2024-08-09
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							@ -1050,6 +1050,98 @@ pre { /* DRY who? */
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}
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/blah/2024-08-09.html
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Last night I got pretty drunk and then smoked a joint and got very high,
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bringing me to the otherworldly state of crossfadia. Let me describe the scene.
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[...] pours a double shot of tequila and some margarita mix into a salt rimmed
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coffee mug. Why a coffee mug? There were only four cocktail glasses. Why
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cocktail glasses? There were no margherita - wait, how do you spell that?
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Fuckin hell I'm looking it up. Mike Alpha Romeo Golf Alpha Romeo India Tango
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Alpha. M A R G A R I T A. Got it. There were no margarita glasses. The cocktail
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glasses were pretty easy to rim with salt - salt, a little water, a pyrex
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because the plates are in the dishwasher, then roll inwards. The coffee mug -
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my coffee mug, by the way, the black one that has a weird handle - did not
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behave so well. Eventually there was enough salt on it to haunt a sailor and so
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a double shot of tequila and some margarita mix went in. Are you sure you don't
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want to add a little more tequila?
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[...]: I already pour heavy-handidly, Trin.
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That's true. I tried the margarita and I thought it was pretty good, I liked
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how the salt complemented the bitterness of the alcohol. Everybody else slowly
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tried theirs and remarked upon how awful their drinks were. But they can't
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handle their alcohol anyway.
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[...]: Hey, do you wanna try tequila shots?
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For lack of limes: I balled my left fist and, with the ring of my index finger
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and thumb parallel to the floor, [...] put about three or four drops of lime
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juice (from a bottle) on the flat part of my fist at that angle, told me to rub
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it on the skin, not to rub it /in/ or anything but just to spread it around to
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give it more surface area. Alright. It added salt. [...] poured heavy-handidly
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again; a single for my friend, a double for me. Alright. We - what order was it
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in again? - I think we licked the lime-and-salt, then took the shots.
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[...]: You took that shot like a champ. Unfazed.
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It's easy to seem good at drinking when you had so much bitter coffee as a kid
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- real battery acid sort of coffee. "Good" at drinking, says the almost-
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alcoholic. Not really. I've never found it difficult to function for my desire
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for Russian Fire-Water (in this case, though, I believe it was Spanish) but I
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sure act like an alcoholic according to some of my friends. Perhaps I'm just
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silly.
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No, no, I'm not even drunk yet - and I wasn't. But I would be. The shots hadn't
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hit quite yet. Still, I had two more. Then all six hit me like a Japanese train
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hits yet another suicidal pedestrian. Honk honk!
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I fell to the ground. Under my control, of course. I simply wanted to feel the
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gravity. It felt great.
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[...]: You're drunk.
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No, I said, getting to my feet and perching a magnificent flamingo pose, I am
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quite agile, like a shit software development cycle. I'm zen.
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[...]: Uh huh.
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Then we went out and [...] and I smoked two joints, one each, and during that I
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realized I became crossfaded and got really horny and started hitting on faer
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and fae put a cigarette out on me which we both knew I would really like, and
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now the burn is a cute blister on my arm.
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Then we went in and I don't quite remember the rest except that I probably
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didn't have sex (speaking for myself; it would have been fine if I did, but I'm
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glad I didn't because it would have probably not been that great) because I
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woke up in the living room on the futon at about god-knows-when in the morning
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with a trickle of dawn light eeking through the blinds and Pop Tart wrappers on
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the living room table - two of them. No, three. Plus an empty bottle of Moxie
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for which [...] was gonna suck me off.
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A fox was drinking out of the tap, so I let it, and it left and I filled my
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coffee mug with water and drank it and it tasted like the margarita mix still.
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: the last burger work poetry for now
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you could say I'm from somewhere or so
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halfway between anywhere and none at all
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blissfully ignorant of mortal concerns
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head made of metal with nothing left to learn
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2024-08-06
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it's been some time since I've loved
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been such a long time with no one
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waiting a long time in this brush
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I'm surviving on an island
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lovin' ain't findin' me
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hopin' ain't findin' me
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searchin' ain't gettin' me
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out of my misery
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/blah/2024-08-08.html
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It's the wee hour of the morning, nearly 0333 in my time zone. I'm hunched over
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@ -1384,6 +1476,79 @@ my blah posts of the last ten months.
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It's 0600 now.
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And now 2100, a sleep, a day, and two four six shots since. I'm adding a note
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here: One Step Beyond, by Madness, rocks.
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I am considerably drunk so now is a good time to write. About what, though, I
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don't know. I just hit my Escape key probably fifty times trying to Escape from
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INSERT mode only to realize I was in NORMAL mode after the first hit. God, I
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love vi(1).
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[...]: you should write about Moxie. You should write about drinking Moxie
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       after an amazing run of drunk sex. Have you ever had drunk sex?
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I've not quite had drunk sex, except one time after playing strip poker, though
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we were both somewhat sober by the end of it.
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[...]: You and [...]?
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Yeah.
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[...]: You should write about on-line friends. The experience of having on-line
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       friends.
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Alright, I'll write about on-line friends. What is there to write about? I'm
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living with most of them. On-line friends... now off-line friends. Meatspace.
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Of all my on-line friends I've fucked a couple, some way or another. I feel
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like Bukowski. I love sex, though. It's fun. It's a connection. Maybe I should
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write about sex.
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So how do I feel about sex? I've had sex a lot more times than I've cum during
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sex. Sex hurts in a good way, the biting. Sex is a jumbled frenzy, a soft free-
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for-all, a terrible blue whale in the ocean to admire from afar and hunt
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forever. Sex is a smooth churning waterfall, a soft boiled egg. Sex is a
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poached egg. It feels so good, so so good, amazing, fatty and protein and sweet
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and amazing and then it ends and it was just an egg. How the hell did an egg
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feel so good? Because it was sex, dumbass.
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[...]: xenofem.me users cannot convince anyone that they've actually had sex.
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That's true.
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I stare at everyone's asses. My enemies, my friends, my lovers, my
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acquaintances. Just looking! I like looking at asses. I've never had
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penetrative sex, no matter me or someone else doing the penetrating. Surely
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someone is pentrating somewhere. What am I talking about? I am drunk.
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flags decorate the walls
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some of which i am
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some of which i am not
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the calendar decorates the wall
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i'm on it
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my work is on it
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i'm married to my work
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my bitch wife
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i beat her
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i come into her,
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i treat her like shit,
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i smoke, i drink,
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i fuck her,
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i eat too much ice cream
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i fucking hated my job
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i left her
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she's gone
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i think about her
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how my fingers worked
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slowly dissecting her
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my work carving into her,
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chopping her up
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i get paid
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prostitution
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what does it matter
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we all have to eat
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[...]: Holy bingle. 
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/blah/2024-07-31.html
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