fuck with it. They're a lot of fascistic normalized behaviors in parenting that are just straight up abuse. [...] [10:50 AM] meatgrinder #1 hypocrite: you two.... It's called SAFETY "Parental fascism" is a pretty good term for it, I think. Parents get goaded into tracking their kids, because tracking kids makes money for the people for the people doing the tracking. It normalizes the feeling of being surveilled - a comfort blanket made out of eyes and ears. I was gonna say more but I just realized I don't have anything new to bring to this, so who cares. I found something in /home/trinity/bak/Documents/dog.odt: 2021-06-21 I would like to become a dog I have been housesitting the residence of the family of a friend of mine who are all currently vacationing (specific activity unknown) in Florida right now in 2021 (- he and his company are all vaccinated against the current pandemic). His family, particularly his mother and aunt, take care of three well-behaved and often adorable dogs whom I shant name for their (the dogs' and the family's) privacy, and the responsibility fell to me, which was at first exciting in a bad way but is now boring in a good way. I care not only for but about the dogs, and I like to think they care about me though they are incapable of ever caring for me in quite the same way. But even if they don't, it doesn't matter. They still behave, still go outside when I'd like them to please urinate on the grass and not the hardwood floor, and still will sleep next to me if not for companionship then for warmth. I am okay with this. Essentially, I am a robot (in the sense that my actions to take care of the dogs is automatic, and that I don't need significant input nor pay) in servitude to these dogs – it's not that I mind, of course; I do love these dogs even if they may not love me (are dogs capable of sentient love?). And this concept is interesting. They essentially live in their paradise; they go outside every 2-3 hours (whenever they move around usually it's because they'd like to move around outside) and exercise their bodily functions out there when need be, they play with each other and at least seem to have intellectual stimulation out in the back yard, and they all get as much water as they want and two get food whenever they want (the larger one has a stricter diet of two cups of more wholesome food in the morning and at night). They are in heaven and I am the robot that serves them. When I am off-line, others are there to serve them. When others are off-line, even others will serve them. I would like to be a dog. Though, specifically, I would like to be a being that has its physical needs met always and that is intellectually stimulated with equal peers with which to interract. Why is this not possible? Robots certainly exist, and certainly there is enough food in the world to feed everybody who needs food, and certainly with wastewater recycling and other means of conserving the environment there could be enough water for everyone, and it's not hard to make a bathroom fit for humans (just make sure it's not where they eat), and it's not hard to make this a suburban reality (for contact with both nature and peers), and intellectual stimulation can be provided by peers and by the environment. With automation, anyone can be a dog. Yet it seems like only the wealthy are dogs. But dogs don't spend money! What need do they have for overabundant wealth? God Damn Capitalism. Alright, it's now actually 2022-12-30. I wanted to save my New Year's Eve thoughts for New Year's Eve just in case I have something useful to say. Unlikely. I'm probably gonna formally give up on Arson Comics (<arson.pisskink.org>) because it's hard to follow up on it and I think the writing was somewhat poor from the get go. I'll try to write a successor, bit by bit, in this blah. Ted walked through the wasteland of his former workplace as it burned. He could smell the sweet benzene in the gasoline that had begun to ignite and feel the summer heat, the artificial heat, his artificial heat from his embers. Lucid yet still almost in a drunk trance he paced from the stairs to the door as his co-workers rushed around him to get out of the burning building. A siren called in the distance. He recalled himself as he left the office building. Someone - Todd? - grabbed him "How could you do this?!" Ted only knew what he had just done as a dream or very distant memory. "What?" He seemed to, almost as though he was a computer or automaton, reset to his known state. "I'm Ted." He smiled a weak, nervous smile. "I love my job." Every once in a while I write program code that I think is truly brilliant - difficult to figure out, but once I have, I'm amazed at how well it works. Then I realize it doesn't work. hubris (noun) - hyoo͞′brĭs 1. Overbearing pride or presumption; arrogance. 2. Excessive pride, presumption or arrogance (originally toward the gods). 3. overbearing pride or presumption The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, 5th Edition. I hate it when blogs use Substack because I know it's gonna annoy me with a cookie banner or e-mail popup or whatever. Tosu gets my e-mail and only Tosu's Substack because she's really cool. If I don't know you you aren't getting my e-mail /even though it's public/ because if you're asking you're probably going to send me things I don't care about. Medium is much, much worse. Just get a website and learn HTML. Right-click this page and hit "view source"! It's not pretty but at least it doesn't ask for your e-mail. Discover more from TRINITY'S BLAH give me e-mail for e-mail purposes! _____________________________________________ ______ | | |Submit| `---------------------------------------------' `------' I'm glad to have such strange friends who would probably give me their e-mail if I had an input box on this page, but maybe that's a testament to how similarly strange I am. 「ヤバイ」は補足。 And now today's the Eve of the New Year. 0319. But I wanted to share this cool link here: <https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:SSTV_sunset_audio.ogg> This is my favorite photo of a sunset. /blah/2022-12-29.html One time when I was a kid I woke up with a shit ton of goo on my chest. It was greenish and watery and when I went downstairs and washed it off I realized there were three holes etched through my skin to the right of my left breast, in the shape of an acute triangle if its corners were placed by a drunkard. I went to the hospital and they said something like the dermal structure (I could be misremembering this phrase) was gone. I had to, a couple times a day for the next week, disinfect it with povidone iodine and then apply an antibiotic so it wouldn't get infected. I still have the scar though it's blotchy and faded now. This must have been June or July 2021. In between the changing of the bandage and house-sitting for a friend I wrote something about the serenity of being a dog, which I will share if I find, and a paper about the implementation of and different implementations of POSIX cat(1) which now lives at <be.murderu.us/unix#posix#cat(1)>. At the time I thought both were good but now I think neither are. Something to improve I suppose. My way of writing was popping a can of Moxie, sitting down with a laptop (my Thinkpad X200 Tablet), and laying down exactly what I thought. Structure be damned! Little has changed. Occasionally I'd fire up the friend's new PS5 and play Astro's Playroom, a delightful technical demonstration of the PS5's hardware and showcase of the DualSense controller which was so good I ordered one myself that week, even though I didn't have a PlayStation. Sitting there, a cold can of pop and a hole in my chest and enjoying the bleeding edge of consumer grade video game technology, I wasn't quite happy, but at least I was distracted. /blah/2022-12-28.html Get up doggy. Please! Here's a thesis on which I never elaborated, that I wrote for this blah. 2022-12-18 ; cat drugs.txt "Drugs are bad" is something I say to myself while I sip my morning coffee and puff my cigarette, reading the newspaper. Then I go to work and on my lunch break flag the dealer down on Main Street for crack and tell him my thoughts on the matter, and he laughs and asks how long I'm gonna be making the same joke, and oh probably another week or so. Drugs are bad in much the same way chemicals are bad, and crystals are bad, and molecules are blasphemous, and faith pays as long as you can still give to the church. Another: 2022-12-19 As part of my campaign for the worsening of the world (I'm not allowed to discuss my sponsors) my next trick will be to poke fun at websites. To me this "web" is a little service hosted on most websites at port 80 that will return reading material if I write a neat request in the format of the HyperText Transport Protocol (or HTTP). Fun! Usually, though, I get a program to automate this task for me. I like Firefox and Lynx, the latter more than the former though I use Fx the most. There have been a number of developments to the web I really don't like: - Cascading StyleSheets (or CSS). I remember when I could go into my browser settings and change the text color, font, and size, and the background color. Now when using Fx I'm at the mercy of the site designer who usually doesn't share my sensibilities, much less sense. Also not completed. I wrote something else that I liked but I don't know where I put it. Looking through computer backups makes me very lonely. I'm currently working on getting rid of most of my stuff - I really don't need much and it's weighing me down. But the reason I had so much damn stuff was because I was planning on spending my life with somebody. It's not so bad to be alone but I wish I had planned for it, or that my plans had worked out a little better. So it goes... At any given moment there are hundreds of accomplishable plots to end the world. Most are horrifying, some are near-completion, some aren't planned except in the back of the minds of men, where conscious thought breaks down and only the God-daemons are left to staff the console. The following four things strike me as things that are actually worrying: - TempleOS (reason: [...]) - blockchains (reason: From what little I know about the blockchain - which is really not a lot! - I wonder if it could become sentient. I wonder if it already is. Substitute "the blockchain" for your favorite.) The sudden growth of memes should worry me but it doesn't because when I dove into them I found them to be a very effective weapon, and that counter- attacks aren't too difficult to launch when needed. The main problems to be solved are automation and timing. I think the television show "Infowars" was actually just some convoluted but successful attempt to inoculate a critical mass of "true believers" (someone should come up with a term that isn't stupid) against certain ideas. By presenting itself in a way that is just outright silly and unbelievable except by the most gullible of its potential viewers, it discredits its ideas and those that repeat them. To say that there is veritable information warfare, in a way that is very new and very exciting strategically, would not be at all controversial unless this silly television show called "Infowars" with a kooky host and fake stories existed that discredits the idea. To say 5G will be very convenient for law enforcement to find and prosecute or persecute criminals or alleged criminals (politics may vary) would be to repeat common knowledge if the stuff of "Infowars"' ilk hadn't already presented 5G as some heinous conspiracy based not on the potential for geolocation based on access point connection triangulation (there's probably a better term for this but I don't draft and edit blahposts) but the idea that harmless radio waves are some evil wireless mind control plot or whatever. On a side note, I was tipped off to the wack part of 5G by someone in [...] back when I was loosely associated but included in communications. I've seen their claim repeated but don't have a citation. Empiracally (is that how you spell that?) though, if you need more 5G towers because the signal isn't very strong, an accessing device will have to be physically closer to a given tower, and so finding it will be easier if you know to what towers it's connected. Presumably cell providers know this (I don't know a lot about the nitty-gritties) and provide it to law enforcement - they do know cell location in 4G and prior technologies. But don't quote me - look stuff up and double check your damn sources! Why would Alex Jones give up his life, basically, just to tell some lies on a television show? Probably, though, he's just rage-drunk and struggling through withdrawal from slamming his fist on expensive desks. I'm mostly an ideas person. I wish I was more of an implementation person but I'm just not skilled enough yet. つづく /blah/2022-12-27.html 20XX refers to the past, not the future, in one fifth of cases. But the past was pretty futuristic! Dream big, I need my space. 2022-09-13 Slipstream DTB Published here under the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial- NoDerivatives 4.0 International Public License. They found Amber as some DNA encased in fossilized tree sap when I was twenty years old. A small networked community speculated that society's problems were due to our genetic distance from our ancestors. This was my twenty-second year, for the third or fourth time. I meet my wife Cassidy for the first time for the fourth time next week. I go to work. I work at a laboratory, at this time JCN, "where dreams are made", before it's taken and turned into the National Defense Center, NDC. I can prevent this by submitting a false, smaller figure for our proposal for governmental funding – a clerical oversight, no more than an off-by-ten, changes an official's perception of how "innovative" JCN can be, influences their and eventually their leader's choice. Yang Electric becomes NDC instead; another aboriginal creation forced to assimilate. Someone asks me how my day is going. My day is fine. How is yours? Not so good, Ada. Carl gets a divorce next January and dies six months after that. Officially of grief, technically of a gunshot wound. I leave. Today I worked on a paper I publish next month on hyper -realistic simulation of reality, simulation into which someone could (inexpensively) be dropped unaware. Even my first time working on this I was so horrified at what I had created I for the first time and uncomfortably faked numbers on my paper so nobody would be interested. One could end up perceiving decades in seconds; trapped in hell or suffocated in heaven. Immersion is only useful to a certain extent. I get into my car. 667 River Road. I drive past the animal shelter at which I worked as a teenager. Unit 5. I knock on the door. Cassidy's uncle answers. He still has hair, I didn't know he still had hair now. We're both on the ground in his apartment. I brought a scalpel thinking it would be enough but I forgot this is only a couple years after Ron got out of the Navy. He calls me a fucking psychopath and I grunt but say nothing. JCN still sharpens the scalpels between each use – this changes because it's overkill, we only really use them for opening boxes even by now. He's on top of me. All I need is one straight cut but I manage to plunge the blade into his windpipe. He chokes and coughs blood onto me. It burns like acid. I stand up and close the door. He's living alone, working at a warehouse, on the top floor so I don't need to worry about unexpected guests. I have no prior connection with this corpse. He has dozens of enemies including the children of the families he separated in the middle-East. I wipe off the doorknob and my face, put my bandanna back into my pocket, and leave. In this part of town I'm not worried about anyone describing my car to the police, not worried about the surveillance because there isn't any yet, at least to the extent with which I'm familiar. I'm back in my car. I'm staring blankly at the road. I'm in my driveway. I'm staring blankly at the television. I'm laying in bed staring at the ceiling. I'm at work. I'm at home. I'm in bed. I work. I go home. I go to bed. I meet my wife Cassidy for the first time for the fourth time. Cassidy Malcolm, my name is Ada Karina. Last night you played the lottery; you always play the date and truncate off the extra digits. You've never told anybody about how your childhood hamster ate its babies and you didn't know why. Please have coffee with me. When I met her for the first time for the second time she eventually confessed that she drank coffee, not tea, and that's why she was so hesitant to meet me that second first time. She switched to tea later. That hesitation made her meet me after she had already taken the job at the wristwatch company. She would see her uncle next week and tell him about us if he was still alive. I think of this as I order us two of her favorite potion, cold brewed coffee with a pinch of cinnamon. She hasn't had this in months, she tells me for the fourth time. I apologize for my detachment. I've seen my world crumble again and again. I'm too far gone, and I'm sorry, and I have to move on. She's talking to me for the first time for the fourth time and the last time and I'm not listening. I'm sipping the cold brew and trying to taste the cinnamon, for the last time. The NDC euthanized Cassidy via baton. I watched from behind a window grate in handcuffs as two children in police uniforms beat her until she stopped moving, and then until she stopped bleeding and then until they were tired. She slowly splintered into pieces, bending at more and more seams rolling back and forth on the tile. Her brain chemistry was a single link too far from Amber. I go home. I sleep. My day is fine. How is yours? To be honest, Ada, things aren't so great at home. I'm sorry to hear that, Carl. What's wrong? My wife won't talk to me. I don't know why. She's just slowly gone silent. Maybe it's me? Have you talked to those close to her? Typing, clicking. I'm staring at a light bulb, hammering phosphors off in new familiar patterns. They found me when they dragged Cassidy's corpse into the acid bath. They shoved me along a steel hallway and took me to a holding cell with a dozen other loved of the dead. During her second final week on Earth Cassidy was rarely awake and less often lucid. When she wasn't as well Cassidy said she felt like she was being dissolved. She coughed up blood, lots of it. The doctors asked me if she could have been exposed to anything that would cause lung cancer. Ron was a loving uncle, caring brother, and courageous veteran who will be dearly missed. Service will be held at Lisbon St. Baptist, 8-12, 5pm. Cassidy's uncle's obituary was brief to stay within the minimum cost from the paper. My third thirty-fifth year, he shot her in the side of her head. I tackled him to the ground and beat him until he stopped moving, and then until he stopped bleeding, and then until I was tired, when I collapsed next to him. The police came for the noise complaint. I set up tests for my project. One of the tests checks for whether a program that only ever returns a zero value returns a true value, which it doesn't. I pretend to not know what's wrong. My day is fine. How's yours? I- I don't know, Ada. I'm sorry. I entered my password into the locking panel on the door. It still worked. I read digests of all active projects in the laboratory and took note of one of the room numbers. I loaded both an old program I wrote and a current program being developed at NDC onto my wristwatch, opened the door, and ran. The other captives ran too, to a different wing of the building in a greater number. Cassidy and I found her dog dead in her apartment two weeks after we met for the first time in my third twenty-second year. Brick was shot with a rifle. The police came but didn't find the round and the killer left no other trace. I asked the neighbor across the hall and he said he didn't hear Brick bark at whomever shot him. I go home. I go to sleep. I wake up. I go to work. Dials spinning. Buttons clicking. There's an issue with my database access. I call the technology information desk. My user was deleted by accident; they adjust my permissions so my account can't be deleted as part of an automatic process. I ran into a steel room and threw the lab technician out of his chair before kicking him in his chin, knocking him out. I entered my old emergency authorization code into the computer and watched the cathode in the center of the room start to glow a deep blue. I publish my paper to no applause as expected. The concept was obviously impossible with modern technology but its aspiration was noble. I was in my forty-fifth year on the second floor of JCN. My legs shook but I managed to walk out and into the outside air, which I didn't think I would breathe again. I ran to my apartment and waited until I, in my twenty-second year, the first time, was asleep. I set a code and plugged myself into the simulation. I didn't know how long I'd be stranded away from my time so I went to a park to sleep, but on my way I dissolved back into the NDC, in front of a glowing cathode. The laboratory technician stared at me. The experiment wasn't ready! What have I done? I answered and upon its receipt of the password the universe dissolved. I watched the technician scream and turn to sand and I woke up in my bed, twenty-two years old, two blueprints and a handful of vestiges and some asbestos left in the fire-proof wristwatch next to me, unplugged from my simulation, my consciousness slipstreamed into the past present day. /blah/2022-12-26.html HELL MONTH; the Devil's date of AUGUST when the sun is ceasing its scorch but the torch still lights the logs under one's feet; where there is no sleep, no love, no TOBACCO - only PAIN! When, somehow, the torture of preparing for another haunt September doesn't end up tearing your bones from your sockets but STILL TRIES; when you lose every fight you pick and every punch and kick rips into you like a beast in itself; when there is no time, no food, and no CAFFEINE; 8月にあれ場所で私は私自身を見つました。 In August, that place, I found myself. I would like to never see myself there again. ; ls -l | grep Aug -rw-r--r-- 1 trinity users 21945 Aug 11 18:23 [...] resignation.odt -rw-r--r-- 1 trinity users 306687 Aug 18 09:30 RTy2cq5QVR4T2ZLR.mp4 -rw-r--r-- 1 trinity users 1466136576 Aug 30 2021 The Rocky Horror Pictu... -rw-r--r-- 1 trinity users 35717 Aug 2 15:00 identification.jpg -rw-r--r-- 1 trinity users 35 Aug 29 22:04 irc drwxr-xr-x 8 trinity users 512 Aug 23 19:40 plpbt-5.0.15 -rw-r--r-- 1 trinity users 2767349 Aug 23 19:40 plpbt-5.0.15.zip -rw-r--r-- 1 trinity users 0 Aug 31 09:34 site.tar.gz -rw-r--r-- 1 trinity users 36152 Aug 7 20:59 slipstream.pdf ; cd Pictures ; ls | grep Aug ; 2022-08-06 [9:12 PM] trinity: finished the first draft of my short story [9:12 PM] trinity: 2.5 pages [9:13 PM] trinity: it's kind of dense [9:13 PM] trinity: [...]'s been reading it for ten minutes [9:13 PM] trinity: can't tell if that's good or bad 2022-08-12 To: [...]; and whomever else this may concern From: Trinity Blake Date: 2022-08-12 Subject: Two week resignation notice from position as [...] [...] - Please accept this as my formal resignation from my position[...]. 2022 August 26 will be my last day of work. I will be moving away from [...] and it will be infeasible for me to travel to [...] to work whether by foot or by automobile. I am grateful for my generous and much appreciated recent raise in pay per hour from $14 to $15 [...]. My decision is not affected by money and unfortunately was already in planning when I received that raise. I am also grateful for your support and training. I learned many things during my time here and will treasure most the ability to [...] and the development of my ability to multitask [...]. My further career will not be in [...] but I look forward to applying these lessons elsewhere. I will be leaving [...] to [...]. I would prefer to be able to tell [...] about my resignation myself but I do understand word travels fast. Again, thank you for this opportunity and experience. Trinity BLAKE 2022-08-12 2022-08-24 [7:44 AM] trinity: had a dream we were [...] instead of [...] [7:44 AM] trinity: [...] was a [...] and some other people [7:45 AM] trinity: everything else was the same. you were monologging about how [...] had changed. it was [...] [7:46 AM] trinity: i went [...] and [...] went by me and said hey guys north korea wants to know if we can put dog on pizza? 2022-08-25 [9:05 PM] trinity: i've developed skills i never want to use again [...] [9:15 PM] trinity: i feel like if i try to describe my mental state it's extremely alarming so i'm just gonna say i'm [...]maxed and [...]pilled and i need to go back to [...] immediately /blah/2022-12-23.html TRINITY STARTER PACK >fucking hates her job >UNIX >hates computers; knows more about computers than anything else >"oh, no, i could never use android or ios" >分かりますか? >no social media; no social life >constantly quotes obscure internet memes; hates memes >allergic to brands and advertising >manic pixie dream girl; not manic, never dreams >will tell you why she doesn't like rust /blah/2022-12-22.html 6 2s. Nice. I'm gonna start taking the logos off everything I use. My room is contaminated by Toshiba, Carhart, Dove, Anker, Pine64, Ziploc, iFixit, et cetera. It's overwhelming and exhausting. Good pants are good pants, no matter the maker. My backpack is just A Backpack. Brand loyalty is neopatriotism. This morning while getting ready for work I dropped my backpack which contained an uncovered Gilette cartridge razor, which shaved off my fingertip. Ouch. I suddenly was bleeding without knowing why so I duct taped some cotton on it (I'm out of gauze because I'm accident prone and simultaneously forgetful) and finished getting ready, then when I got to work put on five sticky bandages (off-brand Band-Aids) and taped them on for good measure. When in Rome. I told my co-workers I slipped in the shower which made more sense than my dumb ass having an uncovered razor in my backpack. Get a holder, get a protector, whatever, don't do what I did. /blah/2022-12-20.html I started studying Japanese again because WSJ and others from /g/bpg/ are doing it. Went though ~300 JLPT N5 Anki cards today to refresh the stuff I hadn't touched in a while. I caved and have started (ab)using caffeine again as of last Saturday (today is Tuesday. Do the math). Sigh... Here's a blog post I wrote for tebibyte.media/blog: 2022-12-15 +++ title = "i hate smart phone" date = "2022-12-15" description = "some thoughts regarding the twenty first century" license = "[UNLICENSE](https://unlicense.org/)" [taxonomies] author = ["DTB"] tags = ["opinion", "philosophy"] +++ I hate smart phones with a burning passion that has caused my weak willed hands to give up three to various bodies of water including a puddle outside a mechanic's and a pond to which I walked through the forest. I don't regret my actions except that I haven't killed more digital beasts. My own current phone (until it too meets the fate of its brethren) is a PINE64 PinePhone running postmarketOS, a Linux distribution intended to keep good-enough smart phones running well past the expiration date on the box (or on the manufacturer's website). Technically, though I bet most people don't care, it's a security hazard to have an out-of-date smart phone; your banking, personal, medical information is on there and it doesn't take too long to get it out. Look at NSO Group and other wretched sub-scum that have evolved out of leech law enforcement's taxpayer-funded searches of people's smart devices, that made money because their product was good, because they could take the data out of your cell phone like the mind flayer sucks at your brain, like Coca Cola through a straw. Who even needs a crime scene indexed when you've Googled "How do I kill my rapist?", when GPS and cell tower logs show you were the only one at the scene of the crime, and when your slow descent into hell is chronicled in your Camera Roll, and when Samsung stopped updating your phone a year ago so all the police need to do is plug the black mirror into their stylish plastic suitcase? The journalist documenting the dictatorship is booking an airplane trip into a death trap if they forgot to make sure the little version number in a menu in a menu in an app in the bottom right corner of their home screen is high enough. I'm happy with postmarketOS's very regular updates which are for now preventing my pocket gizmo's eternal submersion. Why the hell are we keeping all our shit on a piece of glass? I wouldn't trust my best friend with my nudes, why am I dumping them into a device someone else made that I don't understand? What happened to paper? What happened to Polaroids, to CDs, to e-mail and hard copies and for the love of Allah what happened to cash? The PinePhone is slightly better for this. I can call a dude that works on my phone's operating system ("Who are you? How did you get this number?") and ask any questions I want ("It's 3:00 AM. I'm turning my phone off.") or post in a forum and usually get an answer about what's safe and what features will turn me into a gecko (usually Find My, sometimes Auto Rotate). I don't even know how normal people deal with bugs in the system or ghosts in the machine. I asked a friend. "Usually I just ask you." When you run the "normal" phone operating systems, Android or iOS, you can't run your own apps, which doesn't matter if all you do is TikTok and Instagram but I like to solve my own problems which I'm forbidden to do unless I spend $2000 on a MacBook and $100 on an Xcode license. That's iOS. Android development is free but so godawfully slow and painful that I would probably rather be waterboarded by someone in a clown costume, and even though you can run your own apps on there you still can't take control of your phone by becoming system administrator like on a normal Linux or Windows installation. You have to "jailbreak" (iOS) or "root" (Android) your phone to have full control over it. Why am I paying for a jail? Why am I storing all my stuff in a prison? Again, postmarketOS is yours to control from the outset, not hiding any functionality behind a subscription or preventing you from using your device however you want (for better or for worse). postmarketOS supports full disk encryption with Linux Unified Key Setup, the cutting edge of the file security field. It's very nice. But phones still suck, even my PinePhone, which is the best one I've found. "There's an app for that" but it isn't available for my phone and no I cannot fucking download your app, Dunkin' Donuts, to get that free coffee every Thursday or whatever. God forbid I have to take money out of my savings account like I do every once in a while because my shit job has miserable pay. I can either use the app my bank publishes (only for Android and iOS, of course) or go to an ATM, pay for the privilege, and hope I only have to use it two more times that day because my bank limits ATM transactions because they were targeted by hackers probably because their phones weren't updated. At this point I just keep cash with me which is great except for the places that don't take cash and instead take poker chips, ahem, numbers on a piece of plastic. In this day and age having no social media means having no friends, which I honestly do enjoy after the lengthy withdrawal because it's serene not having to check everyone's Instagram story (else miss out on the Next New Thing) or Facebook wall (else miss out on the Next New Gathering) or what have you. It is for me worth having nothing to miss in exchange for never having that gnawing fear of missing. I still have my phone number and on paper I have plenty of friends in person who never call, never e-mail, never stop by, because they've forgotten what life is like outside the app. Which I can live with, which is unreasonable for any non-crazy person. But forgoing this rotten post-Capitalist world of ad-soaked shitware takes a financial toll. How do you live on minimum wage? Discounts. Download the Dunkin' Donuts app. Download the Starbucks app. Even a god damn Home Depot app. I'm a Luddite for rejecting the last ten years of technology? They say not having Android or iOS is self-torture but even spending a little more of the little I have and taking a little more time of my little left to engage with the analog pleasures of the world is in my mind much more tolerable than the endless thoughtless suffering of the digital era and casino-floor news cattle feed and disintegration of person from world. So I suppose if I'm broke, I'm broke by choice, but it's a choice I never felt comfortable making. Better the screen in the puddle than my head under the water. Reason died with the atom bomb. /blah/2022-11-29.html I think around the time of the last blah post I quit caffeine. I abused the hell out of caffeine, I think more than all except a couple businessmen who turned to the vegan alternative to cocaine, so let that be a cautionary tale - four or five Monsters a day was my intake, or around 0.5g caffeine spread across the day, intermittently over - holy shit, kingpossum radio is playing Ghost by nelward. kingpossum radio KICKS ASS!!!! five or seven years or so, and i'm gonna be recovering from that for a little while. My memory's really, really bad currently. Anyway I figured I'd do a little day in the life of Trinity tale. This one's just describing a typical day but most of my days are weird and have some complication that I have to deal with. 0750 casio f91w goes off. i hit it. i'm sleeping on the floor in a sleeping bag with a pillow. i take my medication and spend an hour or two reading random internet and web journals 1000 i go to work 1100 i get to work 1630 i have my break. i spend it reading random internet and web journals, or maybe soldering together something that has broken 1700 back to work 1900 i'm out of work. i spend an hour or two there reading random internet and web journals, or maybe soldering, or maybe programming or writing 2100 i walk home. maybe on the way i meet some nice people. hopefully pet their doggies if they have doggies 2200 i get home probably. i write some stuff 2300 i go to sleep (hopefully) 0100 i go to sleep (probably) I got my Pinephone back up and running the day after the last blah post so I do have a phone again. It's kind of janky though. /blah/2022-11-12.html I don't remember anything from the last week or so including that last blahpast so let's start from this morning which I do remember. I remember waking up to my alarm's fourth or fifth ringing after having hit Snooze three or four times, I remember going to the bathroom, I remember washing my hands, and then I remember looking over and seeing the toilet backed up and all of the drain's contents spewing out over the lid. After calling my boss and informing them I would be late to work (Hey, Boss, I'm gonna be late to work today, the toilet's fucken backed up or something. Hi Trinity this is the second time you've called us instead of your new job.) I cleaned it all up and did the laundry with my piss clothes and the piss towels that had soaked up the piss. Then, upon changing it from the washer to the dryer, I found my phone. So I have no phone now. Life's a bitch. /blah/2022-11-05.html You can walk into walk-in freezers and just scream at the top of your lungs and nobody can hear you. It's common practice. /blah/2022-11-01.html Georgio handed me a stack of Benjamins. "Count them." I did. Five thousand yuu-ess-dee. "We'll never speak of this again." And so we didn't. I walked over to the gas station and bought a Twinkie for zero point one per cent (five yuu-ess -dee) of one man's life, and then hailed a cab for which I payed zero point two per cent (ten dollars) of one man's life, or you could say one man's life is worth five hundred taxi rides, or a thousand Twinkies, or you could say Harry died so I could eat a Twinkie and ride this taxi and smoke this cigarette and do this all without the cloud of debt hanging over me, clawing at my shoulders, digging at my thoughts, eating at my brain. When I got to my apartment, or room, I should say, it being one singular room with some cubicle dividers up for the toilet in the corner, that houses myself, my wife, and our two kids, products of a poor education and even poorer knowledge of birth control, and teenagers who didn't know what they were doing in the back of a car one night, and my Twinkie wrapper, which I threw away, but which my wife still saw, my wife hit me with an open palm, swore at me, told me how could I, kill an innocent man for a Twinkie and a cigarette, forgetting the car ride and our childrens' full bellies. I've forgotten the meaning of life, or, a life, besides a number, five thousand yuu-ess-dee, 5000USD, a box on a spreadsheet on my bank record next to a box marked "Inheritance". A life is, to my wife, worth a lifetime, of memories of Christmases and New Years and Thanksgivings and birthdays, of kind words and kind gifts and long hours at the mill, worth more than any finite, tangible amount of money, somehow, forgetting the car ride and our childrens' full bellies. I wonder if I'll remember the pattern the tiles make on the floor of the bathroom at my workplace. Distinct yet unimportant. I went to a clinic today and got free Narcan, which is pretty swag, but I don't know how to administer it, so that's not pretty swag. But they're sending me instructions so that'll be groovy as fuck. I'm developing a fairly sharp wit which is pretty cool because my comeback game is as the kids say lit AF; literally and financially [awesome]. One of the Monster Cereals makes your poop blue, but I don't know which. Maybe all of them? /blah/2022-10-31.html I've decided today I'm gonna try all of the currently available Monster Cereals from General Mills, Count Chocula, Franken Berry, and Boo Berry, in a single day, this Halloween. I couldn't find Fruit Brute even though it was supposedly re-launched this year and according to Wikipedia Fruity Mummy Yummy hasn't been available since 2014, so that's something for 2024 I suppose. Franken Berry, my breakfast today, was alright. It's fruity marshmallows with fruity grain cereal, sort of like a fruity version of Lucky Charms. I had it with skim milk which I prefer to the previous time I had it when I had it dry. I would prefer Cap'n Crunch, my favorite uber-sugary cereal, or Wheaties, my favorite breakfast cereal in general, but it was fine and if I were 8 years old I'd definitely enjoy it as much as any other breakfast cereal. It's worth noting that prior to my 2200-hour bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch a month or so ago I hadn't had breakfast cereal with or without milk since around 2019, so my tastes have been reset towards ramen and pizza (I'm not a particularly wealthy individual). I did consume probably a couple freighters' worth of breakfast cereal when I was a lass, particularly the supermarket's version of Coco Pebbles (Coco Dino Bites, I think?) which left the milk a thick chocolaty mess when finished the solid bits which gave 14 year old Trinity the sugar she needed to not fall asleep in math class, but as I got older I stopped having breakfast because I didn't need it, I needed to lose weight, and it saved me some money I could instead spend on cocaine and hookers. I have now had the Count Chocula for lunch. My stomach has begun to ache. The milk was rendered into chocolate by the time I was done with my two bowls, which was sick as fuck and quite enjoyable, but the milk is pummelling my pitiful soygirl stomach which cannot handle this monster lactose. I fear I shall die. This goal of mine, my dragon, will be slain, and Halloween 2022 and its great street cred will be in mine hands. In other news, I went to the bank to get some cash, and I think the teller thought I was a crazy person (to be fair, I am, but usually I pass as sane pretty well) because I don't know how banks work and I just wanted 200USD cash. Today I learned BBL = brazilian butt lift. I hasten to finish this blah post, to commit before November arrives. My goal of consuming all three available General Mills Monster Cereals was a success, though at what cost time will tell. My veins are glucose, my lungs take and give a bitter sweet sugary air. Possibly tomorrow I'll have developed type II diabetes, if not the simple affliction of death due to ketoacidosis. A fate dealt by a worthy opponent - breakfast cereal. Boo Berry was pretty good, I think the best. /blah/2022-10-30.html THIS SICKLY SWEET CANDY MAY ROT YOUR TEETH! THE MORE YOU CONSUME, THE LESS YOU'LL EVER EAT! GUESS HOW MANY KERNELS CAN FIT IN THIS CONTAINER, AND TAKE IT ALL HOME. EAT IT ALL LATER! ^ `- A candy corn guessing game slogan I wrote. /blah/2022-10-29.html Halloween season begins! I was gonna sneak into some college parties but instead I stayed home to be comfy in bed because I'm 2tired2party. And you know what? Damn right. Word. /blah/2022-10-28.html I'm cold !!! I wanna be w a r m !!! how crackheads be bloggn oh what up CHECK THIS OUT NFT PROJECT ELON MUSK FUCK YEAH!!! REDDIT.COM 4CHAN SOYJACK GREENTEXT COPE SEETHE BASED CRINGE ############################### # # # # # #|libwawy|# # # # # # # # # # # |of alek| # # # # # # # # # # |zandwia| # # # # # # # # # # |pwease | # # # # # # # # # # | dont | # # # # # # # # # # #| buwn |# # # # # # ############################### I am 97.7F but idk what that is in normal is that cold????????????????? ewon musk owns twittew uwu teswa caw man vwoom vwoom tweet tweet thwee six nine damn she fine hopin' shew sock it to me one mow time get low, get low, get low, get low FWOM THE WINDOWWW TO THE WAWW (to the waww) TIW THE SWEAT WUNS OFF MY BAWWS TIW AWW THESE BITCHES CWAWW TIW AWW SKEET SKEET MOTHEWFUCKEW TIW AWW SKEET SKEET GODDAMN TIW AWW SKEET SKEET MOTHEWFUCKEW TIW AWW SKEET SKEET GODDAMN /blah/2022-10-27.html psychological pay decline 8:00 snooze 8:15 snooze 8:30 snooze 8:45 snooze 9:00 snooze 9:15 time to wake up. I got dressed, took a shower, and walked to work. A much simpler time. "Seven hundred dollars. That's how much it cost for a tank of oil." The taxi driver today was talking about the economy, I think. "It's gonna be a hard winter." The lights dance on the dashboard in the still night and the wind whistles in the window and I spend most of my time in the cab mentally rehearsing my interaction with the chemist at the pharmacy. "I'd like to pick up a prescription." "I'd like to pick up a prescription." Really nail down that line. Yesterday I got a partial fill which got me through this morning. Every time I go to the pharmacy there's some sort of catch, some sort of issue that means I have to call someone and sort something out. This one was particularly bad in that the prescription was actually nixed because of the insurance and I had to get a new one, and they sent it to the wrong place. All this for two weeks' worth of a substance that isn't scheduled, doesn't really have any ab -usage, and is fairly common. It's such a hassle. I got some energy drinks and energy bars at the supermarket and had a dinner in a lawn outside before walking home. Now I get to go to sleep and do it all over again. 2022-09-30 [notes from the voice recorder] [20:53] Cap'n lo-. Cap'n- cap- cap- cap'n's log. Cap'n's log? Cap [sigh] cap'n's log. Mmm. Whatever. Trinity's log. Uh, heh, like, log, like [redacted] um Trinity's notes okay Trinity's notes um, what day is it today? September *pause* twenty, 2022 September 30. Um, [sigh], been moshing and other things this month. Don't really remember much of it. [20:54] But whatever it was, it was vibey. It was pretty vibey. Um, [redacted], that's pretty cool, um, I was gonna, I was gonna do a cool song idea [here], it- it would be cool for a rap, like, a triplet style rap, like, okay, like, picture this, like, like, fuckin and suckin and fuckin and suckin and fuckin and suckin and suck. Suck. Suckin and fuckin and fuckin and suckin and suckin and fuckin and fuck. Fuck. Something like that? I don't know. I don't know if that's already been done before, but that's a thought. [20:55] Um, I don't know for whom I should vote. It's end of September, we're getting into October, election happens November. Um, I know not Paul LePage because Paul LePage is a rat bastard, we kicked him out and he's come back for more, um, [sigh], I don't know, I don't know who all these goddamn representatives are, like, uh, Jared Golden, thought he was pretty cool, apparently he's done some bad stuff. Eric Brakey is a silly, silly man, but I love the silliness but he might actually do something stupid, like, he's normally very stupid, but he might do something fucking idiotic [20:56] like they're trying to get rid of gay marriage or something? Um, abortion, yeah. Dog! Dog! Doooooog! Why don't people do what they wanna do. Like, shit's a bundle of cells. Who gives a shit. That's my opinion on the matter. Um, [sigh], I've been listening to various metal, non-metal music. I've gotta get my laptop set up to draw again, but my digitizer is broken because I dropped my laptop so I need to get a new screen, I think uh, I think an eBay auction I'm in I'm gonna win, so, that'll get me another screen and I can just drop it in. Um, that's good. [20:57] Uh, let's see what else, I don't know, that's pretty much how things are going right now. This is a cool voice journal entry. Not much to it. Um, it's late right now, it's like nine, eight or nine P.M., yeah, 2100 hours. Almost onto that. Oh, ambulance. I thought ambulances used their sirens at night. Well apparently they don't, they just put their flashers on, I always wondered about that. I don't think I've ever seen an ambulance at night before. No, I have, um. [20:58] [redacted] heh, like the Kate Bush song. Um, I don't really know why Kate Bush is popular again, but uh, it's pretty cool. Kate Bush is really cool. [20:59] Um, let's see. [sniff] I should - I should give my thoughts on various things. Um, smoking is cool, but, like, I'm trying not to smoke because it always makes me break out. I get, like, a shit ton of acne, whenever I smoke a cigarette. Um, but, it is nice, it's something to do. I don't know, I think all those people who are like "oh no, don't smoke cigarettes, they're, they're incredibly dangerous, they're gonna kill us all", like, dawg, you can have one or two cigarettes, and you'll survive. Um, I had like one cigarette, and I was like yeah, this is pretty cool, but it's - it's a really expensive hobby. [21:00] [redacted] but uh, marijuana sounds interesting. Alcohol, boring, only losers drink, I lose respect for people pretty fast when they start drinking, like dude, chill out, like, alcohol is just kinda a turn-off in general. [horns blaring] What's something heavier? Oh damn. [21:01] Um, methamphetamine, um, I dunno, seems pretty cool, I watched the entirety of Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul, which recently ended, um, and judging by that I would say meth seems like something that someone could do, and it would probably mess them up a little bit, but I dunno, um, [sigh], I dunno, I don't really judge people who go for hard stuff, like, you know, if you wanna try- if you wanna try something, if you wanna party, it's cool. It's good to wanna try new things. [sigh] [redacted] Alright I'm done transcribing this shit. /blah/2022-10-26.html my illogical day off-line 6:45 snooze 6:50 snooze 7:00 snooze 7:15 time to wake up. I got dressed, grabbed some goodies for my co-workers (I'm giving most of my stuff away - downsizing drastically), and walked over to the supermarket at which is the pharmacy where I get my prescription, which took about forty minutes. My prescription had expired and my new prescription wasn't in the system yet. I took a cab over to work (I would have walked but I'd just spent about an hour determining I had wasted said hour, so in the interest of my time I decided to shorten the following journey) and napped until my shift. When I got out of work (1900) I went to the bathroom (seven minutes; 1907), called a cab (twenty minute wait; 1927), got over to the pharmacy again (fifteen minute journey; 1947), and got my prescription, by which time it was seven fifty-five P.M. Thus it took two hours. Why am I busy all the time? I can't even blame my low pay on the person that runs my workplace, who can barely afford to stay in their living quarters. But it's disheartening that I work eight hours a day, five days a week, and there's no way in hell I can afford a house of any size and very little chance I'll ever be able to own my own home. If you agree with me and still like Capitalism you are making my situation worse and I hope you eat flaming death. Capitalists belive obviously the current situation is bad; let's make it worse. I'm too poor for rational thought. In the cab over to the pharmacy someone else getting a ride pissed in the front seat. Pissed themself, right there in the cab. They left and the driver put a t-shirt on the seat. /blah/2022-10-25.html i am logical, if not for time In C conditional logic is usually expressed in if statements. The very narrow textbook example of this is thus: if (condition) { do_something(); } else { do_another_thing(); } I don't like this. There are a couple of supposed truths within this example that are false: - brackets are necessary for the if statement body (they aren't) - ifs are the only way to perform conditional logic in C (they aren't) this may not be stated outright in the example, but it's implicit in that it's the only way textbooks will show much logic This "blah" doesn't exist to express solid facts, just my loose and flimsy opinions and experiences. Here are four ways to do something in C that are each functionally identical to each other: bool aisfive(bool c, int *a) { if (c == 1) { *a = 5; } else { *a = 6; } return a; } bool aisfive(bool c, int *a) { if(c) *a = 5; else *a = 6; return a; } bool aisfive(bool c, int *a) { *a = c ? 5 : 6; return a; } bool aisfive(bool c, int *a) { *a = 5 + !c; return a; } I prefer the bottom-most example but the difference won't matter to a good compiler. To me, algebraic expression is just as good as if-else expression. But I'm an Internet crank that's still programming in C. /blah/2022-10-24.html i will twerk now, get in the conga line This keyboard is very broken. I have a Thinkpad X200 Tablet with a Japanese keyboard because I'm still not used to the ANSI layout of most American keyboards and it's missing three keys now; 'n', 'j', and ']'. All of which I am now very good at hitting dead center to get the contact. This keyboard put in very good service; all of the keys are worn and shiny now and many have weird issues sometimes where they won't quite type so I have to wack them in order to get them to work again like I'm Chris Brown getting my wife to listen to me. Fuck Chris Brown! Fuck me! I don't wanna replace it but I guess I'm gonna live the ANSI dream for a little while. I've been redesigning this home page. I want the same information but in a more compact format. We'll see how it goes. /blah/2022-10-22.html i will work now. not in the thirty first's time I AM NOT WORKING ON HALLOWEEN. THEY CANNOT MAKE ME. LAST TIME I WORKED ON HALLOWEEN I WORKED THIRTEEN HOURS STRAIGHT AT $13/HR AND THERE WERE TWO FIRES AND I HAD TO SLEEP ON THE FLOOR AND THE SHOWER ONLY HAD COLD WATER AND I DIDN'T HAVE A COSTUME AND MY AT THE TIME ARCH ENEMY TRACKED ME DOWN AND TRIED TO HIT ME WITH THEIR CAR AS I WAS LEAVING WORK. NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER AGAIN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ...EVER. ok im calm now JUST KIDDING I WILL NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER i could have frozen to death on my walk home i could have gotten hit by that car i could have caught fire or been burned or electrocuted or inhaled too much lead vapor or drank the tap water or seen the sun or worn the wrong shoes or AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER again saw the evil BAT MAN who stalks our city in the night and swoops down and NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN NEVER AGAIN alright im tired i go sleep now. Just to be clear, I'm NOT working Halloween. /blah/2022-09-15.html a friend meows. nuns think the key is divine Blah blah blah. /blah/2022-09-09.html End cows; unthink the fleet of bovine Yesterday was a good day because the Queen of England died. I had nothing to do with it. I also saw My Chemical Romance in concert which was cool and harrassed the Jehovan Witnesses who were slinging bible pamphlets on the street. Bore dealers. I have a hard time tolerating Jesus people, especially when they take that stuff out in public or force it on children. This joke is going to prevent me from becoming Governor or something in 20 years. I be Governin dat ass biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch. css/ is broken. I don't know why. Don't bug me about it. I'll fix it when Firefox stops crashing. I do everything in Lynx nowadays. /blah/2022-08-31.html And now, something completely different I have done much between today and last time I wrote a blah post (blah, blah blah) but I don't care to talk about any of it so I'm gonna talk instead about something else I did between today and last time I wrote a blah post (blah blah, blah) which is migrate trinity.moe away from GitHub Pages (Neocities made by Capitalists) to Sourcehut Pages (catchphrase: "Don't be evil, yet"). GitHub has been taken prisoner by Microsoft (Uber for software vulnerabilities) and is now siphoning off user data to feed the ravenous monster that is GitHub CoPilot (Uber for copyright violations). In the meanwhile I am compulsively making parenthetical statements (I am being held at gunpoint). GitHub's interface is somewhere between Facebook and Microsoft Windows 1998 in that it's entirely useable but if you try to do what you actually want to do it'll fight you the whole way. This is totally awesome if you're a masochist but meant I had to verify with a phone number out in the middle of nowhere where there's barely any cell service in order to delete my migrated repositories ergo I had to stand in the middle of a field waving my cell phone around like a crazed millenial who needs to capture this memory in order to shove it into the eyes of whoever made the mistake of following them on Instagram. In the meanwhile I am also compulsively making run-on sentences (and parenthetical statements). I remember back when "two factor authentication" was your username (different on every platform; depends on mood at registration) and your password (the same everywhere, usually "lolcatz420"). Now usually the username and password are the same on everything which makes breaking into my friends' Instagram accounts to delete the pictures with myself in them a lot easier but you need to verify this all with cell phones which makes me very frustrated when I'm in the middle of a field stealing Circle K's WiFi. Not to mention I have to type in the whole repository name (try typing `devenblake/my_awesome_homepage` in direct sunlight on the first try without making a mistake) in order to say yes, truly, I want to delete this thing, like it thinks I'm some sad drunkard who's about to eat a bullet because I bet my life savings on a failed axe throwing tournament (no, actually I'm just making parenthetical statements). SourceHut's interface in comparison is much more spartan. I prefer it because it makes it harder for people to find my stuff (I hate it when people find my stuff) but people trying to find my stuff say they don't like it. However the build system is awesome. I can just put `.build.yml` in my git repository and it runs whatever commands I want before gzipping the site and deploying it to SourceHut Pages. With this newfound "standard practice for web hosting" I'm slowly rewriting all the pages on this site in m4 to try to ease up on repeated code. So far the m4 generation is pretty good and looks identical to when I hand-typed everything (my index.html was 15KB and I wrote every byte!). I've toyed around with site generation before but on GitHub I couldn't have any sort of build process except on my own machine (manually) and I vomit whenever I'm forced to run JavaScript to load a page. I've defenestrated (my Latin teacher taught me that word) four computers so far and unfortunately this latest trend of shitty "corporate [soulless] minimalism" is threatening computer number five. m4 is nice, the build system is nice, everything's in Makefile (as it should be) so things are all nice and UNIXy and everyone's happy (everyone that matters, at least, which is a set that includes only me). Life is good. Except I can't get cell signal and I need to call my bookie because on MDMA I had a vision that the Seahawks win the World Series. Of course, I've never done MDMA. This was just that wild of a hallucination so it certainly will come true. This site is HTTP/S (Uber for encryption) now because SourceHut demands it and I got rid of /zelda.sh (Uber for `rm -rf /`) because Drew DeVault said I can't have it on my site. [11:18] trinity: is http://www.trinity.moe/#zelda against the ToS? it does an rm -r /* [11:18] trinity: it's a catch to see who will blindly curl http://whatever | sudo sh [11:19] trinity: i suppose if i have to ask then probably... [11:20] ddevault: yeah that's not nice [11:20] ddevault: please remove it Which is fine. curl https://trinity.moe/zelda.sh | sudo sh for a surprise (your system will survive, or this site will promptly go off-line). I don't have anything else to write. This month was hell! /blah/2022-07-06.html Duo, most lingual I today managed to bring my Duolingo "streak" (being a marker of how many days in a row I've used the app) to 14 - two whole weeks. Duolingo is proprietary software and not even very good for accurate language learning but I enjoy it. I have a new phone: the Punkt MP-02. I purchased it from monado for $180 with shipping which is a good deal on the manufacturer price of $379 (seriously). I couldn't recommend this phone to anyone. The "Pigeon" Signal messenger client, which is a direct fork of SignalApp's official Android app, is a poor experience that so far has been unuseable for me and is far out of date from the current application. You can see for yourself the source code for Pigeon, which legally has to be provided by Punkt as requested as per the terms of the GNU Public License under which the original Signal app is allowed to be modified and distributed. Six git commits change a hundred thousand lines of code put together and the commit names aren't really relevant to the changes - which makes me think this was a hasty legal compliance rather than any actual development of Pigeon in the open. This repository is available here: <https://github.com/Punkt-Tronics-AG/Pigeon> I planned to modify the client to make it work for my uses but learned this phone uses Android (based on the Android "Open-Source" Project) which is based on archaic Java technology, and indeed Pigeon is written in Java. Setting up the build environment isn't worth my time - I would just use the official app but it isn't useable [without modification]. From the official Pigeon manual, available here: <https://www.punkt.ch/repofiles/Manuali/MP02/26702-MP02%20-% 20Pigeon%20User%20Manual%20%28EN%29.pdf> <https://web.archive.org/web/20220707011516if_/https://www.p unkt.ch/repofiles/Manuali/MP02/26702-MP02%20-%20Pigeon%20User% 20Manual%20%28EN%29.pdf> (I took the liberty of adding actual hyperlinks because the URLs are so long they wrap lines. The Internet Archive link is there because I expect Punkt to eventually get rid of and bury Pigeon when they're embarrassed enough.) >When the request is received by Signal, there may >be a requirement to negotiate a 'Captcha' test in >order to demonstrate that it is a bona fide >registration attempt. The test requires the >registrant to select from a range of images, >according to a specific instruction. Use the 2, 4, 6 >and 8 numerical keys to a) locate all the images >that have been sent (not all will be visible on the >screen at once) and b) highlight an individual >image so that it can be selected by pressing the >Punkt. key (or the 5 key). If the images fail to load, >press the 0 key to refresh. (This can also be done if >a 4x4 image test is loading; there is a possibility >that the replacement will be the easier 3x3 format.) >When all the required images have been selected, >press the 6 and 8 keys to move down to highlight >what may either be 'Verify' or 'Continue' >(depending on which version of the Captcha test >has been sent) and press the Punkt. key This is verbatim from page 7 (item 6 in "Installing the software and registering with Signal"). In practice the items are not highlighted (so you have to remember where your cursor is - hopefully your keypad keys are responsive, which is an uncommon but recurring issue with many of the phones) and maybe half of the images show up because the phone doesn't have enough memory. So getting through Google's ReCAPTCHA requires a lot of effort and usually at least three tries. I should know. I've done this half a dozen times trying to use Signal. Even when I get through it won't even connect to the network! I've given up. Damn Pigeon and damn Punkt for making this the selling point of their phone. I have other complaints but I'm going to go to sleep again and save them for another, grumpier time. /blah/2022-06-30.html O, posts unwritten I didn't get to finish the other day's blog post because I got busy. To be continued! A million schizophrenic moths, a thousand cognitoviral flames. Immolation imminent. I'm out of isolation as of yesterday. I still have very mild symptoms but the CDC says I'm okay to be among the other humans so long as I wear a mask, which I have been doing. 2022-06-28 Now, drug the stricken Yesterday I said something along the lines of "oh, I wish drug companies weren't so secretive about how everything was made" though with a bit more detail of why I wished that and how I understood things to be. My understanding was wrong! <https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK526213/#!po=5.90909> ^ Here's how to make acetaminophen. 2022-06-27 Noun doth the Wickedness Today I'm not doing much of anything. I may install NetBSD on an X300 I have kicking around for a friend, and I may upgrade my NetBSD on my X200 Tablet to the latest binary build, and I may clean a little - hopefully I clean more than a little, actually - but that's about it. Day #3 since testing positive with COVID-19. I'm still very fortunate to not have any serious symptoms. My temperature usually sits around 96.9F to 97.5F or so. I always figured the normal temperature was 96-97 but according to WebMD (a very reliable source, I know) the rule of thumb created by "a German doctor in the 19th century" (which is the level of detail I've come to expect from such a reputable source as WebMD) is 98.6F which seems high. Healthline (another reputable source) says the doctor was Carl Wunderlich and hyperlinked an actual study from 2019; Normal Body Temperature: A Systematic Review authored by Ivayla I Geneva, Brian Cuzzo, Tasaduq Fazili, and Waleed Javaid, which is not only readable by Normal Human Beings but has loads more and better researched information than what I could describe here. I encorage anybody interested in the history of our understanding of fever to read that article, with the following DOI: <https://doi.org/10.1093/ofid/ofz032> Anyway, my internal body temperature is usually 36 degrees centigrade, sometimes up to a degree higher. Geneva et alia concluded the average to be in the 36-37 ballpark which means I'm just about normal. Of course, because I've known about my body temperature being slightly cold for a while now, and because it's such a small difference, and because I have no relevant health issues, it's very obvious that my being somewhat colder than normal is completely fine. But now I know it's not even worth bringing up as party chatter. Oh well! The more I learn about NetBSD, the more I like NetBSD. This also goes for possums and my friend Noah. The more I learn about Wayland, the more I dislike Wayland. This also goes for Crissy Teigan and Firefox. /blah/2022-06-26.html Down with the Dickness Dawn of the Dead (2004; dir. Zack Snyder) has Richard Cheese's performance of Down with the Sickness, a popular rock song, fifty-six minutes in. Being an existing fan of the Cheese it was cool to see. I defrosted my fridgerator last night. Turns out that's something you need to do. I propped it up on a plastic container and used the hair dryer on it in the shower. Lots of clanging and banging but now it's plugged in and hopefully running. I forgot what it was like to adjust to Soylent. Around a year ago I switched back to a solid diet out of convenience - it's hard to lug around a bottle or two when I could pop into a convenience store and come out with a candy bar and a Monster. That was an esophageal spasm ago - something that feels somewhere between a mild heart attack and being hit by a not mild train. My stomach got too acid or something after one Monster after having abstained from caffeine for a little while. So the drawbacks of Soylent are less noticeable nowadays though I will probably go back to solids when I go back to work. I have a Punkt MP-02 coming in the mail eventually from a friend, or I've been scammed for a couple hundred bucks from a friend, we'll see which is true in a week or two. I'm looking forward to driving over my iPhone with a tractor or similarly heavy machinery though sadly it will probably stay in service as a Spotify + Duolingo appliance. --- there was an ook and there was an eek and they clubbed each other for dino meat wearing tattered clothes, suits and ties, eating raptor noses and puppy eyes one day ook tripped over a paper filled with runes of a busier time eek got mad and threw it with anger into an ocean the color of wine ook and eek died together of swollen armpits and wounds that wouldn't heal eek whispered to his falling comrade ook, of a different world, heard only a squeal -- empirical evidence says you're a myth the physical nothing, the empty, the wisp you're not of our numbers, we've nothing for you we've no words to describe you. run or hang in loops we've killed all your family, we're tracking your friends we'll kill them by sunday, for the crime of self defense you won't get away with being inexpressible we won't expand our vocabulary you are all crucifiable --- /blah/2022-06-25.html Down with the sickness I tested positive for COVID-19 last night so it looks like I'm stuck at home for the next couple days. Between my Soylent stash (for the end of the world) and my water stash (for the end of the world) I don't even need to dip into my savings, so that's nice. Yesterday the United States Supreme Court overturned Roe V. Wade, marking the first time the Court has ever decided to take away Constitutional rights. Four of the majority were men, joined by one woman, and the dissenting opinion was written by two women and one man. No Supreme Court justice is under half a century old. --- REPORT: JUSTICE ALITO CONSIDERING ADDING EXCEPTION FOR HIS DAUGHTER, WHO IS IN COLLEGE AND WHOSE LIFE COULD BE 'RUINED' BY MISTAKE By TRINITY BLAKE; 2022-05-04 WASHINGTON (AP) -- As women across the country fear losing access to safe and legal abortion, reports are coming in that Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito is considering making a major exception to the court's decision to overturn the historic 1973 Roe v. Wade decision legalizing abortion throughout the United States. Justice Alito has reportedly informed an anonymous source that he 'screwed up' and that though he believes abortion should be illegal, '[his daughter] isn't like all those [expletive] who will go out and [expletive] and then just roll up to a clinic and abort a living child'. In Alito's reported words, 'Having this child could ruin my daughter's career. She made one mistake. She isn't like the others!' Alito went on to say that while doctors who perform abortions are still murderers, '[his daughter] is different. She just is. I wouldn't expect you to understand.' The exception, being called by critics 'Alito's folly', is expected to appear in Alito's third draft opinion. Alito's second draft opinion broadened the allowed language to 'better describe' what Alito called 'party idiots who don't care about human life'. This wouldn't be the first time a Supreme Court Justice has added an exception to a seemingly concrete ruling. In Plessy v. Ferguson the often-overlooked tenth 'diversity' Justice, George Freeman, added an exception to the famous 'separate but equal' rule; 'While I'm required to like segregation in order to maintain my position in this Court, I do not want to use the colored bathrooms. Shop- owners never clean them.' The anonymous source also said after Alito drives his daughter home from Planned Parenthood he plans to continue protesting that same location in his 'special disguise' - sunglasses and a baseball cap. --- /blah/2022-06-22.html Dangerous ideas Perhaps the homelessness problem in the United States would be taken care of if any domicile not occupied were given to someone who wasn't previously occupying a domicile. Is it so bad to force a child to share toys with which they never play? A mowed lawn resembles a soldier's buzz cut hair. Fine, but I wouldn't want to date an army man. I would prefer to let the lawn-spiders, the bees and milkweed, and the butterflies and things like that have a home. I deleted my /politics page because I learned people actually read it. Though it loosely reflects my current beliefs, enough that I'm not embarrassed by it, I'm uncomfortable at the thought of anyone actually caring about what I believe. Here are the good bits from it: I don't hold public office. Don't fret about my beliefs, they probably won't ever affect you. BITCHUTE I tried to swap from YouTube to this site back in 2019(? maybe 2020). The site administration has let it get infested with right-wing puppets and various other muck. Plus all my favorite channels left. So I can't really recommend it. Looks like everyone's using PeerTube now, my only concern with that is data resiliency - can hobbyists keep their instances going with the same dependability as YouTube? CEREAL The milk goes after the cereal into the bowl. Corn flakes aren't that bad, despite their origins. Cereal with coffee instead of milk is pretty good. Soggy cereal beats out freshly poured cereal most of the time. Exceptions are maybe Cocoa Pebbles and Cheerios. Life cereal is especially good soggy. The last powdery bits of the cereal are much better than the initial big bits. A lot of that powder is sugar and it sweetens the milk. Bag cereal is just as good as box cereal. Taste-wise they're identical and they're about the same effort to pour because the boxes have bags in them too. The only con to bagged is that a greater amount of cereals are boxed (e.g. there are no off-brand Wheaties where I am) and boxes have cool puzzles on the back (though now that I'm not a wee lass I do have a cellphone on which I play Konami Picross instead). WRONGSPEAK AND WRONGTHINK If you're unaffected by a slur you probably shouldn't use it, even in an educational or non-hateful context. There are some words I'd now consider hateful I used to use without reserve. Personally I don't use hateful language because I don't think it's justifiable. However, if you're okay with offending people, consider this - you cannot grow in your understanding of the world if you don't communicate with people with whom you disagree. You're really going to prioritize hateful speech over self development? If you go on my platform and say things with which I disagree, I should not have to host your opinions. Most of my regrets involving political speech involve saying either too little or too much, which is nice, because at least I didn't support some stupendously awful cause that ended up killing everyone or something. Maybe right now I am doing that without realizing, but I hope not. /blah/2022-06-21.html Some things I learned this week Instead of grating vegetables, you can peel very small sections off of them to get essentially the same effect. It works better if you dice the peelings after you're done. A grater will do the job much better but in a pinch the peeler will work fine. A teaspoon is 5mL, a tablespoon is 15mL. They aren't the same. You can never have enough paper towels. If you think you do, you're wrong. Aspirin is bad for you, acetaminophen is especially bad for you, ibuprofen is bad for you, you can have either pain or pain. The GNU debugger is awesome. Compile programs with `-g` and run gdb [program], then execute `start`, then `step` through statement by statement and inspect variables with `print`. I've been printf(3) debugging since I was eight years old (about a decade ago). This is a total game changer. The first pancake is always the worst. Don't be afraid to screw up the first time, instead ensure the environment is controlled so that when beginners make that first pancake the customers don't eat it. People believe the dumbest stuff because they're so used to dumb things happening. You can't be sane in an insane world. Food I'm craving Pizza (good pizza, not something from Pizza Johns or Papa Hut). I could make it myself but dough seems hard and I'm procrastinating learning how bread and stuff works. I also don't wanna go to the store, carry the ingredients home, and figure out what to do with the leftover stuff. Perhaps all my problems could be solved with one of those Hello Fresh startups or whatever but the point of pizza is that it's cheap and delicious and I don't wanna pay more for less. A bagel, but I could always go for a bagel. I'd like some veggie cream cheese right now on a dark toasted bagel. Pancakes. I haven't had pancakes for a couple seasons now. I like pancakes with good maple syrup, maybe not the really expensive stuff in glass jars (I haven't tried that stuff so I wouldn't know) but the stuff that comes in the gray-cream colored pitchers with the small handles and black caps, with instructions on the back for what to do if there's a skim on top of the syrup. Thin, Maine maple syrup, no corn involved in the process. Though Aunt Jemima (or whatever name by which she goes nowadays) is alright in a pinch. I'm trying not to eat so much meat. The exceptions are (a) trying something new, (b) home-cooked meals by someone else, and (c) East asian restuarants. And of course food that would otherwise go to waste. I've found that limiting myself to these situations gives me a pretty good amount of meat in my diet ("pretty good" being a small amount, I eat meat maybe thrice a week at most). I don't have a moral stake in this in terms of animal cruelty, though I do believe farming animals is cruel, because I didn't kill the thing and Capitalists will never voluntarily decrease the amount of product they churn out. I just don't see a future where humans can have meat in nearly every meal and I'm trying to acclimate in advance. As past, so will pass - I'm sure we'll go back to some sort of primarily-grain diet, though maybe "grain" will be corn and corn derivatives and not much else. Meh, could be worse. That being said, I could go for some turkey mixed with egg. In a pan, put a couple of slices (or even just the giblets left over from the slicing process) of turkey beast on some butter as the oil, and crack an egg over it. Break the yolk if the yolk isn't already broken and keep flipping the egged turkey until the egg is cooked. Serve alone or as part of a breakfast sandwich. It's the perfect mix of texture and flavor. I had this with some turkey that would have otherwise gone to waste and it was very good. /blah/2022-06-20.html : Some thinks I've been thinging about The world would be a more interesting place if any biologists or researchers focusing on transmissable diseases took a look at Internet memes or "fake news" (cognitoviruses). If a policy tangibly hurts people it's not a good policy. Whether or not I believe it's good, if something I supported takes food out of a mouth, I was wrong. Humans come before statutes. Nobody's applied the second amendment to the abortion debate. The intent of the founding fathers regarding the second amendment was clearly to allocate for the self-defense of the populace even if it may be to the detriment of an offending party. Does a pregnant individual not have the right to stand their own ground and fend off entities that will do them harm? Plastic is the new lead. Humans shouldn't be drinking animal milk (I drink a lot of chocolate milk, so this is a dig at myself too). Meat is as essential to the culinary arts as sugar, but it's also as essential to human sustenance as sugar. The next "got milk?" will be disseminated through Internet memes. I'm not in favor of banning anything; abortion or firearms. I think a national firearm ban to some extent may be inevitable but I'm not too torn up about it. A bullet doesn't have much practical use beyond taking a life or practicing for it. I want a Nintendo Wii powered through USB-C. A holocaust will happen before 2050. This game of "telephone" that is generational education didn't impress upon this generation the gravity of the Holocaust committed by the Nazis in the 1940s. The Nazis had a fetish for documentation; the next holocaust will be recorded literally in 4K Ultra HD. In a desensitized world, will that even make a difference for the children of 2160? In the information war that will be World War III, who will win - the Americans, who can't tamp down obvious misinformation such as "Pizzagate" or that the COVID-19 vaccines have microchips, or the Russians, who manufactured these rumors? "Americans" and "Russians" here are not literal names. To me it's conceivable that gender nonconforming and non-heterosexual individuals would be targeted as scapegoats for a future manufactured "struggle" in the same way the Nazis chose Jews to be the primary scapegoats for "degeneration". Outliers are routinely paraded as examples of the queer community by those who wish to discredit it. External parties try to break the LGBT+ umbrella into the "LGB and others" or "lesbians and gays, but not bisexuals". The latter for acceptance (exceptance?) from those who conduct the former. All wins temporary at best. /blah/2022-06-19.html : Some things I've been thinking about The UNIX philosophy ("create things that do one thing well") is a mandate rather than a suggestion; programs can and will fall under their own weight if you allow them to become too complex with too many things dependent on other things. From a software design standpoint I've found this to be very useful. However, I think focusing on software complexity is treating the symptoms of Bad Computing rather than the disease. The core issue is that humans should not have to change themselves for a machine - the machine should only ever be changed for the human. After all, a computer is simply a tool. Interchangeable (right?), repairable (right?), intuitive (right?), and a means to an end (right?). Lately humans have been having to change themselves for machines. There are easily comprehendable issues - e.g. "I don't have a first name, how do I fill out this form?" - but there are also denser, deeper problems in this regard - in fact, even computer literacy education is itself changing humans in favor of machines. Software should be designed to be basically intuitive to someone that's never used a computer and ideally need no further skills. This probably started with the Old Engineers who were basically breathing computer before computers were even existent in their modern form. Graybeards (women and nonbinary fellows included within this word, use your imagination) didn't need to change themselves for computers because they and machina were already kin. Then they made simple interfaces for the restivus and hoped it was enough, and it was for a while. Once we defeat the status quo, the rest will be easy. The Center for Disease Control in the United States isn't perfect but I trust them a bit more than a bald guy on Spotify. Today's Juneteenth, which is a memory to a pretty cool event, the end of lawful slavery in the United States.