2023-08-14
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@ -1928,6 +1928,172 @@ If I don't, escalate the issue to the host of this site (this can also be found
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/blah/2023-08-14.html
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2021-01-12
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sitcom.txt
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CARLOS walks into the room.
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FELL: So, how'd it go?
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CARLOS: It went well. It went pretty well.
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CARLOS faints onto the sofa. FELL grabs a bottle of water and pours a
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third of it on CARLOS.
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FELL: Well? Just well? Did you...
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CARLOS (sputtering from the water): Yeah. Yeah we did. It was... sexy.
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FELL: Sexy?
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CARLOS: I mean, I almost died. But it was sexy.
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FELL: How?..
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CARLOS: Ah.. strangulation?
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FELL: Strangulation?
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CARLOS: I was suspended from her ceiling fan by a rope.
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FELL: Oh.
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CARLOS: I just need to take a quick nap to recuperate here.
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FELL: Is that why you have a new turtleneck?
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CARLOS: Yeah. She gave it to me when she took me out to Dennys.
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FELL: Oh, well that was nice of her.
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CARLOS: On a leash.
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FELL: A leash?
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CARLOS: I was fortunately wearing a paper bag, so it's okay. No embarrassment.
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FELL: How did you eat?
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CARLOS: I didn't. She said she was going to peg me later.
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FELL: Did she?
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CARLOS: Yes.
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FELL: Was it your first time?
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CARLOS: No. Thank god. She pulled out a nine-incher-
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FELL: Jesus, a nine-incher?
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CARLOS: That's what she called it. It was more than a foot though.
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FELL: The nine inches was...
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CARLOS: The nine inches was its girth. Yeah.
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FELL: Did it hurt?
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CARLOS: Not really, she gave me some drugs or something-
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FELL: Let me see your eyes.
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FELL shines a bright light into CARLOS'S eyes. Their pupils shrink.
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FELL: Your eyes aren't dilated.
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CARLOS: Yeah, I'm not still high or anything.
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FELL: So, she hanged you up like a pin~ata-
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CARLOS: Like some kind of French pin~ata-
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FELL: and then after she was done with you there, doing?..
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CARLOS: She put a vibrator in my ass.
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FELL: So you were swinging around by your neck with a vibrator in your ass?
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CARLOS: In my ass and two on my nipples.
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FELL (concerned): Was all of this consensual?
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CARLOS: What, does she seem like a fucking monster to you? Of course it was.
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FELL: I was just checking.
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CARLOS: I loved that shit. We're going on our second date next Friday.
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FELL: That was the first date?
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CARLOS: That was me coming over to play video games. Things just snowballed.
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2021-12-03
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priongod.odt
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I am rotting. I can feel it. My brain eats at my skull at my eyes at my
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tongue my tongue. Left arm gone. GOne. I am sitting in this freezer rotting.
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The flies cannot find me but it doesn’t matter. In the years after I am gone
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the precipitation the weather the wind the rain the snow the sleet the hail
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will fall will reign will blow will fall will fall will destroy this building
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not today not tomorrow not in a hundred years but. IN a hundred years. Plus
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one. Plus one day. The rust, the rot, the rot of the barrier between me and the
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world will become rot in here with me with what used to be me. And my rot, my
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sacred rot, will join the world’s. And the flies will find me will find what’s
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left and they will love me and I shall bE THEIR GOD. But now as I sit I a,m no
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GOD no MESSIA the messiah came and I was weak as were everyone ELSE. We are all
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dead. I am merely the last animate in a sea of death.
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I was seven days younger when the fast moving slow destroying
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harbringer of harrowing horror bit flipped and started eating a cow a hundred
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magnitudes’ faster. Deus ex bovem venit.
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Nobody at work read the news. Then half the cows in Canada died in the
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span of eight hours. Nobody at work could afford to hide from the news anymore.
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Fast food. Our lives were made from the deaths and consumption of cows.
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By the time the corporation that owned the building in which I made my
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living determined the price of the new scarce burger the rest of the cows in
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Canada had died too, and half the people had died with them. It was at this
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point that people started to worry.
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Six days ago I woke up to an alarm clock that would never ring again to
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a world that had changed and to the realization that I could not feel my left
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foot.
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2021-12-23
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epilogue.odt
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I woke up at dawn to the peace of my home, got out of bed, without
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making it, a single pillow and blankets on a tatami mat, next to some books,
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found in the basement of a church, some of its stones even still standing,
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whatever denomination it was wiped away with its believers, said good morning
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to my mother and father, whom I love, and who taught me love, love the only
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thing I know, war wiped away, destroyed not by itself but by something smaller,
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greater, got out the door, spoke my hello to the cow, the chicken, the grass,
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the flowers, and began my stroll through the green, my daily walk, through the
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once urbanus field, the only thing remaining being the dust of concrete and
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glass, metal, lithium, my stroll my favorite exercise, through the peace of the
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outside, from the peace of my home, in this piece of the world.
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With the ascending sun today to my starboard, I walked through my field
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of soy and wheat and potatoes, almost undisturbed by rot. I kept beatpace until
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it reached halfway between the heaven and the dirt which was when I came to the
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barrier, new, of the century, that had bothered me last moon. There it stood.
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Moss had yet to take its rightful place and no cracks were in its boulders.
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Enough powder we had to take us again to this season, more than enough barrels,
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yes, but I’d have liked more soy just in case. More soy in that place. Now
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there were only stones and flowers.
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By the sun’s peak I’d returned home, and knowing my father had known
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this land before I’d known this life, I found him in a rocking chair in the
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pasture, rocking back and forth, staring at a lone tree in the shadow, his hand
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fallen to his side, fingers brushing the cow, whose own chest rose and fell, as
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he rocked, the cow laying next to him in the same peace. “Father, do you know
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the edifice, beatpace eighth the right sun from home, new as it stands?”
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He didn’t open his eyes. “Yes, if you can call it that. My own father
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built it. Do you know why it stands?”
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“No.”
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My father took his hand from the cow and traced the air. “It…” he
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trailed off. “The words flee. Where are we to Sol?”
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“Nine suns past its solstice.”
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He smiled. “Bo; go back to the stones. You’ll see why your ancestor
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erected them.”
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I returned to the stones by the time evening started to take its toll,
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sat by the flowers, and waited for epiphany. It came after the sun’s set, when
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a low roar rose from the sun’s resting place. I lay staring up at the brilliant
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night sky when the roar swallowed me all at once. Jumping to my feet, I saw it
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all around me, a black mass, running past me towards the sea. A herd of cattle.
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I’d never seen one before, nor had I seen so many fauna in the same place,
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twenty or thirty cows running towards what I had never known. I and the moon
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above me stood upright watching them go.
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After I slept I returned to my father, still in the pasture. The cow’s
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chest was stationary.
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“Miles, did you find what you sought?”
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“Yes.”
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My father seemed weary. “Would you say it’s been nice, to be here? To
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exist in this world?”
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The tree’s leaves were as green as I remembered. “Yes. It’s a good
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world.”
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Father smiled. “I’m glad you see it this way.”
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/blah/2023-08-12.html
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Five more days.
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The tubes are in the process of being packed. I'm gonna do some cleaning this
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morning (maybe). I have a shit ton of Thinkpad X200 Tablets from work I was
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doing and I was gonna give one or two to locals but I think our government
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provided tablets are enough for everyone.
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I don't have the energy to explain. Through some government program the needy,
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after filling out half a dozen forms, are given a free ten-inch tablet and a
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15GB/month 4G LTE data plan that will be paid for until whatever act provides
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it expires. Or you can bribe the person handing them out. $20 bought me a ten-
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inch tablet and 15GB/month indefinite data plan. I don't feel bad because I
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most likely qualify, I just hate forms. I can't figure them out. Something in
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my noggin just can't do paperwork. I've been using the government tablet for
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piracy. Breaking the law with government approval works pretty well for the
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CIA, at least.
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I got new Doc Martens and I feel scummy about it. They're a leather product. A
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cow died so my feet could be dry. They don't make 1460 SRs (slip resistants)
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vegan and I need them for kitchen jobs - while regular 1460s are good enough
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for a kitchen, I need my boots to be unimpeachably adequate, which these
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standards-compliant boots are. And they cost an arm and a leg but hopefully
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they're worth it.
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/blah/2023-08-06.html
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The blah/ works now as well as it did early July, but is based on homepage, my
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